"How do I forgive the church?" is an interesting question. Many
ask it. Many can't answer it. Abuse by a church leader is
horrendous and evil. It often goes outside of anything we ever
thought or imagined a pastor or church leader could do. The very
persons we thought we could trust betray by abusing.
Are you familiar with what abuse in the context of the church
looks like? Child sexual abuse, sexual assault, physical and
emotional abuse, breaching confidentiality, undue influence, fraud,
defamation, and clergy malpractice are some examples. When trust is
betrayed because of wrongful behavior by a church leader,
confusion, harm, and anger set in.
Faced with the effects of abuse, a victim is torn about how to
recover and heal. Sleepless nights, fears, anxiety, depression,
self-esteem issues, fatigue, low energy, and irritability are all
common symptoms of abuse. Because of the abuse, relationship
issues, fears of intimacy, family problems, and shame are thrust
into the victim's life and she struggles with how to handle the
problems. Pair that up with the abuser being a church leader, and
the entire process for recovery, healing, and forgiveness exceeds
most people's understanding. Life that was once simple and good now
becomes something that is nearly impossible to handle.
"Forgiving the Church" helps church leaders, church members, and
faith communities understand what abuse looks like and how churches
have a responsibility to help victims forgive. It provides stories
and examples of how the church abuses and gives ideas for how to
help victims begin the process of forgiveness. Although it is the
victim's responsibility to forgive, the church should take specific
actions to help ensure a greater possibility that the victim can
begin the forgiveness process.
Church leaders, this book will help you understand abuse in the
church and what you should do to help victims begin the process of
forgiveness. Victims, this book will help you begin to understand
how you can start the forgiveness process when you've been abused
by the church.
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