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Side Affects - On Being Trans and Feeling Bad (Hardcover)
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Side Affects - On Being Trans and Feeling Bad (Hardcover)
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How the "bad feelings" of trans experience inform trans survival
and flourishing Some days-or weeks, or months, or even years-being
trans feels bad. Yet as Hil Malatino points out, there is little
space for trans people to think through, let alone speak of, these
bad feelings. Negative emotions are suspect because they unsettle
narratives of acceptance or reinforce virulently phobic framings of
trans as inauthentic and threatening. In Side Affects, Malatino
opens a new conversation about trans experience that acknowledges
the reality of feeling fatigue, envy, burnout, numbness, and rage
amid the ongoing onslaught of casual and structural transphobia in
order to map the intricate emotional terrain of trans survival.
Trans structures of feeling are frequently coded as negative on
both sides of transition. Before transition, narratives are framed
in terms of childhood trauma and being in the "wrong body."
Posttransition, trans individuals-especially trans people of
color-are subject to unrelenting transantagonism. Yet trans
individuals are discouraged from displaying or admitting to
despondency or despair. By moving these unloved feelings to the
center of trans experience, Side Affects proposes an affective
trans commons that exists outside political debates about
inclusion. Acknowledging such powerful and elided feelings as anger
and exhaustion, Malatino contends, is critical to motivating
justice-oriented advocacy and organizing-and recalibrating new
possibilities for survival and well-being.
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