'I feel like I'm always... last. Like I'm running to try and keep up with everyone but it's no good.' April has always been a little bit EXTRA. She feels everything to the max and would rather express herself using pictures over words. More likely to be found drawing and doodling than paying attention in class, April has always struggled with school. Lessons feel like they're in a foreign language making her brain shut down. And it sometimes feels like her classmates come from a different planet, especially now they're all suddenly obsessed with their latest crushes and teeny bopper dramas which April just finds BORING. As lessons continue to perplex her and the detentions build up, April thinks maybe she is doing Year 8 all wrong? She's always been fine doing her own thing, so why does it suddenly feel like everyone around her is pulling away and leaving her behind? Perhaps life would be easier if she just learned to fit in. An empowering follow up to WHEN I SEE BLUE about finding your place in the world.

'Extremely compelling' - THE GUARDIAN 'It's a fascinating read... Buy the book! Buy the book!' - JO GOOD, BBC RADIO LONDON 'Searing... funny, eloquent and honest' - PSYCHOLOGIES 'Remarkable... I hope this book finds a wide readership' - WASHINGTON POST 'A beautifully-rendered memoir' - PUBLISHERS WEEKLY 'Often as chilling as Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar, but also full of so much inner and external turbulence that it reminded me at times of The Bourne Identity and Memento. Readers will root for Lily, even when she is attempting to run away from the realities and sometimes authorities chasing her.' - HUFFPOST UK 'A harrowingly honest memoir' - KIRKUS REVIEWS' Because We Are Bad is an emotional, challenging read. Lily takes us deep into the heart of the illness but she is also a deft writer, and even the darkest moments are peppered with wit and wry observations.' - JAMES LLOYD, OCD-UK As a child, Lily Bailey knew she was bad. By the age of 13, she had killed someone with a thought, spread untold disease, and spied upon her classmates. Only by performing a series of secret routines could she correct her wrongdoing. But it was never enough. She had a severe case of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and it came with a bizarre twist. This true story lights up the workings of the mind like Mark Haddon or Matt Haig. Anyone who wants to know about OCD, and how to fight back, should read this book. It is ideal for anyone who liked books by fellow OCD sufferers Bryony Gordon (Mad Girl, Glorious Rock Bottom), Rose Cartwright (Pure), and David Adam (The Man Who Couldn't Stop: The Truth About OCD). EXTRACT Chapter 1: Chesbury Hospital From the outside, Chesbury Hospital in London looks like a castle that got lost and was plonked down in the wrong place. It is long and white, with battlements and arched windows from which princesses could call down, in the chapter before they are saved. But it's not entirely believable. Where the portcullis should be, there are giant glass doors. Walk through them, and you could be in a five-star hotel. The man at reception wears a suit and tie and asks if he can help, like he's going to book you a table. A glass cupboard showcases the gifts sold by reception: bath oils, rejuvenating face cream, and Green & Black's chocolate, just in case you arrive empty-handed to see a crazy relative and need an icebreaker. The walls, lampshades, window fittings, and radiators are all a similar, unnameable colour, somewhere between brown, yellow, and cream. A looping gold chandelier is suspended by a heavy chain; the fireplace has marble columns. The members of staff have busy, preoccupied faces-until they come close to you, when their mouths break into wide, fixed smiles. Compared with the Harley Street clinic, there is a superior choice of herbal teas. When the police arrived after the escape, Mum cried a lot; then she shouted. Now she has assumed a sense of British resolve. She queries: 'Wild Jasmine, Purple Rose, or Earl Grey?' A nurse checks through my bag, which has been lugged upstairs. She takes the razor (fair enough), tweezers (sort of fair enough), a bottle of Baileys lying forgotten in the handbag (definitely fair enough), and headphones (definitely not fair enough). There would never be a hanging: far too much mess. The observation room is next to the nurses' station; they keep you there until you are no longer a risk to yourself. It is 10th January, 2013, and I am 19. ABOUT THE WRITER Lily Bailey is a model, writer, and mental health campaigner. As a child and teenager, Lily suffered from severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). She kept her illness private, until the widespread misunderstanding of the disorder spurred her into action. She began campaigning for better awareness and understanding of OCD, and has tried to stop companies making products that trivialise the illness.

'Extremely compelling' - THE GUARDIAN 'It's a fascinating read... Buy the book! Buy the book!' - JO GOOD, BBC RADIO LONDON 'Searing... funny, eloquent and honest' - PSYCHOLOGIES 'Remarkable... I hope this book finds a wide readership' - WASHINGTON POST 'A beautifully-rendered memoir' - PUBLISHERS WEEKLY 'Often as chilling as Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar, but also full of so much inner and external turbulence that it reminded me at times of The Bourne Identity and Memento. Readers will root for Lily, even when she is attempting to run away from the realities and sometimes authorities chasing her.' - HUFFPOST UK 'A harrowingly honest memoir' - KIRKUS REVIEWS' Because We Are Bad is an emotional, challenging read. Lily takes us deep into the heart of the illness but she is also a deft writer, and even the darkest moments are peppered with wit and wry observations.' - JAMES LLOYD, OCD-UK As a child, Lily Bailey knew she was bad. By the age of 13, she had killed someone with a thought, spread untold disease, and spied upon her classmates. Only by performing a series of secret routines could she correct her wrongdoing. But it was never enough. She had a severe case of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and it came with a bizarre twist. This true story lights up the workings of the mind like Mark Haddon or Matt Haig. Anyone who wants to know about OCD, and how to fight back, should read this book. It is ideal for anyone who liked books by fellow OCD sufferers Bryony Gordon (Mad Girl, Glorious Rock Bottom), Rose Cartwright (Pure), and David Adam (The Man Who Couldn't Stop: The Truth About OCD). EXTRACT Chapter 1: Chesbury Hospital From the outside, Chesbury Hospital in London looks like a castle that got lost and was plonked down in the wrong place. It is long and white, with battlements and arched windows from which princesses could call down, in the chapter before they are saved. But it's not entirely believable. Where the portcullis should be, there are giant glass doors. Walk through them, and you could be in a five-star hotel. The man at reception wears a suit and tie and asks if he can help, like he's going to book you a table. A glass cupboard showcases the gifts sold by reception: bath oils, rejuvenating face cream, and Green & Black's chocolate, just in case you arrive empty-handed to see a crazy relative and need an icebreaker. The walls, lampshades, window fittings, and radiators are all a similar, unnameable colour, somewhere between brown, yellow, and cream. A looping gold chandelier is suspended by a heavy chain; the fireplace has marble columns. The members of staff have busy, preoccupied faces-until they come close to you, when their mouths break into wide, fixed smiles. Compared with the Harley Street clinic, there is a superior choice of herbal teas. When the police arrived after the escape, Mum cried a lot; then she shouted. Now she has assumed a sense of British resolve. She queries: 'Wild Jasmine, Purple Rose, or Earl Grey?' A nurse checks through my bag, which has been lugged upstairs. She takes the razor (fair enough), tweezers (sort of fair enough), a bottle of Baileys lying forgotten in the handbag (definitely fair enough), and headphones (definitely not fair enough). There would never be a hanging: far too much mess. The observation room is next to the nurses' station; they keep you there until you are no longer a risk to yourself. It is 10th January, 2013, and I am 19. ABOUT THE WRITER Lily Bailey is a model, writer, and mental health campaigner. As a child and teenager, Lily suffered from severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). She kept her illness private, until the widespread misunderstanding of the disorder spurred her into action. She began campaigning for better awareness and understanding of OCD, and has tried to stop companies making products that trivialise the illness.

New town, new school, but the bully is in Ben's head ... There are 4 things you should know about Ben: 1. He's 12 years old 2. He's the new kid at school 3. His special number is 4 4. He has a bully in his brain Sometimes Ben's brain makes him count to 4 to prevent bad things happening. Sometimes it makes him tap or blink in 4s. Mostly it makes the smallest things feel impossible. And with a new school, a moody big brother, an absent dad and a mum battling her own demons, Ben feels more out of control than ever. But then he meets April, and with his new friend, Ben might finally figure out how to stand up to the bully in his brain, once and for all. An authentic and affecting #ownvoices story about living life with OCD, from the inspiring author and mental health activist, Lily Bailey. Perfect for readers of A Kind of Spark and The Goldfish Boy. 'With characters you will take to your heart and never want to leave, this is a heart-warming and joyous read about the importance of empathy and understanding.' The Scotsman 'This book deserves to sit alongside Wonder as a modern classic.' Read and Reviewed blog 'What Wonder (R.J. Palacio) does for people with physical deformity - When I see Blue will, without doubt, do for those with OCD ... this is a story of hope.' Sue Chambers, Waterstones bookseller

'A stellar cast of writers and thinkers' Nathan Filer An explorer spends a decade preparing for an expedition to the South Pole; what happens when you live for a goal, but once it's been accomplished, you discover it's not enough? A successful broadcast journalist ends up broke, drunk and sleeping rough; what makes alcohol so hard to resist despite its ruinous consequences? A teenage girl tries to disappear by starving herself; what is this force that compels so many women to reduce their size so drastically? In this essay collection, writers share the struggles that have shaped their lives - loss, depression, addiction, anxiety, trauma, identity and others. But as they take you on a journey to the darkest recesses of their mind, the authors grapple with challenges that haunt us all.

A Love Song is an in-depth look at human behavior from a spiritual and psychological perspective. It explores the nature of thought and emotion and the division we tend to create between the two. It looks at the ego as a false construct whose sole purpose is to protect us from the emotional pain we do not wish to feel--ultimately concluding that it is our unwillingness to be honest with ourselves that leaves us separated from God. This book is a powerful guide to self-discovery. It reminds us that our sole purpose here on earth is to realize our true nature, to remember that we are beings of love and light who have, only for the moment, chosen to hide in darkness. If you have ever questioned your own behavior or been unable to understand the actions or decisions you have made, this book will point you in the direction of your own personal truth, the same truth shared by all of humanity.