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‘[A] moving, beautifully written book about love and mental
health and life’ BOB ODENKIRK ‘Fiercely intelligent, humane and
necessary’ NATHAN FILER, author of THE SHOCK OF THE FALL 'At its
heart a story about love … an astonishing new voice' ALI MILLAR,
author of THE LAST DAYS ‘I’m scared the bad people will hear me
talking to you.’ I watch him take his notebook and a marker pen
from his bag. As he zips the compartment back up I see the tip of
our large, serrated kitchen knife, the one that went missing last
night. Zach was nineteen when Tanya discovered him rerouting the
wires of their landline, sure that the phone was bugged, that his
friends were Mafia, that the helicopters swirling above were
deployed by spies, that he couldn’t trust anyone – her
included. That moment upturned and unmoored everything. It would
strand them both in a profound and terrifying isolation the way
that perhaps only a psychotic break – or loving someone who is
experiencing one – can. Zig-Zag Boy is a journey along the tough
frontiers of love and madness. As Tanya fights for answers and
understanding – coming up against broken healthcare systems in
the UK and the US – she is forced to question whether there were
warning signs she missed, whether Zach will be able to have a
normal life, and what ‘normal’ really means.
'A moving portrait of a mother's love for her son ... fiercely
intelligent, humane and necessary' NATHAN FILER, author of THE
SHOCK OF THE FALL 'At its heart a story about love ... an
astonishing new voice' ALI MILLAR, author of THE LAST DAYS 'I'm
scared the bad people will hear me talking to you.' I watch him
take his notebook and a marker pen from his bag. As he zips the
compartment back up I see the tip of our large, serrated kitchen
knife, the one that went missing last night. Zach was nineteen when
Tanya discovered him rerouting the wires of their landline, sure
that the phone was bugged, that his friends were Mafia, that the
helicopters swirling above were deployed by spies, that he couldn't
trust anyone - her included. That moment upturned and unmoored
everything. It would strand them both in a profound and terrifying
isolation the way that perhaps only a psychotic break - or loving
someone who is experiencing one - can. Zig-Zag Boy is a journey
along the tough frontiers of love and madness. As Tanya fights for
answers and understanding - coming up against broken healthcare
systems in the UK and the US - she is forced to question whether
there were warning signs she missed, whether Zach will be able to
have a normal life, and what 'normal' really means.
One night in 2009, Tanya Frank finds her nineteen-year-old son,
Zach—gentle and full of promise—in the grip of what the
psychiatrists would label a psychotic break. Suddenly and
inexplicably, Tanya is thrown into a parallel universe: Zach’s
world, where the phones are bugged, his friends have joined the
Mafia, and helicopters are spying on his family. In the years
following Zach’s shifting psychiatric diagnoses, Tanya goes to
war for her son, desperate to find the right answer, the right
drug, the right doctor to bring him back to reality. She struggles
to navigate archaic mental healthcare systems, first in California
and then in her native London during lockdown. Meanwhile, the boy
she raised—the chatty, precocious dog-lover, the teenager who
spent summers surfing with his big brother, the UCLA
student—suffers the effects of multiple hospitalizations,
powerful drugs that blunt his emotions, therapies that don’t
work, and torturous nights on the streets. Holding on to startling
moments of hope and seeking solace in nature and community, Tanya
learns how to abandon her fears for the future and accept the
mysteries of her son’s altered states. With tenderness, lyricism,
and generous candor, this compelling story conveys the power of a
mother’s love. Zig-Zag Boy is both a moving lamentation for
things lost and a brave testament to the people we become in
difficult circumstances.
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