No one knows how unpredictable first graders can be better than a first-grade teacher. In Mommy Couldn't Find Her Eyelashes, retired elementary educator Mary Jane Fizer shares excerpts from written papers and some of her favorite amusing and poignant conversations with her first-grade students, providing an unforgettable glimpse into the innocent, often uncensored minds and imaginations of children.

Fizer relies on more than forty years of experience in a classroom environment to offer a diverse compilation of funny sayings and heartfelt moments she experienced with her students. From the student who said he wanted to be both the President of the United States and a forklift operator to the boy who announced that he needed to see the nurse because he thought he had head lights, Fizer recalls the unpredictable moments of every day she spent in front of a classroom serving not only as a teacher, but also as a role model, stand-in mother, and a source of information who had to somehow find a creative answer to every creative question.

Mommy Couldn't Find Her Eyelashes is a delightful collection of quotes from children that encourages all of us to find the pure happiness in every day-even when we are all grown up.

The ultimate handbook of dating euphemisms, relationship shorthand, and the common wisdom of girlfriends who've been there.

All women know that Training Wheels (fake diamond earrings) don't count as a Big-Ticket Item (a gift big enough to get a man out of trouble). Most have spent an evening doing Raw Cookie Dough Time (after they've been dumped), and when they were really desperate, dated men from the Recycling Bin (What did you hate about him? You don't remember).

But for anyone needing a translation, or just a laugh, Diane Farr offers a whimsical guide to dating vernacular. Some hilariously well-known, some newly minted, these are slang terms for the different stages of love and dating, for body parts and common sexual experiences, and for all the ways of making up and breaking up. The Girl Code is part not-so-secret code, part code of silence (remember: Never admit to collecting boyfriend T-shirts), and part code of honor (girlfriends never ditch each other at a singles bar, no matter what). As funny as it is familiar, The Girl Code is ultimately a tribute to girlfriends everywhere.

Angels, Butterflies & Dragons 2 edition has more captivating twist of heartfelt poetry, prose and short stories added, you don't want to miss this edition. You will laugh more, cry more, reflect, relate and capture many moments in time. Angels, Butterflies & Dragons 2 will bless your heart and soul in more ways than one.

Instead of making lemonade from lemons when her life took an unexpected turn in 2005, author Susan Hanf instead planted an entire metaphorical lemon orchard. She's still tending her orchard in this follow-up to the entertaining "My Lemon Orchard." With the same sense of humor, this new collection of entertaining short stories, "My Lemon Orchard Gets Fertilized," describes some of the many misadventures Susan has experienced in her lifetime.

From childhood to adulthood, Susans personal anecdotes provide a humorous look at life. From youthful adventures of finding a dead bullfrog in a creek, to being attacked by a three-inch long snake, or traversing a construction site fence only to be immersed in mounds of mud, Susan's stories remind us of our own early mischievousness. As adults, many of us can relate to her battles with a computer and other mechanical items, struggles with cooking, and challenges in tackling the ever elusive marathon.

With self-effacing humor and frankness, Susan reminds us we're not the only ones who experience misadventure. Join her on a walk through her lemon orchard...you'll leave with a laugh and a smile.

Andrew was writing a book about how to live with crazy humans. He died before he could finish it. When Rita came on the scene, she decided to finish the book and really tell humans what is wrong with them.

The definitive collection of Ohio's odd, wacky, and most offbeat people, places, and things, for Ohio residents and anyone else who enjoys local humor and trivia with a twist.

Pryor like Very Funny comedy reading You'll either love it, or like it Great reading A Coffee Table book must have A Fun Book

The definitive collection of South Carolina's odd, wacky, and most offbeat people, places, and things, for South Carolina residents and anyone else who enjoys local humor and trivia with a twist.

Looking For Lady takes up where Dennis Apperly's first novel Wasteground leaves off - at the funeral of The Professor, in the cathedral. They are all there - Midnight Sam, Scots Robby, Fen, Nobby and Splodge and Brian Davies, to name but a few - as Bishop John leads the huge congregation in a poignant farewell to the city's best-loved tramp. After the funeral, life on the wasteground goes on much as before, although Midnight Sam - who regarded the late street-drinker as his personal responsibility - is not the same since The Prof's death. Not only does he miss his friend, but he misses the vulnerable Lady Jane, who has been whisked 'up north' by the violent Blacklock. With not altogether welcome assistance from cronies old and new, Midnight embarks upon a chaotic mission to find the woman he slowly begins to realise he is in love with. The lovable down-and-out soon makes a remarkable discovery: find Lady Jane and he finds Midnight Sam. Meanwhile, Lady makes a remarkable discovery of her own - a discovery which changes her life and the life of Midnight Sam forever. Looking for Lady is more than a bitter-sweet love story with a difference. It is an Odyssey of hope for two seemingly hopeless individuals. Against a background of intermingled tragedy and comedy, the book demonstrates how it is possible for society's so-called misfits to rise triumphantly above the wasteground and proves that love really can conquer all.

The definitive collection of New Hampshire's odd, wacky, and most offbeat people, places, and things, for New Hampshire residents and anyone else who enjoys local humor and trivia with a twist.

"Flirting With The Truth" is a collection of short stories and poems, all of which are true, based on situations and events that have taken place in the life thus far, of the author, Luella Thomas. The story, "A Fed Up Woman" can certainly be appreciated by both women and men: it is about entering into a relationship in hopes of becoming that special one to tie the knot, but after several years of patiently waiting, and with a deadly blow to her ego, which would inevitably shock her back to reality, Luella would quickly learn that letting go and moving on, would prove to be most challenging. The story, "Simon Said" is about friendship, politics, and deadly intensions to undermine, manipulate, and destroy the innocent. With an uncontrollable lust to recruit those who were vulnerable and weak, and to entrap anyone who would get in the way of his progress, Simon would stop at nothing. Known for his charm and charismatic approach, many loved him initially, and although he marveled in delight while watching his victims helplessly self-destruct, he spared no prisoners who entered into his web of deceit: the lost of their pride and then death, was eminent. The poem, "A Righteous Prayer" offers a prayer of relief to those who seek spiritual guidance, while "Now Is The Time" addresses change, commitment, and loyalty, in order to survive today's social and economic problems. "A Message To My People" is a must read poem, for it addresses the issues of morals and values amongst ourselves, our families, and our allies. "Flirting With The Truth" is said to be a sharp and invigorating piece of literary work, comprised of hair-raising poems and heart-felt stories about life's lessons, which renders 'food for thought'. It's funny, entertaining, and a pleasure to read.