Most people understand that what an emergency is and only call out the police, fire brigade or ambulance when they really need to. However, there is a weird minority who will dial 911 if they lose their keys, if their phone isn't working, if they need a lift home from a party or even if they have become hopelessly trapped in their own duvet! This hilarious collection of true stories brings together some of the world's most ridiculous emergency calls, including: - The woman who called the police because MacDonalds was out of Chicken Mcnuggets. - The priest who dialed 999 because WHSmiths at Manchester Airporte wouldn't let him use their toilet - The boy who called an ambulance because his poodle was looking sad. - The man whose watch read the same time for three hours who called the police to report that...wait for it...time was standing still - Then there was the man who had taken too much viagra...

The OAP fined for walking too slowly... the market traders banned from putting bunting on the lamp posts... the woman who was told she'd be fined if the birds in her garden didn't stop singing... the workmen who painted yellow lines over a dead badger... This wonderfully entertaining book collects some of the most outrageous examples of health and safety gone mad, bureacracy running riot, and jobsworth joylessness. With hilarious illustrations throughout, these tales may amuse you or infuriate you, depending on how recently you have fallen victim to your own local jobsworths.