Every episode from all 12 seasons of the American sitcom. Charlie
(Charlie Sheen) is a well-to-do bachelor with a house on the beach
but his casual Malibu lifestyle is interrupted when his tightly
wound brother, Alan (Jon Cryer), who's facing a divorce, and Alan's
son, Jake (Angus T. Jones), come to stay with him. Season 1
episodes are: 'Pilot', 'Big Flappy Bastards', 'Go East On Sunset
Until You Reach the Gates of Hell', 'If I Can't Write My Chocolate
Song I'm Going to Take a Nap', 'The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind
Up With a Hump', 'Did You Check With the Captain of the Flying
Monkeys?', 'If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake',
'Twenty-Five Little Pre-pubers Without a Snoot-ful', 'Phase One,
Complete', 'Merry Thanksgiving', 'Alan Harper, Frontier
Chiropractor', 'Camel Filters and Pheromones', 'Sarah Like Puny
Alan', 'I Can't Afford Hyenas', 'Round One to the Crazy Hot Chick',
'That Was Saliva, Alan', 'Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats',
'An Old Flame With a New Wick', 'I Remember the Coatroom, I Just
Don't Remember You', 'Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark', 'No
Sniffing, No Wowing', 'My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet', 'Just Like
Buffalo' and 'Can You Feel My Finger?'. Season 2 episodes are:
'Back Off Mary Poppins', 'Enjoy Those Garlic Balls', 'A Bag Full of
Jawea', 'Go Get Mommy's Bra', 'Bad News from the Clinic', 'The
Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance', 'A Kosher
Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana', 'Frankenstein and the Horny
Villagers', 'Yes, Monsignor', 'The Salmon Under My Sweater', ' Last
Chance to See Those Tattoos', 'A Lungful of Alan', 'Get Off My
Hair', 'Those Ping Things With Coconut', 'Smell the Umbrella
Stand', 'Can You Eat Human Flesh With Wooden Teeth?', 'Woohoo, a
Hernia Exam!', 'It Was Mame, Mom', 'A Low Guttural Tongue-Flapping
Noise', 'I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey', 'A Sympathetic Crotch to
Cry On', 'That Old Hose Bag is My Mother', 'Squab, Squab, Squab,
Squab, Squab' and 'Does This Smell Funny To You?'. Season 3
episodes are: 'Weekend in Bangkok With Two Olympic Gymnasts',
'Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover', 'Carpet Burns and a Bite
Mark', 'Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs', 'We Called It Mr.
Pinky', 'Hi, Mr. Horned One', 'Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop', 'That
Voodoo That I Do Do', 'Madame and Her Special Friend', 'Something
Salted and Twisted', 'Santa's Village of the Damned', 'That Special
Tug', 'Humiliation Is a Visual Medium', 'Love Isn't Blind, It's
Retarded', 'My Tongue Is Meat', 'Ergo, the Booty Call', 'The
Unfortunate Little Schnauser', 'The Spit-Covered Cobbler', 'Golly
Moses, She's a Muffin', 'Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro', 'And
the Plot Moistens', 'Just Once With Aunt Sophie', 'Arguments for
the Quickie' and 'That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite'. Season 4
episodes are: 'Working for Caligula', 'Who's Vod Kanockers?', 'The
Sea Is a Harsh Mistress', 'A Pot Smoking Monkey', 'A Live Woman of
Proven Fertility', 'Apologies for the Frivolity', 'Repeated Blows
to His Unformed Head', 'Release the Dogs', 'Corey's Been Dead for
an Hour', 'Kissing Abraham Lincoln', 'Walnuts and Demerol',
'Castrating Sheep in Montana', 'Don't Worry, Speed Racer', 'That's
Summer Sausage, Not Salami', 'My Damn Stalker', 'Young People Have
Phlegm Too', 'I Merely Slept With a Commie', 'It Never Rains in
Hooterville', 'Smooth As a Ken Doll', 'Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a
Lot', 'Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous', 'Mr. McGlue's Feedbag',
'Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-Lookin'' and 'Prostitutes and
Gelato'. Season 5 episodes are: 'Large Birds, Spiders and Mom',
'Media Room Slash Dungeon', 'Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo', 'City of
Great Racks', 'Putting Swim Fins On a Cat', 'Help Daddy Find His
Toenail', 'The Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room', 'Is There a Mrs.
Waffles?', 'Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids', 'Kinda Like
Necrophilia', 'Meander to Your Dander', 'A Little Clammy and None
Too Fresh', 'The Soil Is Moist', 'Winky-Dink Time', 'Rough Night in
Hump Junction', 'Look at Me, Mommy, I'm Pretty', 'Fish in a
Drawer', 'If My Hole Could Talk' and 'Waiting for the Right
Snapper'. Season 6 episodes are: 'Taterhead Is Our Love Child',
'Pie Hole, Herb', 'Damn You, Eggs Benedict', 'The Flavin' and the
Mavin'', 'A Jock Strap in Hell', 'It's Always Nazi Week', 'Best
H.O. Money Can Buy', 'Pinocchio's Mouth', 'The Mooch at the Boo',
'He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited', 'The Devil's Lube', 'Thank
God for Scoliosis', 'I Think You Offended Don', 'David Copperfield
Slipped Me a Roofie', 'I'd Like to Start With the Cat', 'She'll
Still Be Dead at Halftime', 'The 'Ocu' Or the 'Pado'?', 'My Son's
Enormous Head', 'The Two Finger Rule', 'Hello, I'm Alan Cousteau',
'Above Exalted Cyclops', 'Sir Lancelot's Litter Box', 'Good
Morning, Mrs. Butterworth' and 'Baseball Was Better With Steroids'.
Season 7 episodes are: '818-jklpuzo', 'Whipped Unto the Third
Generation', 'Mmm, Fish. Yum.', 'Laxative Tester, Horse
Inseminator', 'For the Sake of the Child', 'Give Me Your Thumb',
'Untainted By Filth', 'Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle.', 'Captain Terry's
Spray-On Hair', 'That's Why They Call It Ball Room', 'Warning, It's
Dirty', 'Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste', 'Yay, No Polyps', 'Crude and
Uncalled For', 'Aye, Aye, Captain', 'Tinkle Like a Princess', 'I
Found Your Moustache', 'Ixnay On the Oggie Day', 'Keith Moon Is
Vomiting in His Grave', 'I Called Him Magoo', 'Gumby With a Pokey'
and 'This Is Not Gonna End Well'. Season 8 episodes are: 'Three
Girls and a Guy Named Bud', 'A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer', 'A
Pudding-Filled Cactus', 'Hookers, Hookers, Hookers', 'The Immortal
Mr. Billy Joel', 'Twanging Your Magic Cleaner', 'The Crazy Bitch
Gazette', 'Springtime On a Stick', 'A Good Time in Central Africa',
'Ow, Ow, Don't Stop', 'Dead from the Waist Down', 'Chocolate
Diddlers Or My Puppy's Dead', 'Skunk, Dog, Crap and Ketchup',
'Lookin' for Japanese Subs', 'Three Hookers and a Philly
Cheesesteak' and 'That Darn Priest'. Season 9 episodes are: 'Nice
to Meet You, Walden Schmidt', 'People Who Love Peepholes', 'Big
Girls Don't Throw Food', 'Nice Magic Fingers', 'A Giant Cat Holding
a Churro', 'The Squat and the Hover', 'Those Fancy Japanese
Toilets', 'Thank You for the Intercourse', 'Frodo's Headshots', 'A
Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes', 'What a Lovely Landing Strip', 'One
False Move, Zimbabwe!', 'Slowly and in a Circular Fashion', 'A
Possum On Chemo', 'The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack', 'Sips, Sonnets and
Sodomy', 'Not in My Mouth!', 'The War Against Gingivitis',
'Palmdale, Ech', 'Grandma's Pie', 'Mr. Hose Says 'Yes'', 'Why We
Gave Up Women', 'The Straw in My Donut Hole' and 'Oh Look!
Al-Qaeda!'. Season 10 episodes are: 'I Changed My Mind About the
Milk', 'A Big Bag of Dog', 'Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt',
'You Do Know What the Lollipop Is For', 'That's Not What They Call
It in Amsterdam', 'Ferrets, Attack', 'Avoid the Chinese Mustard',
'Something My Gynecologist Said', 'I Scream When I Pee', 'One Nut
Johnson', 'Give Santa a Tail-Hole', 'Welcome to Alancrest', 'Grab a
Feather and Get in Line', 'Run, Steven Staven! Run!', 'Paint It,
Pierce It Or Plug It', 'Advantage - Fat, Flying Baby', 'Throgwarten
Middle School Mysteries', 'The 9:04 from Pemberton', 'Big Episode.
Someone Stole a Spoon', 'Bazinga! That's from a TV Show', 'Another
Night With Neil Diamond', 'My Bodacious Vidalia' and 'Cows, Prepare
to Be Tipped'. Season 11 episodes are: 'Nangnangnangnang', 'I Think
I Banged Lucille Ball', 'This Unblessed Biscuit', 'Clank, Clank,
Drunken Skank', 'Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003', 'Justice
in Star-Spangled Hot Pants', 'Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie',
'Mr.Walden, He Die. I Clean Room.', 'Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer',
'On Vodka, On Soda, On Blender, On Mixer', 'Tazed in the Lady
Nuts', 'Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball.', 'Bite Me, Supreme
Court', 'Three Fingers of Crème de Menthe', 'Cab Fare and a Bottle
of Penicillin', 'How to Get Rid of Alan Harper', 'Welcome Home,
Jake', 'West Side Story', 'Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang', 'Lotta
Delis in Little Armenia', 'Dial 1-900-Mix-A-Lot' and 'Oh WALD-E,
Good Times Ahead'. Season 12 episodes are: 'The Ol' Mexican
Spinach', 'A Chic Bar in Ibiza', 'Glamping in a Yurt',
'Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight', 'Oontz. Oontz. Oontz.',
'Alan Shot a Little Girl', 'Sex With an Animated Ed Asner',
'Family, Bublé, Deep-Fried Turkey', 'Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy,
Lyndsey', 'Here I Come, Pants!', 'For Whom the Booty Calls', 'A
Beer-Battered Rip-Off', 'Boompa Loved His Hookers', 'Don't Give a
Monkey a Gun' and 'Of Course He's Dead'.
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