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For those who have a friend that has been devastated by the loss of
a loved one. When others care enough to rub shoulders with grieving
friends and are willing to be inconvenienced. It requires someone
to care enough to put aside cliche condolences and stick close
through a long grieving process. An individual's grief can never be
'fixed'. But friends can wash a sink full of dishes, listen, go
along on a cemetery visit. Sharing another's grief is not about
'fixing-it'- it's about showing up.Harold Ivan Smith, popular
speaker and grief educator, guides others to respond with their
heart. He shows tangible, meaningful ways to make a significant
difference as one journeys through grief with someone they care
about.
Acts of caring and compassion can make all the difference in a
grieving child's life. Adults can often worry about saying and
doing the right thing, too often giving children quick answers
instead of the support they really need.Widely-recognized grief
specialist Harold Ivan Smith explains that quick answers are not
what children need when they are grieving. They need support, and
most of all they need to be allowed to grieve-for as long as it
takes.With an ABC-like approach, Smith offers insights and
activities for the parent, teacher, or friend-anyone that loves a
child and wants to offer his or her support. This new and revised
edition of When a Child You Love is Grieving will help ensure that
the child is receiving the healthy and necessary outlets during the
loss of a loved one.
Nationally recognized grief educator Harold Ivan Smith brings over
twenty-five years of professional experience in grief recovery to
ABCs of Healthy Grieving. Seventy-two brief suggestions for healthy
grieving, each two-pages in length and titled starting with a
letter of the alphabet followed by an "I Can" statement, encourage
those suffering the loss of a loved one to grow through grief
spiritually and emotionally. One particular aspect of living with
grief day-to-day is introduced with relevant quotes and short
excerpts. Readers can read ABCs of Healthy Grieving cover to cover,
or choose a single topic to help them through their day.
'Vincent van Gogh's last words: La tristesse durea--the sadness
will never go away. It will not go away. But it will change.'
Sometimes grief can be overwhelming --especially over the holidays.
The world is moving forward and celebrating life, but for grievers
darkness pervades the holiday.This special gift book edition of
bestseller A Decembered Grief is designed to guide you on a journey
beyond that darkness and get out on the other side. You will learn
that the holidays aren t about presents or cookies or church
services-- they are about relationships. Harold Ivan Smith will
teach you how to alter traditions instead of abandoning them,
appreciate the grief styles of others, and befriend your grief
instead of dread it. The holidays can be tough. This book can help.
This book not only examines friendgrief from a theoretical and
clinical framework, but also Smith offers fascinating vignettes
from the lives of well-known friendgrievers such as Elton John,
Diane Sawyer, Ralph Abernathy, C. S. Lewis, Harry Truman, Tommy
Lasorda, Jimmy Carter, Fritz Mondale, Bill Clinton, Calvin Trillin,
and Alan King. The author includes moving narratives of numerous
individuals who have never gained notoriety but have become
seasoned friendgrievers.
What do Dexter King, Condoleeza Rice, Mackenzie King, Corazon
Aquino, Eleanor Roosevelt, Bill Cosby, Tony Dungy, Theodore
Roosevelt, George H. W. and Barbara Bush, Caroline Kennedy, Arthur
Ashe, Lady Bird Johnson, Colin Powell and C. S. Lewis have in
common? They all have significant grief experiences that have
shaped their lives in dramatic ways, stories that have also shaped
our lives.
Grieving individuals, through "borrowing narratives," look for
inspiration in biographic, historical and memoir accounts of
political and religious leaders, celebrities, sports figures, and
cultural icons. In a time of diminishing trust in heroes and
"sainted leaders," who will speak to us from their grief? In a
diverse society grief counselors and educators need to identify and
"mine" the experienced grief(s) of historical personalities for
resources for reflection and meaning-making. This book will help
readers:
- find, "read," evaluate, extract, and adapt
historical/biographical materials
- create bio-narrative resources for use in grief counseling and
grief education
- explore the wide diversity of experienced grief in biographical
narratives
- identify ways to "harness" grief narratives for personal
reflection.
In the aftermath of suicide, friends and family face a long road of
grief and reflection. With a sympathetic eye and a firm hand,
Harold Ivan Smith searches for the place of the spirit in the wake
of suicide. He asks how one may live a spiritual life as a
survivor, and he addresses the way faith is permanently altered by
the residue of stigma that attaches to suicide.
What do Dexter King, Condoleeza Rice, Mackenzie King, Corazon
Aquino, Eleanor Roosevelt, Bill Cosby, Tony Dungy, Theodore
Roosevelt, George H. W. and Barbara Bush, Caroline Kennedy, Arthur
Ashe, Lady Bird Johnson, Colin Powell and C. S. Lewis have in
common? They all have significant grief experiences that have
shaped their lives in dramatic ways, stories that have also shaped
our lives. Grieving individuals, through "borrowing narratives,"
look for inspiration in biographic, historical and memoir accounts
of political and religious leaders, celebrities, sports figures,
and cultural icons. In a time of diminishing trust in heroes and
"sainted leaders", who will speak to us from their grief? In a
diverse society grief counselors and educators need to identify and
"mine" the experienced grief(s) of historical personalities for
resources for reflection and meaning-making. This book will help
readers: find, "read," evaluate, extract, and adapt
historical/biographical materials create bio-narrative resources
for use in grief counseling and grief education explore the wide
diversity of experienced grief in biographical narratives identify
ways to "harness" grief narratives for personal reflection.
Modern approaches to the study of symplectic 4-manifolds and
algebraic surfaces combine a wide range of techniques and sources
of inspiration. Gauge theory, symplectic geometry,
pseudoholomorphic curves, singularity theory, moduli spaces, braid
groups, monodromy, in addition to classical topology and algebraic
geometry, combine to make this one of the most vibrant and active
areas of research in mathematics. It is our hope that the five
lectures of the present volume given at the C.I.M.E. Summer School
held in Cetraro, Italy, September 2-10, 2003 will be useful to
people working in related areas of mathematics and will become
standard references on these topics.
The volume is a coherent exposition of an active field of
current research focusing on the introduction of new methods for
the study of moduli spaces of complex structures on algebraic
surfaces, and for the investigation of symplectic topology in
dimension 4 and higher.
During that long hot summer of 1964, Ivan Smith, a Mercenary
volunteering the Arm'ee Nationale congolais, came to witness and
understand fear, the law of the jungle and the lust for killing
that permeates Africa. A member of 'Mad Mike' Hoare's 5 Commando
group, he and his companions were nominally soliders but there was
little in the way of campaigns, tactics and discipline. Of
conventional warfare there was none. Loyalty to country or unit did
not exist and fear of death was the only commander. Many more
mercenaries died from an accidental discharge, in a drunken
shoot-out or from a bullet in the back than were ever killed in
action by Simba rebels. Nearly half a century later, Ivan Smith
re-lives the nightmare that was the Congo.
Children and young people have much to offer the community they
live in, but are often excluded in decisions and policies that
affect their development, as their own opinions are ignored or
overruled much of the time. Participatory approaches used in
development in a practical framework can provide the vehicle needed
to include children in the decision-making processes which affect
their communities, and can have far reaching implications for
policies and practice.;This text presents the key issues and
challenges involved in facilitating children and young people's
participation in the development process. The contributors come
from a range of backgrounds including NGOs in development,
children's agencies, academic institutions and governments,
bringing a multi-disciplinary approach to children's
participation.;Chapter One provides an overview to the main issues
and concepts, and chapters Two to Seven each expand on a particular
theme, drawing on case studies from around the world. The main
issues discussed and analyzed include: the ethical dilemmas that
face professionals in addressing children's participation; the
process and methods used in participatory research and planning
with children; the inter-relationship between culture and
children's participation; consideration for institutions; and the
key qualities of a participation programme for children and young
people's participation.
This is the story of one man's service in the British South Africa
Police of Rhodesia during his service of nearly fifteen years,
between the years 1965 and 1979, and in many ways forms a sequel to
the author's book Mad Dog Killers. The struggle to keep Rhodesia
out of black nationalist hands started in late 1964 and ended with
the Mugabe regime in 1982. It is also a story of a policeman
engaged in that war as a member of the paramilitary BSAP Support
unit, the Police Anti-Terrorist Unit and as an ordinary member of
the force that had always been designated the country's first line
of defence. Most of the service was on remote rural district
stations, often in the middle of the"front line". The account tells
of one man's learning to be a policeman and a police public
prosecutor and about the eccentricities of some of the circuit
magistrates. A policeman has a lot to learn about life, and in the
BSA Police he was expected to jump in at the deep end from the
start. It is also the story of the strange struggle by
Rhodesian-born policemen in a force where the majority were
English-born, at a time when Rhodesia was in rebellion against
Britain. The author's senior officers, though fiercely loyal to the
force, were British and required to join the rebellion. It tells of
his resentment at the lack of drive by senior officers in the fight
against terrorist atrocities. There is additional insight into the
Utopian life in Rhodesia, especially in rural areas, when it was
still possible to hunt buck for the police mess rations, where
there was no electricity or other modern amenities and where the
single quarters were in ancient buildings enclosed by a wraparound
gauzed-in veranda - a life gone now forever. It is also a story of
a young man who grew up in Salisbury, his sexual excesses and
sadness. The British Queen Mother was patron of the force all her
life and was very proud of her association with it.
In his counseling work, Harold Ivan Smith has heard all the
questions - even the most obscure, personal, and difficult ones -
that occur to grievers as they process their loss. Here, he
compiles more than 150 common questions, explores the emotions
behind them, and provides clear and forthright responses. Whether
readers find the answers they seek, new perspectives to ponder, or
comfort from knowing that others ask similar questions, this
valuable resource will guide individuals who are in the midst of
grief and those who wish to provide comfort.
Once upon a time it would have been taken for granted that a
pastor's responsibility as shepherd and 'curer of souls' would be
to be present for the griever. The Gallup Organization reported in
1997 that only one in three believe a member of the clergy could be
comforting in a time of loss; only one in four say that it is 'very
important' for a member of the clergy to be on hand when a person
is dying. Death and dying have become very secularized in this
country. Many would more likely turn to a counselor or psychologist
than a minister. Yet the hunger is there. It is the spiritual
helper who repeatedly points the griever to another perspective who
gives hope. It is the godly minister who helps grievers continue to
love and live in anticipation of reunion. When Your People Are
Grieving calls upon pastors to embrace their positions of
leadership and to be a means of grace and mercy to grievers during
trying times. In this easy-to-read book written directly to the
pastors, well-known grief specialist Harold Ivan Smith probes the
many facets of grief ministry, presenting practical advice in
dealing with one of the most challenging yet rewarding parts of
ministry in the local church. You'll learn: What family members
expect from their pastors during times of grief What you should
never say to those who have experienced loss How to equip your
congregation to care for grievers How to counsel grievers who
question the existence of God Why we no longer talk about the 'five
stages of grief' Each chapter includes a spiritual formation
exercise you can use to help grievers grow in the Lord. You'll also
find 'A Story That Will Preach' in every chapter to help you as you
strive to relate and connect with you congregation in trying times.
The death of a friend is one of the most significant but
unrecognized experiences of grief in American culture. In this
unique book, Harold Ivan Smith guides the reader to move with
rather than against the natural grief process as he explores its
many aspects, including the friending, the passing, the burying,
the mourning, the remembering, and the reconciling.
Intersections are those crossroads in life where life experiences
can draw us together and draw us closer to God. The Intersections
Small Group series helps church members integrate faith into their
daily lives as they discover Bible-based answers to questions about
common life experiences. The books are interactive, easy-to-use,
and focus on important issues shared by all members.
During that long, hot summer of 1964, Ivan Smith, a mercenary
volunteer in the Armee Nationale Congolais, came to witness and
understand fear, the law of the jungle and the lust for killing
that permeates Africa. A member of 'Mad Mike' Hoare's 5 Commando
Group, he and his companions were nominally soldiers but there was
little in the way of campaigns, tactics and discipline. Of
conventional warfare there was none. Loyalty to country or unit did
not exist and the fear of death was the only commander. Many more
mercenaries died from an accidental discharge, in a drunken
shoot-out or from a bullet in the back than were ever killed in
action by Simba rebels. Nearly half a century later, Ivan Smith
re-lives the nightmare that was the Congo. About the Author Ivan
Smith was born 1941 in Fort Victoria, Rhodesia. He grew up on a
farm before doing his national service after leaving school in
1958. After some cowboy and mining work he spent two years in
London and Copenhagen. In 1964 he signed up for a six-month
contract as a mercenary in the Congo. He joined the British South
Africa Police in 1965 and served fourteen years in the paramilitary
Support Unit and the Police Anti-Terrorist Unit during the
protracted Rhodesian 'bush war'. He emigrated to South Africa in
1984 where he worked in the security department at the University
of Cape for 16 years. A lover of hunting and fishing, he has
written for various outdoor magazines for over 40 years. He lives
in the small village of Joubertina in the Western Cape of South
Africa.
This book not only examines friendgrief from a theoretical and
clinical framework, but also Smith offers fascinating vignettes
from the lives of well-known friendgrievers such as Elton John,
Diane Sawyer, Ralph Abernathy, C. S. Lewis, Harry Truman, Tommy
Lasorda, Jimmy Carter, Fritz Mondale, Bill Clinton, Calvin Trillin,
and Alan King. The author includes moving narratives of numerous
individuals who have never gained notoriety but have become
seasoned friendgrievers.
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