We all know what it's like to be annoyed by little things that our
husband, wife or partner does - leaving the cap off the toothpaste
tube, leaving the toilet lid up, leaving dirty clothes on the floor
- and we know how easily these little grievances of everyday life
can spin out of control. In this brilliant new book the sociologist
Jean-Claude Kaufmann shows us how and why sparks can suddenly fly
even in the most well-adjusted couples.
They see themselves as being in total harmony but they are
mistaken The clash between their uniquely individual attitudes to
life rumbles on in silence until suddenly erupting in emotional
outbursts each time an object or an attitude reveals for the
thousandth time the unbearable and incomprehensible otherness of
the partner.
When this occurs, a whole panoply of tactics is deployed,
ranging from the combative (secret acts of revenge) through the
neutral (sulking) to the subtly loving. But these stormy episodes
within relationships can have a happy ending, for it is through
learning to overcome these irritations and aggravations that love
is ultimately strengthened.
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