Hundreds of silly jokes on every topic you can think of! What's the difference between an elephant and a biscuit? You can't dunk an elephant in your tea. Why did the monster get good marks in his exam? Because two heads are better than one. What do you call a woman with a tortoise on her head? Shelley.

Perfect for football fans who like a good giggle, Football Jokes is filled with hundreds of the most hilarious football jokes around! With funny illustrations by Jane Eccles, young footie fanatics will be laughing through those all-important World Cup games, Premier League matches and European Cup finals. When is a footballer like a baby? When he dribbles. Who's in goal when the ghost team plays football? The ghoulie, of course Why is a football crowd learning to sing like a person opening a tin of sardines? They both have trouble with the key. How can a footballer stop his nose running? Put out a foot and trip it up.

Roald Dahl's Goldilocks and the Three Bears, a Roald Dahl musical for schools, joins the famously infamous Snow-White and the Seven Dwarfs and the very smelly but loveable Jack and the Beanstalk plus many more in a glittering line up of wickedly funny productions which children and audiences just love. On trial for her crimes, Goldilocks looks like the sweet little innocent who'd give us her last sweetie. Could she really be the brazen crook who stole the porridge from under the snouts of the self-respecting, harmless Bears? The Jury will decide (but who will have the last laugh?). Let the trial commence! As with every one of these great Roald Dahl musicals, Goldilocks is based on an orchestral commission by the Roald Dahl Foundation. The concert work, from which the schools' musical is derived is by Kurt Schwertsik, and schools can use the extracts provided from the orchestral work to enhance their performances. To present a public performance of this musical you will need a performance licence. Simply email [email protected] or phone 01484 668 148 and request a Performance Licence Application Form.

This entertaining volume of verse for the very young is the perfect introduction to poetry. It includes poems about everything that is important to children: animals, family, food - and some very good jokes. Jane Eccles' humorous and wacky illustrations perfectly complement this lively and amusing collection. Complete with Audio CD to aid independent reading.