An anthropologist and his daughter travel to Kermunkachunk, the capital of Chalazia, to conduct research for an ethnography on the Chalazian Mafia Faction (a splinter group of the Chalazian Children's Theater). The book takes place over the course of a night at the Bar Pulpo, Kermunkachunk's #1 spoken-word karaoke bar. Moreover, it's Thursday, "Father/Daughter Nite," when the bar is frequented by actual fathers and daughters as well as couples cosplaying fathers and daughters. Somehow emanating from the letters on an optometrist's eye chart, from karaoke screens in the bar, and from posters on a piazza that's the scene of phantasmagorical and unending mob wars, Last Orgy of the Divine Hermit relentlessly pulls the rug out from under itself, leaving you suspended in a state of perpetual exhilaration. Leyner, one of the most blazingly imaginative and influential writers of the last thirty years, has not only written his funniest novel, he's broken through to something entirely unprecedented. Imagine tripping on a hallucinogen made by an alien intelligence and then wanting to immediately call your dad (in this world or the next) and tell him that you love him-that's what reading Last Orgy of the Divine Hermit is like. It's a novel about the deep pleasures of reading and drinking, the tumultuous reign of a cabal of mystic mobsters, and, of course, the transcendent love of a father for his daughter. Last Orgy of the Divine Hermit is like nothing else you've ever read before.

In this fiendishly original new novel, Mark Leyner is a leather-blazer-wearing, Piranha 793-driving, narcotic-guzzling monster who has potential rivals eliminated by his bionically enhanced bodyguards, has his internal organs tattooed, and eavesdrops on the erotic fantasies of Victoria's Secret models -- which naturally revolve around him.

Leyner's jet-propelled roller derby through the cultures of celebrity, cyberpunk, and rabid egotism is exhilaratingly bizarre, exhaustingly funny -- and you'd better hope it's just fiction.

An anthropologist and his daughter travel to Kermunkachunk, the capitol of Chalazia, to conduct research for an ethnography on the Chalazian Mafia Faction (a splinter group of the Chalazian Children's Theater). The book takes place over the course of a night at the Bar Pulpo, Kermunkachunk's #1 spoken-word karaoke bar, where conversations are actually being read from multiple karaoke screens arrayed around the barroom. Moreover, it's Thursday, "Father/Daughter Nite," when the bar is frequented by actual fathers and daughters as well as couples cosplaying fathers and daughters. Last Orgy of the Divine Hermit is a book about the deep pleasures of reading and drinking, the tumultuous reign of a cabal of mystic mobsters, and, of course, the transcendent love of a father for his daughter.

High above the bustling streets of Dubai, in the world's tallest and most luxurious skyscraper, reside the gods and goddesses of the modern world. Since they emerged 14 billion years ago from a bus blaring a tune remarkably similar to the Mister Softee jingle, they've wreaked mischief and havoc on mankind. Unable to control their jealousies, the gods have splintered into several factions, led by the immortal enemies XOXO, Shanice, La Felina, Fast-Cooking Ali, and Mogul Magoo. Ike Karton, an unemployed butcher from New Jersey, is their current obsession.
Ritualistically recited by a cast of drug-addled bards, THE SUGAR FROSTED NUTSACK is Ike's epic story. A raucous tale of gods and men confronting lust, ""ambition, death, and the eternal verities, it is a wildly fun, wickedly fast gambol through the unmapped corridors of the imagination.

Hundreds of questions you'd only ask your doctor after your third martini! You know how it is... you're at a party, you've had a drink or two, and then someone introduces you to a friend. He's a doctor. And it seems like the perfect time to ask all those strange questions you've always wondered about, but never had the courage to ask: Can poppy seeds make you test positive for heroin? What are goosebumps? Why does asparagus make your wee smell? Why do old people get hairy ears? Is it possible to lose your contact lenses inside your head forever? Why do some people have an "outie" belly button and some people an "innie"? Does warm milk really help you sleep? Is it actually possible to get scared to death? This book gives the answer to these and many more questions - pretty much everything you've ever wanted to know - but never had enough Dutch courage to ask!

The Doctor Is In . . . Again!
Did the mega-bestselling "Why Do Men Have Nipples?" exhaust your curiosity about stuff odd, icky, kinky, noxious, libidinous, or just plain embarrassing? No, you say? Well, good, because the doctor and his able-bodied buddy are in! Again! Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg, M.D., now take on the differences between the sexes--those burning questions like Why doesn't my husband ever listen? or Why does my wife ALWAYS have to pee? And of course, Why do men fall asleep after sex?, plus plenty of others to keep you fully informed.
Full of smart and funny answers to an onslaught of new questions, all in a do-ask-we'll-tell spirit that entertain and teaches you something at the same time, "Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex?" offers the real lowdown on everything everyone wants to know about all things anatomical, medical, sexual, nutritional, animal, and mineral, but would only ask a physician after a few too many, like:
- Why do you have a "bionic" sense of smell when you're pregnant?
- Does peeing in the shower cure athlete's foot?
- Is a dog's mouth clean?
- Can you breastfeed with fake boobs?
- Does thumb sucking cause buckteeth?
- Do your eyebrows grow back if shaved?
Bigger, funnier, and better than ever, "Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex?" proves that in the battle of the sexes, as in most things, a little Q&A is a safe, effective, minimally invasive remedy.

Also available as an eBook

From his cult classic, I Smell Esther Williams, to his wildly popular and insightful column "Wild Kingdom" appearing in Esquire magazine every month, Mark Leyner has been giving us up close and personal encounters of the most hilarious kind for over a decade.
Now, in his new novel The Tetherballs of Bougainville, Leyner shares with us, long last, the quintessential coming of age story that every writer, at some point, is compelled to tell. In the novel we meet young Mark Leyner, 13-years-old to be exact, as he waits in a New Jersey prison to witness his father's execution. Adolescence is never easy, and it just so happens that this junior high schooler is on deadline to turn in a screenplay for which he has already been awarded the Vincent and Lenore DiGiacomo/Oshimitsu Polymers America Award. And, as it was for all of us during out teenage years, nothing seems to go as planned.
Written as autobiography, screenplay and movie review, The Tetherballs of Bougainville twists three familiar narrative forms into an outlandishly compelling story. Leyner's use of the media-driven formats brilliantly reflects our secret, shameful and hilarious desire to experience our private lives as mass entertainment. The Tetherballs of Bougainville skewers and celebrates American pop culture in the late twentieth century. Leyner's version of our lives is so deeply funny because it is so painfully true.

"From the Hardcover edition."

Dizzyingly brilliant and raucously funny, GONE WITH THE MIND is the story of Mark Leyner's life, told as only Mark Leyner can. In this utterly unconventional novel, Leyner gives a reading in the food court of a mall. Besides Mark's mother and a few employees of fast food chain Panda Express who ask a handful of questions, the reading is completely without audience. The action of this book takes place exclusively at the food court, but the territory covered on these pages has no bounds. Existential, self-aware, and very much concerned with the relationship between a complicated mother and an even more complicated son, Leyner's story--with its bold, experimental structure--is a moving work of genius.

Is There a Doctor in the House?
Say you're at a party. You've had a martini or three, and you mingle through the crowd, wondering how long you need to stay before going out for pizza. Suddenly you're introduced to someone new, Dr. Nice Tomeetya. You forget the pizza. Now is the perfect time to bring up all those strange questions you'd like to ask during an office visit with your own doctor but haven't had the guts (or more likely the time) to do so. You're filled with liquid courage . . . now is your chance! If you've ever wanted to ask a doctor . . .
-How do people in wheelchairs have sex?
-Why do I get a killer headache when I suck down my milkshake too fast?
-Can I lose my contact lens inside my head forever?
-Why does asparagus make my pee smell?
-Why do old people grow hair on their ears?
-Is the old adage "beer before liquor, never sicker, liquor before beer . . ." really true?
. . . then "Why Do Men Have Nipples?" is the book for you.
Compiled by Billy Goldberg, an emergency medicine physician, and Mark Leyner, bestselling author and well-known satirist, "Why Do Men Have Nipples?" offers real factual and really funny answers to some of the big questions about the oddities of our bodies.

This book is fiction the brain can dance to, by one of the funniest and most subversive young writers of this or any other decade.