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Books > Social sciences > Sociology, social studies > Social issues
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Playing Pygmalion - How People Create One Another (Paperback)
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Playing Pygmalion - How People Create One Another (Paperback)
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Like Pygmalion with his Galatea, we create the characters of people
in our lives. Although others appear to us to be who they just
'are', there are complicated psychological processes, outside of
our awareness, that lead us to experience people in ways that we
ourselves construct. Psychoanalytic theory offers a wealth of
understanding of how people unconsciously create what they both
need and dread. But these processes are not well understood by most
therapists. Too often, therapists join their patients in
overlooking their own role in creating the relationships in their
lives, such that it seems that patients were simply unfortunate to
'have' an un-giving mother or to 'find' an unloving spouse. Because
processes of creation in relationship are largely unconscious, they
are much harder to see. As a result, most theorists of
relationships acknowledge that they exist, but offer little
language or explication for how they unfold or manifest themselves.
Playing Pygmalion is an effort to trace in psychological terms the
subtle interplay by which people create the other. This book adapts
the psychoanalytic concepts of transitional object usage and
projective identification to show their importance and
applicability beyond the therapeutic situation to the understanding
of people's relational lives. Using examples from literature, film
and clinical work to illustrate the theory, the book goes on to
consider in depth the relationship narratives of four pairs of
ordinary people to demonstrate how people unconsciously 'create'
one another. The stories demonstrate that the 'other' is always
more than one conceives him or her to be. Readers inevitably
rethink some of their important relationships in terms of how they
are creating people or being created by them. This may lead them to
take in other aspects of the person, to see how they are looking
very selectively at a human being who exists beyond their
relationship. These stories also provide cautionary tales to
therapists who begin to believe in the simple reality of their
patients' constructions of important people in their lives.
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