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A staggering memoir from New York Times-bestselling author Ada
Calhoun tracing her fraught relationship with her father and their
shared obsession with a great poetWhen Ada Calhoun stumbled upon
old cassette tapes of interviews her father, celebrated art critic
Peter Schjeldahl, had conducted for his never-completed biography
of poet Frank O'Hara, she set out to finish the book her father had
started forty years earlier. As a lifelong O'Hara fan who grew up
amid his bohemian cohort in the East Village, Calhoun thought the
project would be easy, even fun, but the deeper she dove, the more
she had to face not just O'Hara's past, but also her father's, and
her own. The result is a groundbreaking and kaleidoscopic memoir
that weaves compelling literary history with a moving, honest, and
tender story of a complicated father-daughter bond. Also a Poet
explores what happens when we want to do better than our parents,
yet fear what that might cost us; when we seek their approval, yet
mistrust it. In reckoning with her unique heritage, as well as
providing new insights into the life of one of our most important
poets, Calhoun offers a brave and hopeful meditation on parents and
children, artistic ambition, and the complexities of what we leave
behind.
Inspired by her wildly popular The New York Times essay "The
Wedding Toast I'll Never Give", Ada Calhoun provides a funny (but
not flip), clever (but not smug) take on the institution of
marriage. Weaving intimate moments from her own married life with
frank insight from experts, clergy and friends, she upends
expectations of total marital bliss to present a realistic-but
ultimately optimistic-portrait of what marriage is really like.
There will be fights, there will be existential angst, there may
even be affairs; sometimes you'll look at the person you love and
feel nothing but rage. Despite it all, Calhoun contends, staying
married is easy: just don't get divorced. Wedding Toasts I'll Never
Give offers bracing straight talk to the newly married and honours
those who have weathered the storm. This exploration of modern
marriage is at once wise and entertaining, a work of unexpected
candour and literary grace.
A generation-defining exploration of the new midlife crisis facing
Gen X women and the unique circumstances that have brought them to
this point, Why We Can't Sleep is a lively successor to Passages by
Gail Sheehy and The Defining Decade by Meg Jay When Ada Calhoun
found herself in the throes of a midlife crisis, she thought that
she had no right to complain. She was married with children and a
good career. So why did she feel miserable? And why did it seem
that other Generation X women were miserable, too? Calhoun decided
to find some answers. She looked into housing costs, HR trends,
credit card debt averages, and divorce data. At every turn, she saw
a pattern: sandwiched between the Boomers and the Millennials, Gen
X women were facing new problems as they entered middle age,
problems that were being largely overlooked. Speaking with women
across America about their experiences as the generation raised to
"have it all," Calhoun found that most were exhausted, terrified
about money, under-employed, and overwhelmed. Instead of being
heard, they were told instead to lean in, take "me-time," or make a
chore chart to get their lives and homes in order. In Why We Can't
Sleep, Calhoun opens up the cultural and political contexts of Gen
X's predicament and offers solutions for how to pull oneself out of
the abyss--and keep the next generation of women from falling in.
The result is reassuring, empowering, and essential reading for all
middle-aged women, and anyone who hopes to understand them.
St. Marks Place in New York City has spawned countless artistic and
political movements. Here Frank O'Hara caroused, Emma Goldman
plotted and the Velvet Underground wailed. Ada Calhoun tells the
"Fascinating" (Village Voice) many-layered history of the
street-from its beginnings as a pear orchard to today's hipster
playground-organised around the pivotal moments when critics
declared "St. Marks is dead". In this "timely, provocative, and
stylishly written book." (The Atlantic), enriched by interviews and
rare images, Calhoun profiles iconic characters from W.H. Auden to
Abbie Hoffman, from Keith Haring to the Beastie Boys. St. Marks has
variously been an elite address, an immigrants' haven, a mafia
warzone, a hippie paradise and a backdrop to the film Kids-but it
has always been a place that outsiders call home.
A generation-defining exploration of the new midlife crisis facing
Gen X women and the unique circumstances that have brought them to
this point, Why We Can't Sleep is a lively successor to Passages by
Gail Sheehy and The Defining Decade by Meg Jay. When Ada Calhoun
found herself in the throes of a midlife crisis, she thought that
she had no right to complain. She was married with children and a
good career. So why did she feel miserable? And why did it seem
that other Generation X women were miserable, too? Calhoun decided
to find some answers. She looked into housing costs, HR trends,
credit card debt averages, and divorce data. At every turn, she saw
a pattern: sandwiched between the Boomers and the Millennials, Gen
X women were facing new problems as they entered middle age,
problems that were being largely overlooked. Speaking with women
across America about their experiences as the generation raised to
"have it all," Calhoun found that most were exhausted, terrified
about money, under-employed, and overwhelmed. Instead of being
heard, they were told instead to lean in, take "me-time," or make a
chore chart to get their lives and homes in order. In Why We Can't
Sleep, Calhoun opens up the cultural and political contexts of Gen
X's predicament and offers solutions for how to pull oneself out of
the abyss--and keep the next generation of women from falling in.
The result is reassuring, empowering, and essential reading for all
middle-aged women, and anyone who hopes to understand them.
Inspired by her wildly popular The New York Times essay "The
Wedding Toast I'll Never Give", Ada Calhoun provides a funny (but
not flip), clever (but not smug) take on the institution of
marriage. Weaving intimate moments from her own married life with
frank insight from experts, clergy and friends, she upends
expectations of total marital bliss to present a realistic-but
ultimately optimistic-portrait of what marriage is really like.
There will be fights, there will be existential angst, there may
even be affairs; sometimes you'll look at the person you love and
feel nothing but rage. Despite it all, Calhoun contends, staying
married is easy: just don't get divorced. Wedding Toasts I'll Never
Give offers bracing straight talk to the newly married and honours
those who have weathered the storm. This exploration of modern
marriage is at once wise and entertaining, a work of unexpected
candour and literary grace.
When Ada Calhoun found herself in the throes of a midlife crisis,
she thought that she had no right to complain. She was married with
children and a good career. So why did she feel miserable? And why
did it seem that other Generation X women were miserable, too?
Calhoun decided to find some answers. She looked into housing
costs, HR trends, credit card debt averages and divorce data. At
every turn, she saw a pattern: sandwiched between the Boomers and
the Millennials, Gen X women were facing new problems as they
entered middle age, problems that were being largely overlooked.
Speaking with women across America about their experiences as the
generation raised to 'have it all,' Calhoun found that most were
exhausted, terrified about money, under-employed, and overwhelmed.
Instead of their issues being heard, they were told instead to lean
in, take 'me-time' or make a chore chart to get their lives and
homes in order. In Why We Can't Sleep, Calhoun opens up the
cultural and political contexts of Gen X's predicament and offers
solutions for how to pull oneself out of the abyss - and keep the
next generation of women from falling in. The result is reassuring,
empowering and essential reading for all middle-aged women, and
anyone who hopes to understand them.
"
Abandon your insecurities. Trust your instincts. Enjoy raising a
happy, considerate child.
"
SMART CHILDREARING SENSE FROM THE FOUNDING EDITOR-IN-CHIEF OF
BABBLE.COM
What's the right way to parent? Any playground or online message
board will supply as many opinions as there are adults. Every
subject--from sleep training to time-outs to pacifiers--has its
supporters and detractors, and every viewpoint can be backed up by
a truckload of research and statistics.
It's enough to reduce any new parent to tears, but you "can "end
the madness. Ada Calhoun--a young mother as well as the founding
editor-in-chief of Babble .com--provides a complete and completely
reassuring guide that will calm your fears and make those precious
early years a source of joy. Her simple yet profound advice: find
what works for you and your family and ditch the anxiety and
judgment.
Despite what other parenting books--and other parents--might have
you believe, there is no universal "best." Whether you start solids
at four months or eight, whether you co-sleep or Ferberize, whether
Junior's mac 'n' cheese is Day-Glo orange or 100 percent organic is
not nearly as important as providing the few absolute essentials
(love, food, shelter) while teaching your little one how to be a
kind, responsible human being. With its compelling mixture of
entertaining, hilarious firsthand accounts and refreshing common
sense, "Instinctive Parenting "will show you how to do that--and
even show you how to retain your sanity, your friends, your sense
of humor, and your personal life in the process.
When Ada Calhoun found herself in the throes of a midlife crisis,
she thought that she had no right to complain. She was married with
children and a good career. So why did she feel miserable? And why
did it seem that other Generation X women were miserable, too?
Calhoun decided to find some answers. She looked into housing
costs, HR trends, credit card debt averages and divorce data. At
every turn, she saw a pattern: sandwiched between the Boomers and
the Millennials, Gen X women were facing new problems as they
entered middle age, problems that were being largely overlooked.
Speaking with women across America about their experiences as the
generation raised to 'have it all,' Calhoun found that most were
exhausted, terrified about money, under-employed, and overwhelmed.
Instead of their issues being heard, they were told instead to lean
in, take 'me-time' or make a chore chart to get their lives and
homes in order. In Why We Can't Sleep, Calhoun opens up the
cultural and political contexts of Gen X's predicament and offers
solutions for how to pull oneself out of the abyss - and keep the
next generation of women from falling in. The result is reassuring,
empowering and essential reading for all middle-aged women, and
anyone who hopes to understand them.
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