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It's the age-old tale of boy meets alien abductor. Boy meets
stun-gun. Boy learns he's the only one who can save the Earth from
Extreme World Makeover by interstellar landlords. Yeah: he thinks
it's a bit much, too. Like everyone else on his planet, Bertram
Ludlow hasn't paid much attention to fluctuations in the
intergalactic real estate market. But as a cognitive psychology
grad student, he has given some thought to what a complete mental
breakdown looks like. And this is pretty close. Now he's
discovering space is a mad and mind-boggling place where
interspecies communication rests on the power of a gumball. Where
androids demand better work/life balance. Where crime is Art,
technology still has its bugs, and lasers don't actually go
"pyew-pyew." It's also surprisingly easy to get on the Universe's
Most Wanted list. So with the weight of the world on his shoulders
and the cosmic law on his tail, can Bertram outrun, outwit and
out-bid to save the Earthling squatters from one spaced-out
redevelopment plan?
Life in the Greater Communicating Universe isn't easy. But "death"
now that has its perks.
For Rollie Tsmorlood, escaping a prison planet that no one ever
survives... well, it's more than a smart lifestyle choice. It's the
perfect chance to unleash some covert revenge.
But when someone steals the number three for ransom, suddenly
Rollie's not the only one looking for justice. Universal systems
have ground to a halt. A third of the universe is trapped in a
mysterious viral field. Even the Earth's stuck in a looky-no-touchy
zone.
Add to this, Rollie's beloved ship has been sold for space
salvage, and what's an industrious dead man to do?
Earthling pal Bertram Ludlow knows. He's learned a lot since
ducking death himself. He's discovered the thrill of second
chances, the power of cold, hard cash... and he's more than certain
his planet's endured enough.
Soon, Rollie and Bertram are caught up in a confounding case of
cosmic conspiracy, two-faced dames, hot pursuit and lukewarm
vending machine seafood.
Can Rollie and Bertram track down the numeroterrorist, free the
GCU and rescue Rollie's greatest nemesis... before their own
numbers are up?
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