With only months left to live, 16-year-old Tessa makes a list of
things she must experience: sex, petty crime, fame, drugs and true
love. Downham's wrenching work features a girl desperate for a few
thrilling moments before leukemia takes her away. Although Tessa
remains ardently committed to her list, both she and the reader
find comfort in the quiet resonance of the natural world. Tessa's
soul mate, Adam, gardens next door; a bird benignly rots in grass;
psychedelic mushrooms provide escape; an apple tree brings comfort;
and her best friend, Zoey, ripens in the final months of pregnancy.
Downham's lithe, facile writing creates a chiaroscuro of life and
death, of organic growth and decay. Although Tessa begins to see
herself within the natural continuum, she still feels furious with
her lot. She lashes out and behaves cruelly at times, making her
believable to teen readers. Because her experience feels so
palpable, readers will believe that the novel's final pages might
offer a crystalline vision of death. Lucid language makes a painful
journey bearable, beautiful and transcendent. (Fiction. YA) (Kirkus
Reviews)
Tessa has just a few months to live. Fighting back against hospital
visits, endless tests, drugs with excruciating side-effects, Tessa
compiles a list. It's her Ten Things To Do Before I Die list. And
Number One is sex. Released from the constraints of 'normal' life,
Tessa tastes new experiences to make her feel alive while her
failing body struggles to keep up. Tessa's feelings, her
relationships with her father and brother, her estranged mother,
her best friend, her new boyfriend, all are painfully crystallized
in the precious weeks before Tessa's time finally runs out. BEFORE
I DIE is a brilliantly-crafted novel, heartbreaking yet
astonishingly life-affirming. It will take you to the very edge.
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