Everyone is afraid. Sometimes fear is inappropriate and unnecessary. At other times, we have good reason to be afraid. But in every case, fear reduces our ability to be ourselves. It convinces us we shouldn’t take chances or risks. This book is for people who want to let go of unreasonable fear or act more creatively in the face of reasonable fear. It explores the roots of fear—the fear of change, of self-disclosure, of giving and receiving, of being alone. Beneath all of these is the greatest fear of all: the fear of loving and being loved. This 25th anniversary edition speaks of the enduring message of the book and this new edition has been greatly updated and expanded to include more contemporary developments in psychology and current events. Every chapter of the book has been rewritten and revised with a new audience in mind. Some new sections have been added and existing sections revised. This revised and updated edition reflects the author’s growing understanding of the ageless concern in our lives—becoming free from fear so that we can be more resourceful in our life. †

Most of us, at one time or another, would like to help a friend, family member, or acquaintance through a challenging time. But do we really know how to give meaningful support and guidance? And why do our best efforts at helping others often come up short? Here is a practical guide that will be of special interest to helping professionals--and anyone who wants to make a positive difference in the lives of people they care about.
To be truly helpful to others, Karen Wegela explains, we must begin by focusing on ourselves. We must develop greater awareness, steadiness of mind, fearlessness, and self-compassion. Only then can we extend these qualities to the people we'd like to help. Drawing on her experiences as a psychotherapist and on her longtime study of Buddhist meditation, Wegela emphasizes the benefits of mindfulness, or learning to become fully present in our moment-to-moment experience. Through mindfulness we develop a fearless, compassionate presence in our daily lives--and we become better listeners, take wiser actions, and give more valuable, effective guidance to the people we'd like to help.

Work with your triggers to find peace in the painful moments and lasting emotional well-being.

Psychotherapist David Richo examines the science of triggers and our reactions of fear, anger, and sadness. He helps us understand why our bodies respond before our minds have a chance to make sense of a situation. By looking deeply at the roots of what provokes us--the words, actions, and even sensory elements like smell--we find opportunities to understand the origins of our triggers and train our bodies to remain calm in the face of painful memories.

The book offers in-the-moment exercises on how to process difficult emotions and physical manifestations in order to to cultivate the inner resources necessary to deal with recurring memories of trauma. When we are triggered, Richo writes, "we are being bullied by our own unfinished business." Explore what your body's knee-jerk reactions can teach you. Triggers: How We Can Stop Reacting and Start Healing acts as a guide to your body's powerful responses, helping you to remain calm under pressure and discover the key to emotional healing.

Most relationship problems are essentially trust issues, explains psychotherapist David Richo. Whether it's fear of commitment, insecurity, jealousy, or a tendency to be controlling, the real obstacle is a fundamental lack of trust--both in ourselves and in our partner.
"Daring to Trust" offers key insights and practical exercises for exploring and addressing our trust issues in relationships. Topics include:
- How we learn early in life to trust others (or not to trust them)
- Why we fear trusting
- Developing greater trust in ourselves as the basis for trusting others
- How to know if someone is trustworthy
- Naive trust vs. healthy, adult trust
- What to do when trust is broken

Ultimately, Richo explains, we must develop trust in four directions: toward ourselves, toward others, toward life as it is, and toward a higher power or spiritual path. These four types of trust are not only the basis of healthy relationships, they are also the foundation of emotional well-being and freedom from fear.

Over the past twenty years, psychotherapist and author David Richo has been gathering powerful quotations from many authors and traditions, quotations that have both given him comfort and challenged him to grow. Now, he has decided to share this very personal collection with fellow seekers. He invites each of us to use these sparks of illumination as he does, as springboards for meditation, reflection and the deepening of our spiritual life. David Richo, PhD is a retreat leader, widely read author, and psychotherapist in Santa Barbara and San Francisco. He is the author of many books, including: Catholic Means Universal: Integrating Spirituality and Religion (Crossroad, 2000) and The Sacred Heart of the World: Restoring Mystical Devotion to Our Spiritual Life (Paulist Press, 2007).

David Richo explores our tendency to transfer potent feelings about people from the past onto the people in our lives, whether they are our intimate partners, co-workers, or friends. This can become a major stumbling block in relationships, so Richo offers advice on how to free ourselves from this destructive pattern.

You and your ego: how to develop a healthy sense of self without becoming an egotist—and how to see through that sense of self for the happiness of yourself and others.

How can you build the healthy ego necessary to be effective in life—yet avoid the kind of egotism that makes people dislike you? Don't worry; Dave Richo has the answers. His new book shows you how to navigate the tricky waters between egotism and selflessness in a way that avoids both extremes and makes you much more effective and loving. The key is to acknowledge your ego and to be kind to it, before you ultimately learn to let it go. As with all Dave's books, this one is full of examples from myth and religion, with plenty of exercises and practical advice.

How to let love into our lives, and how to express that love to the world at large--the latest from a best-selling author. We were made to love and be loved. Loving ourselves and others is in our genetic code. It's nothing other than the purpose of our lives--but knowing that doesn't make it easy to do. We may find it a challenge to love ourselves. We may have a hard time letting love in from others. We're often afraid of getting hurt. It is also sometimes scary for us to share love with those around us--and love that isn't shared leaves us feeling flat and unfulfilled. David Richo provides the tools here for learning how to love in evolved adult ways--beginning with getting past the barriers that keep us from loving ourselves, then showing how we can learn to open to love others. The first challenge is that we have a hard time letting love in: recognizing it, accepting it from others. We're afraid of it, of getting hurt. The second, related problem is that we're unable to share love with those around us--and love that isn't shared isn't truly love. The first step to learning to love and be loved, according to Richo's model, is to identify the different levels of love so that you can hit each one separately. He breaks it down to three: - Level One: Positive Connection. As simple as being courteous, respectful, helpful, and honest, and decent in all our dealings. Pretty basic, but it makes the world a better place, and it's the essential foundation for growing in love. - Level Two: Caring and Personal Connection. Intimacy and commitment to friends, family, partners, lovers. Commitment to others. - Level Three: Unconditional and Universal. Transcending the love of individuals to the love of all beings; self-sacrificing. The love expressed in the Sermon on the Mount and the Bodhicharyavatara. This level of love isn't for a heroic few, it's everyone's calling. He then shows us how to incorporate these varieties of love into our lives. It's a relief to know that even just aspiring to incorporate them really changes things. He also provides exercises and guided meditations for identifying and getting through the things that keep you from getting and giving love at each of these three levels. Through the lens of these types of love, Richo covers topics such as: how to still be yourself while loving another; how to embrace your dark side; what to do when the one who loves you dies; need versus fear; clinging; healthy sexuality, including fantasies and how to experience pleasure without guilt; how to break distructive patterns in your relationships; and how to have safe conversations with your loved one. Richo provides wisdom from Buddhism, psychology, and a range of spiritual traditions, along with a wealth of practices both for avoiding the pitfalls that can occur in love relationships and for enhancing the way love shows up in our lives. He then leads us on to love's inevitable outcome: developing a heart that loves universally and indiscriminately. This transcendent and unconditional love isn't just for a heroic few, Richo shows, it's everyone's magnificent calling.

We already possess everything we need to have satisfying relationships and a happy, fulfilling life; all we need to do is learn how to bring forth our natural wisdom--which includes our innate kindness, understanding, and courage. Psychotherapist David Richo draws on four decades of his counseling experience to create this manual on how to nurture the best in ourselves and our relationships. He teaches how to access our natural abilities to:

- Care for ourselves as the basis of caring for others
- Find freedom from fear
- Maintain healthy boundaries in relationships
- Develop greater honesty with ourselves and others
- Let go of regret

The book also includes practical exercises--including journaling, contemplation, and guided meditations--to foster inward growth and lasting positive change.
This book is a completely revised and updated edition of "Everyday Commitments."

This book offers a fresh and inspiring approach to personal growth, one that taps into our inherent creativity and the versatility of poetry. In "Being True to Life", psychotherapist David Richo explains how writing and reading poetry can be a rich path of self-exploration and emotional healing for anyone, no matter one's poetic abilities. Richo offers a range of practical exercises for exploring how poetry can help us to become more aware, to heal, and to grow emotionally and spiritually. Exercises include free writing; composing autobiographical poems; writing a poem to your fears; and, composing poems based on childhood memories, significant experiences, and dreams. Richo also offers guidance on how to read poetry in a way that can be personally transformative. Praise for previous books by David Richo: 'Richo gently and compassionately coaches readers. His book will help those seeking personal transformation' - "Publishers Weekly". 'Lucid, thought-provoking, and illuminating' - Martha Beck, author of "Finding Your Own North Star". 'As useful a self-help book as one is likely to find' - Huston Smith.