In this updated second edition, the author presents a sensible, easy-to-follow method for changing the course of one's relationships. Anyone who has struggled with balancing his or her own needs and desires with those of the "other" person will appreciate and benefit from the easy-to-implement suggestions. Its format combines psychoeducation, personal anecdotes, anonymous clinical case vignettes, and skills-building exercises. Working with individuals and groups on this topic of loss of self in others, author Nancy L. Johnston identifies four areas of recovery work that can help an individual cultivate a healthy self: facing Illusions, detaching, setting healthy boundaries, and developing spirituality. Emotional over-involvement in relationships can throw even otherwise well-functioning people out of balance - thoughts become focused on the other person in ways that are unhealthy for both the individual and the relationship - commonly leading to feelings of anxiety, agitation, helplessness, depression, anger, and resentment. Johnson provides a detailed description of ways to turn this self-destructive cycle around with current best practices and research data, and includes self-assessments and experiential exercises designed to address essential aspects of self-awareness, distortions in thinking, communication style and tools, and spirituality. "Disentangling" is the process of creating enough emotional space between oneself and another person in order to better see the realities of any relationship and make healthier conscious decisions about it.

In this fun, inviting look at a serious topic, codependence, Johnston shares the life lessons she learned from her observations of the relationship behaviors exhibited by her pet collie, Daisy. A delightful book that offers new and specific information so that readers can understand "What am I doing that is not producing the relationship results I really want?" New information on codependency and help for it uniquely presented within a creative and clever story. A well-rounded book that balances a lighthearted approach with informative, educational content, including the latest research findings on codependency and treatment. Examines behaviors on a continuum rather than labeling them as "good" or "bad," encouraging readers to maintain a healthy sense of self while learning to moderate codependent behaviors in a realistic, achievable way. Includes visual aids to illustrate the concepts explained in the text. The author has developed her approach to addressing codependent behaviors from her vast professional experience as a licensed counselor and substance abuse treatment practitioner, as well as her personal background in recovery from codependency. Focuses on specific behaviors associated with codependence, giving readers a clear picture of what to pay attention to in their relationships and ways of being with others and with self, and offering treatment ideas targeted to each problematic behavior.