While out shopping, Logan bumps into a customer. His grandma asks
him to apologize, and later teaches him about good manners. When at
age five, my grandson bumped into another customer while out
shopping, and I asked him to apologize, he couldn't understand why,
as it was obviously an accident. I told him that apologizing was
having good manners, to which he questioningly replied, "Manners
are...?" It was a perfect opportunity to teach him, so after we
returned home, we made a list of the most important good manners
together, which I later put to rhyme and included in this book,
"Manners Are...?" I found that posting a Good Manners Chart, and
offering a Good Manners Certificate after my grandson filled up the
chart with stickers, was a great incentive and visual way to
reinforce particular manners that needed focus at any given time. I
have included a sample chart and certificate in the back of this
book, which you can cut out, photocopy, or laminate if you wish.
Once copied or laminated, you can fill in the blanks with
additional manners that you would like to focus on with your child.
Even with charts and positive reinforcement, learning good manners
doesn't happen overnight and is a continuous process. Just the
other day, at 8 years old, while my grandson was pushing the
shopping cart for me at a grocery store, he energetically moved
forward, shouting, "Watch out, you guys " to people in his way. I
explained to him that was not the right way to ask people to pass,
and that the well-mannered way to say it was, "Excuse me, sir or
ma'am, may I pass, please?" He picked it up quickly, and was so
pleased when someone commended him for his good manners. Of course,
there are many more manners than the ones included in "Manners
Are...?," but these were what my grandson needed to learn and focus
on first. I hope that they can be a good start for other children
with autism too, and that this book will make it just a little
easier for you to teach them.
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