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First published in 1985. The dual-career family is emerging as the
modal family form in the United States. Yet, despite its
prevalence, traditional orientations and social institutions have
not adapted to this pattern. This volume reports the results of a
pioneering investigation of men in dual-career families and
considers interventions at the societal and individual level that
will ease the difficulties associated with the transition to this
new family form.
I realize more and more that to some degree psychol ogists study
their own lives. My first studies in the mid-1970s looked at the
conflicts that emerge in dual career couples as the partners
combine their various roles. Ideas for the early studies initially
came from con versations with clients, friends, and people I met
trav eling. Soon after the topic of dual careers came up, dis
cussions of guilt and frustration followed. The partici pants in my
first studies turned out to be predominantly women. Men expressed
little interest in participating. A common response was, "Talk to
my wife. " 7 8 PREFACE Ostensibly, husbands saw their partners, but
not themselves, as dealing with conflicting roles. Although I
presumed this to be somewhat true, I knew from ob serving my own
husband that my having a career had an immeasurable impact on him.
Were men denying something? Were women overly sensitive?
Discussions with my husband, which helped me to get a better grasp
on what male partners might be feeling, planted the seed for my
subsequent book on men in dual-career 1 families, published in
1985. In gathering material for that book, I was struck by the
contrast with men's ear lier disinterest. Husbands appeared eager
to talk about their lives. Their greatest concern-what happens to
the children?-became the focus of my last set of studies. Why this
book? "Sharing it all" symbolizes the es sence of a two-career
marriage."
Gender is still largely ignored as an "active" variable in
counseling and is typically viewed as pertaining to women's issues
or problems. The field has leap-frogged over gender, perhaps
because it is too complex, perhaps because we resist change, or
perhaps because our gender socialization is sufficiently effective
as is. This book makes clear as to why gender must be considered in
understanding the client's concerns, the process of therapy, and
the counselor's role in the therapeutic interaction. Effective
therapy requires an understanding of gender theory and gender
processes. The approach taken in this book explains complex
concepts in understandable terms, provides summaries of pertinent
research findings, and applies theory and research about gender to
client case examples. Counselors, psychotherapists, school
psychologists, therapists.
Can a woman and a man, both of whom are career-oriented, achieve a
loving and enduring relationship with children and also advance in
their careers? Why is it that women more often than men push for
dual-career marriages? What personal and societal difficulties and
obstacles do they face? What special difficulties do men experience
as a result of this phenomenon? Taking us to the frontier of close
relationships--where traditional gender roles are being reevaluated
in light of what is both functional and optimal for persons in
dual-career partnerships--Two Careers / One Family describes the
current world of women and men trying to negotiate new realities at
home and at work. It offers a glimpse of the future and the
potential that exists for creative restructuring of our concepts of
gender. The first part of this unusual and compelling volume
describes the societal context of young adults today; the second
addresses, in detail, both expectations for and realities of
dual-career family life. In the final section, the author makes
predictions about the benefits of increased gender equity for
same-sex and heterosexual dual-career couples and identifies
continuing obstacles and sources of stress for partners in
dual-career families. Stimulating, informative, and insightful,
this volume is especially helpful to students and professionals in
close relationships, gender studies, family studies, psychology,
communication, counseling/clinical psychology, social work, and
sociology. "It is Lucia Albino Gilbert's recognition of the
complexities of the dual-career situation; the interrelations
between family, work, and society; and the influence of theory on
the very research questions being framed that make Two Careers/One
Family: The Promise of Gender Equality more than a summary of
current research data. Although Gilbert's own research focuses on
the family and career choices of young adults, the book reaches far
beyond that topic to place the dual-career family into historical,
philosophical, and societal contexts. . . . This brief but
comprehensive book would be of interest to any scholar of gender or
family issues, whether in psychology, sociology, communications, or
women's studies. Gilbert's readable style and useful chapter
summaries also make it suitable as a supplementary text for
advanced classes." --Contemporary Psychology "The inclusion of a
discussion of what trends in dual-career families may mean for
same-sex couples is particularly noteworthy. Family professionals,
students, and interested lay people should all find this book
valuable. It is both well-written and successful in providing a
meaningful summary of what we currently know about dual-career
families." --Family Relations "It wasn't until after my neighbor
and I (he's a nationally known constitutional lawyer) got into a
discussion of which detergents we preferred when doing the
families' laundries that I realized how profoundly some parts of
society are changing. We had often talked about feminist aspects of
civil rights legislation, but it was the laundry detergent
discussion that did it. Now Lucia Gilbert chronicles the changes we
and our children face. Gilbert's Two Careers/One Family is a
dramatic and graceful description of the emergence of the
two-career family form. Gilbert covers it all--theory and research,
history and future prospects, female and male views, and more.
During '93, the media will be preoccupied with the 'Hillary
question,' but in the meantime change marches on. Read Two
Careers/One Family to understand not just this year's media fuss,
but what's in store for close relationships in the coming years."
--Milton D. Hakel, Bowling Green State University, Ohio "In this
volume, Gilbert describes--and astutely analyzes--the interplay
between work and family in the lives of dual career couples. She
looks at this in terms of the past, the present, and the future, as
well as from the perspective of the individual, the family, the
work organization, and society as a whole. I cannot think of anyone
better qualified for this task than Lucia Gilbert. Her analysis
blends her experiences as a counseling psychologist with her skills
as a researcher and scholar. . . . Her experiences as a counseling
psychologist give the book a valuable richness and compassion for
each individual's situation. Her experience as a scholar, one who
has been a leader on this topic since the early '80s, serves as a
solid foundation on which Gilbert paints an up-to-date empirical
portrait of dual career couples with rigor, breadth, and balance. .
. . Gilbert's writing is well-organized, concise, and lucid.
Sprinkled throughout the text are well-selected excerpts from other
sources, cartoons, and informative figures and tables. Combining
sensitivity with rationality, her writing epitomizes an androgynous
style." --Daniel Perlman, The University of British Columbia "For
psychologists, personal relationships scholars, women's or family
studies experts already familiar with this body of knowledge,
Gilbert describes the conceptual shift in the focus of
sociopsychological inquiry from sex, as a biological difference, to
gender, as a socially constructed difference. She casts her
analysis in terms of the new 'gender as socially constructed
difference' perspective, emphasizing gender as an organizing
feature of our lives and as a social process." --Daniel Perlman,
The University of British Columbia "This book offers a wealth of
information and understanding of gender issues. The implications
are mind-boggling in terms of potential for relationship and power
shifts between wives and husbands, between women and men--at home,
in the workplace, in larger social spheres--, for shifts in
child-parent roles and relationships, and for new parental role
models. It is rich in detail, appealing in lucidity and compassion,
and delightfully entertaining in sprinkles of humor that sparkle
and nip." --Earl Koile, Professor Emeritus, University of Texas at
Austin "I enjoyed reading this book. By placing the dual-career
family literature firmly within a framework of gender dynamics, it
goes much further than just chronicling the problems faced by
dual-career spouses. It also offers explanations and the vision of
a way forward. The tone is optimistic, while in no way
underestimating the hurdles to be overcome in the path to gender
equality. The book also broadens the scope of the discussion to
include same-sex dual-career relationships, who have so long been
overlooked by researchers studying work and family. The author
demonstrates that they too can benefit from the progress being made
by heterosexual couples at home and at work. The lifetime
perspective on dual-career relationships, together with the book's
accessible style, and some delightful hard-hitting cartoons, should
make in invaluable reading for anyone contemplating a dual-career
relationship, as well as an academic readership." --Suzan Lewis,
Manchester Metropolitan University "Lucia Gilbert's Two Careers/One
Family is a thorough and current discussion of today's two-career
families. The book is energetic and insightful in its review of
social science research on these families, including the author's
own research. The gender analysis is sophisticated. This book is
important reading for those interested in the psychology of gender
or the psychology of work and work/family issues." --Janet Shibley
Hyde, Ph.D., University of Wisconsin
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