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Attention Blackadder, Python, and Red Dwarf fans: Isambard Smith and his loyal and noble friend, the psychopathic alien headhunter, Suruk, are back in a fourth laugh-out-loud installmentIn the 25th century the future of the galaxy rests on a knife-edge. The actions of one man could save the British Space Empire or leave Earth at the mercy of deadly legions of ant-people. That one man is Captain Isambard Smith, and Earth is in a lot of trouble. After blowing up a top-secret enemy base, Space Captain Smith and his crew deserve a rest. But their holiday ends when forces unknown destroy the robot convoy they were meant to be guarding. Smith finds himself in hot pursuit of a mysterious vessel that can pass through dimensions, incurring the wrath of the dreaded Grand Witchfinder of New Eden--which would be much easier to deal with if his pilot wasn't cowering under the dashboard and his spaceship wasn't infested with man-eating toads. Meanwhile, the Empire is gathering its allies to form a united front against alien tyranny. Unfortunately, the delicate negotiations have been entrusted to Major Wainscott, a man who knows no fear and very little about diplomacy or trousers. Once again, Captain Smith must summon all his courage to unite humanity behind the Empire. His quest will take him on a journey to face his greatest fears: from the depths of space, through hell itself--and even to France.
In the 25th Century the British Space Empire thrives in Earth's corner of the Milky Way. The only threat is the gathering menace of the evil Ghast Empire whose arachnoid stormtroopers are hell bent on galactic domination and the extermination of all humanoid life. Captain Isambard Smith is the square-jawed, courageous and somewhat asinine new commander of the clapped out and battle damaged light cruiser John Pym. His entire crew comprises his trusted friend Suruk, a seven foot tusked and mandibled headhunter, his android pilot, who is secretly a fugitive sex toy, and a hamster called Gerald. Their mission is a simple one: to collect new-age herbalist Rhianna Mitchell from the laid back New Francisco orbiter and bring her back to Earth. Straightforward enough - except the Ghasts want her too and, in addition to a whole fleet of Ghast warships, Smith has to confront void sharks, a universe-weary android assassin and John Gilead, psychopathic naval officer from the fanatically religious Republic of Eden.
Tea . . . a beverage brewed from the fermented dried leaves of the shrub "Camelli sinensis "and imbibed by all the great civilizations in the galaxy's history; a source of refreshment, stimulation, and, above all else, of moral fiber"--"without which the British Space Empire must surely crumble to leave Earth at the mercy of its enemies. Sixty percent of the Empire's tea is grown on one world--Urn, principal planet of the Didcot system. If Earth is to keep fighting, the tea must flow! When a crazed cult leader overthrows the government of Urn, Isambard Smith and his vaguely competent crew find themselves saddled with new allies--a legion of tea-obsessed nomads, an overly-civilized alien horde. and a commando unit so elite that it has only five members. Only together can they defeat the self-proclaimed God Emperor of Didcot and confront the true power behind the coup--the sinister legions of the Ghast Empire and Smith's old enemy, Commander 462.
Captain Isambard Smith and his crew are back for a fifth adventure fighting alien foe in the 25th-century British Space Empire The lemming men of Yullia are rushing headlong towards the cliffs of destiny, and they intend to take the British Space Empire with them. When moral fiber clashes with lemming spirit, only one thing is certain--surrender is no longer an option. In the back-streets of Ravnavar, greatest planet of the Space Empire, revolution stirs. Someone will have to go deep undercover, take on the robot underworld, and reveal what lies behind the mysterious Popular Front. Worst of all, Major Wainscott--commando and nudist--has gone renegade in the most dangerous jungle in the galaxy. Someone will have to travel upriver, terminate Wainscott's command, and make him put some trousers on. That someone is Isambard Smith. Once more, Smith and his crew must leap into action, civilize the galaxy, and force legions of angry rodents to stop their nonsense at once. Smith is destined to topple a mighty empire. The only question is--whose empire will it be?
The empire of the ant-people is beginning to crumble. As the British Space Navy prepares to invade the Ghast home world, the Secret Service comes up with a daring plan--the assassination of Number One, the small and furious dictator of the Ghasts. Only one man has the qualities needed to take on a job this dangerous--Captain Isambard Smith. But Smith has problems of his own. Captured by the ruthless--and gormless--Criminarch of Radishia, Smith and his crew must survive the deadly sport of Hyperbowl, where it's not whether you win or lose that counts, but how you slay the game. Now Smith faces his toughest challenge yet. In order to civilize the galaxy, he will have to win a ball game, topple a dictator, and organize a party for a four-year-old. All in a day's work for a hero of the British Space Empire--although it's going to be a very busy day indeed.
From the depths of Space a new foe rises to do battle with mankind: the British Space Empire is threatened by the lemming-people of Yull, ruthless enemies who attack without mercy, fear, or any concept of self preservation. At the call of their war god, the Yull have turned on the Empire, hell-bent on conquest and destruction in their rush towards the cliffs of destiny. When the Yullian army is forced to retreat at the battle of the River Tam, the disgraced Colonel Vock swears revenge on the clan of Suruk the Slayer, Isambard Smith's homicidal alien friend. Now Smith and his crew must defend the Empire and civilize the stuffing out of a horde of bloodthirsty lemming-men--which would be easy were it not for a sinister robotics company, a Ghast general with a fondness for genetic engineering, and an ancient brotherhood of Morris Dancers--who may yet hold the key to victory.
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