How we address people, where we sit, what we disclose about ourselves, how we make eye contact, and where and when we touch are signs of attitudes and emotions. Because we may not be conscious of the social or psychological significance of these signs, they are the stealth aspect of conversation. One goal of this book is to demonstrate that address, self-disclosure, seating, eye-contact, and touch are the five vital signs of conversation. Another is to increase the reader's awareness of the fact that whatever the topic of a conversation, interlocutors are also expressing their attitudes and emotions by means of these five vital signs. A final goal is to show the reader that the use of these signs varies with ethnicity, gender, and relationship. To accomplish these goals, this book provides relevant scientific information in a popular style that makes it accessible to a broad spectrum of readers concerned with interpersonal communication.

How we address people, where we sit, what we disclose about ourselves, how we make eye contact, and where and when we touch are signs of attitudes and emotions. Because we may not be conscious of the social or psychological significance of these signs, they are the stealth aspect of conversation. One goal of this book is to demonstrate that address, self-disclosure, seating, eye-contact, and touch are the five vital signs of conversation. Another is to increase the reader's awareness of the fact that whatever the topic of a conversation, interlocutors are also expressing their attitudes and emotions by means of these five vital signs. A final goal is to show the reader that the use of these signs varies with ethnicity, gender, and relationship. To accomplish these goals, this book provides relevant scientific information in a popular style that makes it accessible to a broad spectrum of readers concerned with interpersonal communication.

On any given day, we engage in dozens of conversations. We exchange huge quantities of information. Yet, all too often, we miss some of the most important data present during these everyday exchanges. Seemingly inconsequential conversational behaviors, often overlooked, can convey volumes about the attitudes at work between two people. Is the boss really as much of a friend as he or she says? Is your love interest signaling that you're an equal partner or that he/she has the upper hand in the relationship? Even more important, how do you come across - as an equal or a superior? This book explores the micropolitics of conversation, in particular the five vital clues of conversation, both verbal (the words we choose and the subject matter we discuss) and nonverbal (the seat we choose and how often we make eye contact or touch).

Citing Marx's socioeconomic base/social superstructure metaphor, Norman Markel proposes that "conversation style" is a social superstructure that reproduces and reinforces a socioeconomic base. Specifically, a conversation style that is High Hierarchy and Low Solidarity mirrors the capitalist socioeconomic base and contributes to an unconscious acceptance of the idea that autocratic and alienated interpersonal relationships are human nature. This book describes the research establishing Address, Self-disclosure, Seating, Eye-Contact and Touch as the most significant behaviors communicating Hierarchy and Solidarity. The author suggests that being conscious of the meaning of these five behaviors, we are free to choose an alternate conversation style - Low Hierarchy and High Solidarity - that provides a foundation for democratic and compassionate interpersonal relationships.