A biography of the metrosexual. By his dad. Back in the
flaky-skinned early Nineties Mark Simpson predicted the future of
men was metrosexual. A couple of decades on even he's shocked by
what hussies today's males have become - and the shameless, fatal
Jersey Shore that masculinity has washed up on. In Metrosexy
Simpson collects together his essays chronicling the emergence from
his walk-in closet of man's desire to be desired. And just how
terrifyingly insatiable it turned out to be. He takes a long look
at men that long to be looked at, from metrosexual poster boy David
Beckham to Daniel Craig's flagrantly tarty, busty James Bond and
concludes that the masculine aesthetic revolution is only just
beginning to get into its sashay. "Contrary to what you've been
told," says Simpson, "metrosexuality is not about flip-flops and
facials, man-bags or manscara. Or about men becoming 'girlie' or
'gay'. It's about men becoming everything. To themselves. In much
the way that women have been for some time. It's the end of the
sexual division of bathroom and bedroom labour. It's the end of
sexuality as we've known it." In fact, metrosexuality is already so
mainstream - so normal - it now has to go hardcore to attract our
attention. So say hello to 'sporno', "where sport and porn get into
bed while Mr Armani takes pictures." More fun-packed than Beck's
bulging briefs, The Situation's six-pack, or Ronaldo's ego,
Metrosexy will leave you gasping and giggling and gagging for more.
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