If you wouldn't "dream" of ever reading a zombie book, Zombie Candy
might be for you.
Did you ever get the feeling your partner changed overnight with
no warning? Research shows this befalls women much more often than
men. You stand there thinking, I have to spend the next thirty
years with this moron? Fact is, there are 10 sure signs you're
married to a zombie.
He gives short guttural answers like "I dunno," or "Unh uh," when
you'd like to have a conversation. The TV is more important to him
than listening to you. MUCH more important. He consults his iPhone
repeatedly during meals. When he gets home from work, too tired to
talk, he just wants a beer. He doesn't come home from work till
late, and claims his phone was dead. He criticizes your cooking by
putting cilantro (or hot sauce, or pepper) on everything you serve.
He falls asleep during lovemaking, just when you're about to start
feeling something. If you want to watch a movie together, you have
to sit through his zombie movies. He thinks it's normal to watch
them again and again. He flatly refuses to watch romantic movies.
10. He doesn't even notice your new clothes, shoes or hairstyle,
much less say anything nice about them.
Zombie Candy is a case study of the modern zombified husband. Note
to zombie freaks: there are NO REAL ZOMBIES in this book. Note to
lovers of a good satire, with elements of mystery, and the romance
of a vacation in beautiful Tuscany, you will be entertained.
As a professional cook who gives cooking classes, Candace is
highly offended when her husband Larry sprinkles fresh cilantro on
her culinary creations. But that's nothing compared to Candace's
shock at finding a small black bra while unpacking a suitcase from
Larry's last business trip. A bra that's far too small to be hers.
It turns out Larry's a serial cheater.
Candace confronts Larry and deals with his betrayal in a uniquely
creative way, using his fixation with zombies. Aided by her best
friend, Annie Ogden, Candace sets up the ruse of the century in a
picturesque hilltop town in Italy, luring Larry there and torturing
him in a way that's a tad juvenile and cruel, but wickedly
SATISFYING.
The solution to all the problems listed above is to sit down and
talk together, but if he's so far gone he won't talk despite all
your begging and pleading? The way Candace handles it might not be
every woman's cup of tea, but it ultimately cures Larry. Might be
worth looking into ... ZOMBIE CANDY
Praise for Zombie Candy
"With action that takes us from the suburbs of Chicago to the
forests of Tuscany, and lessons in Italian cooking and zombie
movies along the way, Zombie Candy is a recipe for delicious fun.
Just go easy on the cilantro."
Chris Jay Becker Author of Death in the Fast Lane (A King Leary
Crime Novel)
"Zombie Candy is a tasty morsel of revenge, regret, renewal,
friendship and love with a zombie invasion that's as good and fun
as a box of Good & Plenty."
Lynn Messina Author of The Girl's Guide to Dating Zombies
"This book has all the ingredients of a perfect noir comedy - well
formed characters, international locations, a fast moving plot with
no brakes, and of course zombies. Revenge is a dish best served
cold - and as a betrayed wife, master chef and cookery instructor,
Candace cooks up the perfect recipe for the ultimate gazpacho."
Emma Calin Author of Knockout (A Passionate Police Romance)
General
Imprint: |
Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
|
Country of origin: |
United States |
Release date: |
May 2012 |
First published: |
May 2012 |
Authors: |
Frederick Lee Brooke
|
Dimensions: |
229 x 152 x 14mm (L x W x T) |
Format: |
Paperback - Trade
|
Pages: |
258 |
ISBN-13: |
978-1-4774-9140-9 |
Categories: |
Books >
Fiction >
Genre fiction >
Crime & mystery >
General
Promotions
|
LSN: |
1-4774-9140-6 |
Barcode: |
9781477491409 |
Is the information for this product incomplete, wrong or inappropriate?
Let us know about it.
Does this product have an incorrect or missing image?
Send us a new image.
Is this product missing categories?
Add more categories.
Review This Product
No reviews yet - be the first to create one!