FIRST BOOK EVER THAT MUST BE READ CLOCK WISE... You want drama, entertainment, anger, humor and education all at the same time This creative emotional selection of rhyming poems are confined from dreams, ideas, family, friends, strangers and Antoinette Faine's own life experiences. Also inspired by the book "Sweetness was my Weakness" where a older female falls in love with a younger man then finds out she got more than she bargain for. Throughout the story the main characters thoughts are in rhyming poetry similar to the poems in this book. Breakfast time, bedtime or just for fun... After you read this please pray to the sun... About this book tell everyone... Enjoy it because there is more to come... Thanking you, you and you a million...

While the solution I offer to the growing problem of restaurant-patrons blowing their noses outwardly and openly within public dinning rooms, is simple and that I could have easily stated within a single paragraph, this would be a lost opportunity. I say this because my example and solution for only one problem we may experience during our stay at a public eatery, is simply that..."an example." I am using what might be the single most disgusting behavioral act that can be perpetrated but not hidden, by a fellow restaurant-patron, being that of "dinning room nose blowing." My purpose being to set a type of standard for correction of similar problems. Certainly we could instead report undesirable behaviors to the staff of a food service establishment. We could simply ask them to speak to the offending patron, requesting that they desist their gross or offensive activity, while keeping us anonymous. My question however, would be to ask if this would be the best way to send corrective admonition? I think not. ... (JUST A TASTE OF WHAT YOU"LL GET IN THIS OVER 3,000 WORD DISSERTATION ) TABLE OF CONTENTS: 1. Introduction 2. Rudeness of all Types Can Occur in Restaurants 3. "Restaurant Boogie Fever" - One of the Rudeness Biggies 4. What You Would Like to Do (but Can't) 5. What You Can Do Within Legal Limits 6. In Conclusion ________________________________________ **The History Behind these Comedy/Satire Books**: While my largest base of book titles are on health disorder subjects, I also have a significant number of business-related titles published, as well as many on Christian Bible theology. Before I began publishing in any of these serious genres, which I do feel are my most important ones, I tried my hand at comedy via online articles I wrote in years previous. Having kept these comedy pieces I wrote, in saved files after taking them offline, I decided to revive them by publishing them in eBook and paperback form. I did have to tweak them and edit them a bit but I managed to give them that Percy P. III flavor. Of course as real the author (James M. Lowrance), I think they're pretty funny and relatives who I shared them with, confirmed this evaluation -- so I decided to offer them to the world. With them being so different from my serious subject books, I assigned a pen name to them as well, being "Percyvelle Pennington the Third." He seems more like the guy who wrote them, than I do. Percy is a snide type guy and he is arrogant; traits that I hopefully never display in real life He does make his points known in his memoirs but in strangely comical ways (the intention).

42 Things to do When You're the Last Man on Earth is NOT - we repeat NOT - a "how to" book. If you happen to find yourself alone on the planet and you are armed only with your wits and this novel you are in serious trouble. Though before you die a horrible death we hope you take time to read the swiftly moving science fiction comedy novel about a security guard who wakes up one morning to discover everyone else on the planet had left. Now he, his super advanced talking sneakers, and a couple of other stragglers must figure out how and why everyone else left while battling evil cows, insane civil servants, and other nasty surprises. This will most likely be the most powerful book you have ever read that features talking sneakers.

“I’ve changed a bit since high school. Back then I said no to using and selling drugs. I washed on a normal basis and still had good credit.”

Introducing Laurie Notaro, the leader of the Idiot Girls’ Action-Adventure Club. Every day she fearlessly rises from bed to defeat the evil machinations of dolts, dimwits, and creepy boyfriends—and that’s before she even puts on a bra.

For the past ten years, Notaro has been entertaining Phoenix newspaper readers with her wildly amusing autobiographical exploits and unique life experiences. She writes about a world of hourly-wage jobs that require absolutely no skills, a mother who hands down judgments more forcefully than anyone seated on the Supreme Court, horrific high school reunions, and hangovers that leave her surprised that she woke up in the first place.

The misadventures of Laurie and her fellow Idiot Girls (“too cool to be in the Smart Group”) unfold in a world that everyone will recognize but no one has ever described so hilariously. She delivers the goods: life as we all know it.

Shakespeare applied to stupid statements made by Liberals, political, lawyer, and other jokes. Also, Shakespeare applied to current issues. Formatted in four columns: Who or issue; They said, deed, joke, or author's comment; Shakespeare quotes; and Source of Shakespeare quotes.

When, on returning home one evening, after a pipe party at my friend Jephson's, I informed my wife that I was going to write a novel, she expressed herself as pleased with the idea. She said she had often wondered I had never thought of doing so before. "

For those of you who grew up in the 50s, 60s, and 70s, this book is for you. Wayne Danka grew up with the best bunch of friends a guy could have. Professional mischief-makers and best friends to the end, Wayne and his buddies were always trying to get the most fun out of life they possibly could. Meeting gangsters, hustling gamblers, and encountering ruthless thugs make up just a few of the stories that will make you laugh out loud as you take a trip down memory lane. A collection of short stories about growing up, coming of age, maturity, and immaturity during the three greatest decades of the 20th century. Author Bio: Wayne Frank Danka grew up in Trenton, New Jersey. His next book is based on his adventures mingling with the inner circle of the Playboy Empire. Wayne managed the Phoenix Playboy Club in Arizona for five years and is now a representative for buyers of fine precious diamonds. He currently lives in Scottsdale, Arizona.

In "For Play, " a former pro basketball player shares a collection of sexual learning experiences gathered over a thirty-year period, beginning with the sexual revolution. When they first met, Will McMasters and Jack Callahan were just a couple of college guys who somehow managed to fumble their away around in the bedroom. As both began to sexually mature, Will married Cynthia while Jack launched an unforgettable journey of sexual freedom that soon included his married friends. As McMasters relays true stories of voyeurism, threesomes, and exhibitionism, he presents a variety of lovemaking ideas and sexual techniques that will encourage lovers to open their minds and bodies to new possibilities and ultimately pursue better sex lives. "For Play" shares the candid, erotic, and sometimes humorous portrayal of the journey of two friends whose experiences will help others learn how to relax, have great sex, and discover more rewarding relationships in the process.

In his memoir, The Man from Africa, author Christopher Osagie describes the cultural differences that he experienced when he moved from Africa to the United States. In spite of these differences, he adjusts to his new life and learns to appreciate the higher moral standards in his new country. From being a pest control technician to becoming a poultry specialist, he demonstrates the abundance of opportunities available to anyone who is ready and willing to work very hard.

In Nigeria, as in many other African countries, immigrating to the United States is a common dream. The United States is usually referred to as "God's own country" because of the perceived limitless opportunities available to all those willing to work hard in order to achieve their individual ambitions. Consequently, Nigerians with successful careers-even established professionals, such as medical doctors, lawyers, and engineers-have chosen to leave behind all that they have achieved in order to immigrate to the United States, where they believe they will have the opportunity to attain even more.

The Man from Africa was written to enlighten new immigrants from other countries in Africa and from all over the world about what to expect if they choose to immigrate to the United States.

Marty is a Professional Bus / Shuttle Driver and has been driving for many years. His occupation is one that puts him up front and personal with a special sector of our society; Bus Passengers. Over the years he has accumulated an assortment of short stories while driving a city transit bus; he wishes to share these stories with you. Many of these stories are serious while others are mind boggling, hilarious or just make you say, "Oh my gosh; what were they thinking." He has written this book using the following parameters: there are no swear words in this book (He doesn't need to use profanity to get his point across); he does not identify any ethnic backgrounds of the people in his stories (Marty wants people to view people without prejudice and bias) and lastly he was honest and told the truth to the best of his ability (By doing this he has found out that people don't like the truth and will go to extremes to avoid it.) Marty's' writings are unique because he writes like he talks. He does this so that he can relate to anybody who has ever told a story. The stories that he tells are inspirational, motivational and humorous. He has become a Master Story Teller and shares his stories with all who will listen. So get on board; Put your fare in the box; Grab a seat and be prepared for the ride of your life "HEY, I'M MARTY. I DRIVE THE BUS " BOOK I is currently being sold worldwide.

The keeper of family history, the teller of tales, the collector of treasures, Betty Owen Whitehouse has woven the tapestry of her life with the threads of love, friendship, and the mentorship received from her large family and a multitude of friends, old and new. In Quotes, Quips, and Quirks she shares some of her favorite snippets gathered from a lifelong interest in literary and writing endeavors. Gathered from the women who played a role in the author's life, Quotes, Quips, and Quirks contains an array of uplifting messages: / Thought-provoking mottos / Sage advice passed down through generations / Quirky sayings that have become part of family lore / Humorous quips / Special poems / Oft-repeated proverbs / Favorite scriptures and remarks by well-known women With a blend of humor and inspiration, this collection provides food for thought in an easy-to-read format that can become a treasured keepsake.