Jonathan Jansen is die voormalige Rektor van die Universiteit van die Vrystaat, met 'n formidabele reputasie vir transformasie en 'n diepgewortelde verbintenis tot versoening in gemeenskappe wat met die erfenis van apartheid saamleef. In hierdie boek, Jansen se persoonlikste en mees intieme boek tot op hede, daag Suid-Afrika se geliefde professor die stereotipes en stigma uit wat so maklik op Kaapse Vlakte-ma's van toepassing gemaak word as luidrugtig, wellustig en sonder tande – en bied hy dié deernisvolle verhaal aan as 'n lofsang vir ma's oral wat op moeilike plekke gesinne moet grootmaak en gemeenskappe moet bou.

As jong man het Jansen gewonder hoe ma's dit regkry om kinders onder moeilike omstandighede groot te maak – en toe besef die antwoord is reg voor hom in die vorm van Sarah Jansen, sy eie ma. Deur haar vroeë lewe in Montagu en die gevolge van apartheid se gedwonge verskuiwings na te speur, werp Jansen lig op hoe sterk vroue nie slegs daarin geslaag het om gesinne bymekaar te hou nie, maar hulle kinders ook met integriteit groot te maak.

Met sy kenmerkende fynsinnigheid, humor en eerlikheid, volg Jansen sy ma se lewensverhaal as 'n jong verpleegster en ma van vyf kinders, en wys hy hoe dié ma's hulle verlede verwerk het, hulle huise ingerig het, sin gemaak het van die politiek, die liefde bestuur en kernwaardes gekommunikeer het – hoe hulle hulle lewens gelei het. Om sy eie herinneringe te balanseer, het Jansen hom op sy suster, Naomi, beroep om haar eie insigte en herinneringe te deel, en daardeur spesiale waarde tot hierdie roerende memoir toe te voeg.

Jonathan Jansen is the former Vice Chancellor of the University of the Free State, with a formidable reputation for transformation and for a deep commitment to reconciliation in communities living with the heritage of apartheid. In this, Jansen’s most personal and intimate book to date, South Africa’s beloved professor contemplates the stereotypes and stigma so readily applied to Cape Flats mothers as bawdy, lusty and gap-toothed – and offers this endearing antidote as a praise song to mothers everywhere who raise families and build communities in difficult places.

As a young man, Jansen questioned how mothers managed to raise children in trying circumstances – and then realised that the answer was right in front of him in the form of Sarah Jansen, his own mother. Tracing her early life in Montagu and the consequences of apartheid’s forced removals, Jansen unpacks how strong women managed to not only keep families together, but raise them with integrity.

With his trademark delicacy, humour and frankness, Jansen follows his mother’s life story as a young nurse and mother to five children, and shows how mothers dealt with their pasts, organised their homes, made sense of politics, managed affection, communicated core values – how they led their lives. As a balance to his own recollections, Jansen has called on his sister, Naomi, to offer her own insights and memories, adding special value to this touching personal memoir.

Can racism and intimacy co-exist? Can love and friendship form and flourish across South Africa’s imposed colour lines?

Who better to engage on the subject of hazardous liaisons than the students with whom Jonathan Jansen served over seven years as Vice Chancellor of the University of the Free State. The context is the University campus in Bloemfontein, the City of Roses, the Mississippi of South Africa. Rural, agricultural, insular, religious and conservative, this is not a place for breaking out. But over the years, Jansen observed shifts in campus life and noticed more and more openly interracial friendships and couples, and he began having conversations with these students with burning questions in mind.

Ten interracial couples tell their stories of love and friendship in their own words, with no social theories imposed on their meanings, but instead a focus on how these students experience the world of interracial relationships, and how flawed, outdated laws and customs set limits on human relationships, and the long shadow they cast on learning, living and loving on university campuses to this day.

Khamr: The Makings Of A Waterslams is a true story that maps the author’s experience of living with an alcoholic father and the direct conflict of having to perform a Muslim life that taught him that nearly everything he called home was forbidden.

A detailed account from his childhood to early adulthood, Jamil F. Khan lays bare the experience of living in a so-called middle-class Coloured home in a neighbourhood called Bernadino Heights in Kraaifontein, a suburb to the north of Cape Town. His memories are overwhelmed by the constant discord that was created by the chaos and dysfunction of his alcoholic home and a co-dependent relationship with his mother, while trying to manage the daily routine of his parents keeping up appearances and him maintaining scholastic excellence.

Khan’s memories are clear and detailed, which in turn is complemented by his scholarly thinking and analysis of those memories. He interrogates the intersections of Islam, Colouredness and the hypocrisy of respectability as well as the effect perceived class status has on these social realities in simple yet incisive language, giving the reader more than just a memoir of pain and suffering.

Khan says about his debut book: "This is not a story for the romanticisation of pain and perseverance, although it tells of overcoming many difficulties. It is a critique of secret violence in faith communities and families, and the hypocrisy that has damaged so many people still looking for a place and way to voice their trauma. This is a critique of the value placed on ritual and culture at the expense of human life and well-being, and the far-reaching consequences of systems of oppression dressed up as tradition."

A searing investigation that challenges everything you thought you knew about domestic abuse.

Domestic abuse is a national emergency: one in four Australian women has experienced violence from a man she was intimate with. But too often we ask the wrong question: why didn’t she leave? We should be asking: why did he do it?

Investigative journalist Jess Hill puts perpetrators – and the systems that enable them – in the spotlight. See What You Made Me Do is a deep dive into the abuse so many women and children experience – abuse that is often reinforced by the justice system they trust to protect them. Critically, it shows that we can drastically reduce domestic violence – not in generations to come, but today.

Combining forensic research with riveting storytelling, See What You Made Me Do radically rethinks how to confront the national crisis of fear and abuse in our homes.

A “must-read” (The Washington Post) funny and practical guide to help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams.

Have you ever looked around and wondered, “Why has everyone found love except me?” You’re not the only one. Great relationships don’t just appear in our lives—they’re the culmination of a series of decisions, including whom to date, how to end it with the wrong person, and when to commit to the right one. But our brains often get in the way. We make poor decisions, which thwart us on our quest to find lasting love.

Drawing from years of research, behavioral scientist turned dating coach Logan Ury reveals the hidden forces that cause those mistakes. But awareness on its own doesn’t lead to results. You have to actually change your behavior. Ury shows you how.

This “simple-to-use guide” (Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone) focuses on a different decision in each chapter, incorporating insights from behavioral science, original research, and real-life stories.

You’ll learn:

• What’s holding you back in dating (and how to break the pattern)
• What really matters in a long-term partner (and what really doesn’t)
• How to overcome the perils of online dating (and make the apps work for you)
• How to meet more people in real life (while doing activities you love)
• How to make dates fun again (so they stop feeling like job interviews)
• Why “the spark” is a myth (but you’ll find love anyway)

This “data-driven” (Time), step-by-step guide to relationships, complete with hands-on exercises, is designed to transform your life. How to Not Die Alone will help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams.

* What is addiction?* How do you know if someone is addicted?* Are some people more prone to addiction than others?* Are some drugs more addictive than others?* How can you help someone who doesn't want help? Understanding Drugs of Abuse is designed to bring the everyday reader face-to-face with drugs of abuse and addiction. Through frank, no-nonsense explanations of the stimulants, depressants, psychedelics, and inhalants, this accessible guide will help the reader to understand how drugs of abuse affect thinking, behavior, perceptions, and emotions. It also examines the effects addiction has on the addict's family. Understanding Drugs of Abuse demystifies the treatment process by explaining what types of treatment are available, what actually happens during treatment, and what patients and their families can expect during the treatment process. The book also describes the recovery process and will help people identify good recovery-as well as recognize poor recovery and the warning signs of relapse. Perhaps most important, Understanding Drugs of Abuse explains how friends and family can intervene when someone they love does not want help. Because the use of prescribed medications by people with substance use disorders can be misunderstood or even be dangerous, this book presents practical information about medications and recovery. It also explores the unique problems of adolescents who are addicted, as well as people with the dual disorders of a psychiatric and substance use disorder. Understanding Drugs of Abuse will also help the reader understand the role of genetics and other influences on addiction to alcohol, the most widely abused drug of all.

For the past several years, child advocates, parents, and educators have expressed concern over the sexualization of girls. Has the cultural sexual objectification of girls and women increased? Are younger and younger girls sold a "sexed-up" version of femininity, and are adult women sold a girlish sexuality?
The Sexualization of Girls and Girlhood: Causes, Consequences, and Resistance includes the best empirical research, theory, and practice stemming from the report of the American Psychological Association's Task Force on the Sexualization of Girls. Contributors discuss evidence for this phenomenon from media and marketing, to interpersonal interaction, to girls' own efforts to fashion themselves after sexualized role models around them. A variety of consequences of the sexualization of girls and girlhood--for girls themselves, for others, and for society at large--are presented. Individual chapters cover topics such as athletics as a solution and problem for the sexualization of girls, sexual harassment by peers, gendered violence, body image, adolescent girls' sexual development, and healthy sexuality for girls and young women. Importantly, positive alternatives and suggestions are included so that those who care for girls can address this troubling cultural trend and help counter the significant risk to girls' wellbeing that it represents. This volume is a valuable resource for child advocates, parents, and educators and useful for undergraduate and graduate courses that address gender across disciplines such as psychology, sociology, anthropology, education, communication, media studies, and women's, and sexuality studies.

For courses in Adjustment, Interpersonal Behavior, and Human Relations A conceptual and skills-based overview of relationship building in today's world Human Relations: The Art and Science of Building Effective Relationships helps students learn how to communicate more effectively within all of their personal and professional relationships. Employing a three-tiered approach to human relations, author Vivian McCann helps students to understand the psychological concepts that underlie relationships, to build the skills needed to communicate effectively, and to consider the influence of cultural norms and backgrounds throughout the relationship-building process. Revised to reflect the latest data and research, the Second Edition also includes updated information about how new technologies have greatly impacted today's relationships. NOTE: This ISBN is for a Pearson Books a la Carte edition: a convenient, three-hole-punched, loose-leaf text. In addition to the flexibility offered by this format, Books a la Carte editions offer students great value, as they cost significantly less than a bound textbook. Human Relations: The Art and Science of Building Effective Relationships, Second Edition is also available via REVEL (TM), an interactive learning environment that enables students to read, practice, and study in one continuous experience.

There has been considerable controversy and debate in South Africa (and elsewhere) in recent years over an apparent crisis of the family, including appeals for a return to "traditional" family values. To promote a better understanding of this supposed crisis, Family Matters draws on public opinion data to explore the diverse realities of contemporary family life in South Africa and support appropriate policy responses.

For many adult stepchildren, the marriage of a parent is a complicated situation fraught with emotional difficulties as the existing family structure is reshaped through the introduction of new members and the realignment of familial roles and relationships. A parent& rsquo;s marriage and the upheaval it generates can also mobilize long-buried feelings within adult stepchildren, including anger, betrayal, resentment, and a sense of deprivation.

Until now, the millions of adult stepchildren have not had a resource to help them address the psychological issues they face in this situation. Written by an expert with substantial experience in stepfamily life, "Becoming an Adult Stepchild: Adjusting to a Parent's New Marriage" provides invaluable advice on how to examine the underlying issues and feelings engendered by a parent& rsquo;s marriage and use this knowledge to reduce the inherent tension in this situation. In a caring and supportive manner, Dr. Prilik also urges readers to take advantage of the golden opportunities hidden in their parent& rsquo;s marriage, including Initiating positive personal growth Reconciling with an estranged parent Reconnecting with a parent in ways that may enhance closeness with him or her Making changes or taking risks to improve their lives Learning how to cope with uncertainty and change

Dr. Prilik begins each chapter by posing a few questions on specific subjects and situations that challenge readers to examine their feelings, attitudes, and behavior toward their parent& rsquo;s marriage. She then explores the underlying conflicts brought about by these particular circumstances and provides numerous vignettes to illustrate typical adultreactions to a parent& rsquo;s remarriage. She also offers many suggestions on how readers can reduce the tension and acrimony that can develop during this transition.

Armed with this awareness and practical advice, adult stepchildren can build more satisfying relationships within their new family structure and use this unique opportunity for profound personal growth.

Few people realize that polygamy continues to exist in the United States. Thus, world-wide attention focused on the State of Texas in 2008 as agents surrounded the compound of The Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (FLDS) and took custody of more than 400 children. Several members of this schismatic religious group, whose women adorned themselves in "prairie dresses," admitted to practicing polygamy. The state justified the raid on charges that underage marriage was being forced on young women. A year later, however, all but one of the children had been returned to their parents and only ten men were charged with crimes, some barely related to the original charges. This book reveals the history, culture, and sometimes an insider's look at the polygamous groups located primarily in the western parts of the United States.
The contributors to this volume are historians, anthropologists, and sociologists familiar with the various groups. A legal scholar also addresses the legality of the Texas raid and a geneticist examines the paternity issues. Together, these authors provide a much needed understanding of the surprisingly large number of groups and individuals who live a quiet polygamous life style in the United States.

This book explores representations of fathers in select South African novels published from the birth of apartheid to the post-transitional moment.

Father figures in the texts reflect political and social climates in South Africa – at different times representing the oppressive apartheid government, righteous and authoritative liberation leaders and the unfulfilled promise of a democratic South Africa. Grant Andrews examines how father characters are linked to storytelling; they narrate the lives of their children and their patriarchal power is constituted through narratives. He features authors such as Alan Paton, Nadine Gordimer, J.M. Coetzee, Zakes Mda, K. Sello Duiker, Mark Behr, Zoë Wicomb, Lisa Fugard and Zukiswa Wanner.

Stories of Fathers, Stories of the Nation also investigates how fatherhoods are being reimagined in light of shifting discourses of gender and identity. More recent novels have deconstructed the father figure and his paternal narrative power, representing conflicts around racial identity, sexuality, legacy and how the sins of the father are visited on his children.

This book examines the American system of dating, mate choice, and marriage. It analyzes a wide range of established ideas about how dating and mate choice are changing, and identifies changes and continuities in premarital experiences in twentieth century America. A variety of ideas about what sorts of dating and premarital experiences will make for a successful marriage are tested and for the most part disproven, raising serious doubts about our fundamental assumption that dating experience helps individuals make a "wise" choice for a future mate. Marital success turns out to depend not so much on premarital experiences or on the social background characteristics of couples (such as race, religion, and social class) as on the way in which couples structure their day-to-day marital life together. Through its detailed examination of a wide range of ideas and predictions about dating, mating, and marriage, and through its dramatic findings, "Dating, Mating, and Marriage" challenges many previous assumptions and conclusions about the fate of American marriage and elevates our knowledge of the American system of mate choice to a higher level. "Martin King Whyte" is Professor of Sociology at Harvard University. His primary research interests are the sociology of the family and social change in the People's Republic of China and the former Soviet Union. He is the author or editor of several books, and author of several journal articles. He is also a member of several professional Associations including the American Sociological Association, National Committee for U.S. China Relations, and Population Association of America

Based on the Reese's Book Club Pick and New York Times best-seller Fair Play, this couple's conversation deck will help you rebalance your to-do lists, reclaim your time, and rediscover and nurture the skills and interests that make you uniquely you.

Whether you just moved in together, hit a snag in your domestic bliss, or are struggling to keep with your growing family, this adaptable card deck will help you balance the work needed to keep your household humming.

Here's what you're going to do:

1) Sit with your partner for an hour when you're relaxed and feeling good (food and drink help!)
2) Lay out all the task cards, choose only the ones that apply to your family, and take turns deciding which tasks you'll own completely
3) Claim your Unicorn Space cards, which allow you time and space to develop and pursue activities and skills that bring you joy--whether it's learning a new language, playing music, or training for a marathon

Setting both of you up for success in your relationship and parenting, The Fair Play Deck will change the way you think and talk about your home life.

This book is an account of the authora s experiences as a Foster carer, and in particular as a Foster carer of teenage children, over a period of more than twenty years. It is intended to dispel the notion set out over the years in the many recruitment advertisements that Fostering is a life of enduring happiness and contentment for both carers and children. It is never that glamorous. It can, however, over time, be a rewarding and fulfilling experience for both. The author and his wife have been Foster carers since 1997 and are still Foster carers to this day.

A practical guide to nurturing healthy, loving non-monogamous relationships using attachment theory. Attachment theory has entered the mainstream, but most discussions focus on how we can cultivate secure monogamous relationships. What if, like many people, you're striving for secure, happy attachments with more than one partner? Polyamorous psychotherapist Jessica Fern breaks new ground by extending attachment theory into the realm of consensual non-monogamy. Using her nested model of attachment and trauma, she expands our understanding of how emotional experiences can influence our relationships. Then, she sets out six specific strategies to help you move toward secure attachments in your multiple relationships. Polysecure is both a trailblazing theoretical treatise and a practical guide. It provides non-monogamous people with a new set of tools to navigate the complexities of multiple loving relationships, and offers radical new concepts that are sure to influence the conversation about attachment theory.

Fujimura takes us across history and into Russian society, its orphanages and shelters, and along the streets of the nation to see how abandoned children are stigmatized and shunned. Readers come to understand how and why these children, left orphans by death or by choice, form their own culture to find power and to survive. This pioneering work on child abandonment looks at Russian society from a new angle: from the perspectives of abandoned youngsters and their caretakers. Based on direct observation of and interviews with abandoned children, this work shows why any effort to rescue these children calls for a deep understanding of Russian culture, and why any effort to address abandonment in Russia calls for a joint effort between psychologists, social workers, and the children themselves. Researcher Fujimura takes us across history, into Russian society, its orphanages and shelters, and along the streets of the nation to see how abandoned children are stigmatized and shunned. We also come to understand how and why these children, left orphans by death or by choice, form their own culture to find power and to survive. This pioneering work on child abandonment looks at Russian society from a new angle: from the perspectives of abandoned youngsters and their caretakers. Based on direct observation of and interviews with abandoned children, this work shows why any effort to rescue these children calls for a deep understanding of Russian culture, and why any effort to affect abandonment in Russia calls for a joint effort between psychologists, social workers, and the children themselves.

The well-being of children is a vital and highly topical issue. This important new book is the third in a series and updates the findings from a wide range of data to evaluate the outcomes of the Labour government's policies for children. Edited by a highly regarded expert in the field, it uses a framework to compare policy areas, making it an excellent source book for researchers, policy makers and students.

J.R. Moehringer grew up captivated by a voice. It was the voice of his father, a New York City disc jockey who vanished before J.R. spoke his first word. Sitting on the stoop, pressing an ear to the radio, J.R. would strain to hear in that plummy baritone the secrets of masculinity and identity. Though J.R.'s mother was his world, his rock, he craved something more, something faintly and hauntingly audible only in The Voice. At eight years old, suddenly unable to find The Voice on the radio, J.R. turned in desperation to the bar on the corner, where he found a rousing chorus of new voices. The alphas along the bar--including J.R.'s Uncle Charlie, a Humphrey Bogart look-alike; Colt, a Yogi Bear sound-alike; and Joey D, a softhearted brawler--took J.R. to the beach, to ballgames, and ultimately into their circle. They taught J.R., tended him, and provided a kind of fathering-by-committee. Torn between the stirring example of his mother and the lurid romance of the bar, J.R. tried to forge a self somewhere in the center. But when it was time for J.R. to leave home, the bar became an increasingly seductive sanctuary, a place to return and regroup during his picaresque journeys. Time and again the bar offered shelter from failure, rejection, heartbreak--and eventually from reality. In the grand tradition of landmark memoirs, The Tender Bar is suspenseful, wrenching, and achingly funny. A classic American story of self-invention and escape, of the fierce love between a single mother and an only son, it's also a moving portrait of one boy's struggle to become a man, and an unforgettable depiction of how men remain, at heart, lost boys.