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Showing 1 - 25 of
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The Wild Woods (Hardcover)
Jamie Thomson; Illustrated by Mattia Simone; Contributions by Dave Morris
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R777
Discovery Miles 7 770
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Ships in 12 - 17 working days
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Winner of the 2012 Roald Dahl Funny Prize! Thirteen-year-old
schoolboy, Dirk Lloyd, has a dark secret - in fact he is a dark
secret. Dirk - according to his own account - is the earthly
incarnation of a Dark Lord, supreme ruler of the Darklands and
leader of great armies of orcs and warriors, intent on destruction
and bloody devastation. Following a colossal final battle between
the forces of good and evil, the Dark Lord was defeated and hurled
by his arch-foe's spells into the Pit of Uttermost Despair. At the
bottom of the Pit lies...a supermarket car park in the municipal
town of Whiteshields, somewhere in modern day England. And when he
is found, and tries to explain that he is the Dark Lord, people
think he means Dirk Lloyd. The fact that he's trapped in the puny
body of a schoolboy doesn't help. And so begins Dirk's battle to
recover his dignity, his power, and his lands... Along the way he
faces the inconvenience of being fostered by a do-gooding family,
the Purejoies; the torture of endless hours of drudgery at the
Whiteshields Brainwashing Centre (aka school); a vengeful
Headmaster; two interfering Psychotic Persecutors
(psychotherapists); and constant laughter and disrespect when he
attempts to marshall his lackeys and lickspittles (friends) to do
what he wants them to. Dirk makes friends with the son of his
foster family, Christopher, and the local Goth Girl, Sooz, and
together they attempt to cast a spell that will transport Dirk back
to his homeland. Inevitably, not everything goes to plan... But
that's for book 2 Roald Dahl Prize winner, 2012.
A choose-your-own-adventure style gamebook that gives the reader a
choice of different quests and adventures. The book is open-ended
and provides an almost unlimited number of plot lines. You can be a
warrior, explorer, priest, wizard, thief or bard. The books in the
series are inter-connected, allowing you to travel all across the
Fabled Lands. In this volume you get to sail over the oceans,
experiencing fantastic adventures to rival those of Odysseus, Jason
and Sinbad.
Dirk Lloyd, the Dark Lord trapped in the body of a weedy schoolboy,
returns in another darkly hilarious adventure... Brilliantly funny
and subversive, this is the Funny Prize-winning Jamie Thomson at
his best. Fear me, o miserable worm! I, the Great Dirk, take up my
pen once more to record the utter misery that is SCHOOL. My sworn
enemy, Hasdruban the White, has infiltrated Whiteshields School and
seeks vengeance on me. Naturally, I will triumph. But it is the
Dirkest Hour indeed... BUY THIS BOOK OR SUFFER ONE OF THE
FOLLOWING: -Being struck with a Blast of Ravening Flame -Banishment
to the Slave Pits of Never Ending Toil -Torment by the Hewer of
Limbs THE CHOICE IS YOURS. MWA HA HA!
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