Honey Get the Door! is a book of illustrated thoughts and pictures of Honey the wee sausage dog who Janey Godley ventriloquises for her fans across social media on a regular basis. In this book Honey tells us what she really thinks about her life as a dachshund, with Janey's own thoughts, along with cute photographs and hilarious illustrations, interspersed throughout. This edition contains strong language and is not suitable for children.

In the UK, the early 1970's were a time of innocence. 'Punk' was what Clint Eastwood called a villain before he blew their head off, Maggie Thatcher was 'that nice lady with the funny hats' and young people were actually paid to go to college and get educated. However change was afoot. Hot pants and the 'maxi' had replaced the mini skirt, a guaranteed job after school was a thing of the past and the booming sixties had given way to the three day week and growing industrial unrest. The introduction of decimalisation had brought with it creeping inflation, household budgets were being stretched and one particular group of students, living in England's sprawling Metropolis, were finding it increasingly difficult to make their student grant cover the cost of their beer, records, clothes and food (in that order), never mind pay for their accommodation and the occasional course book. Desperate measures were needed if they were to make their money stretch to the end of term. This is their story of survival....... What others have to say about the book....... It'll never make the Richard and Judy Booklist. (The authors mum) Who are Richard and Judy? (His dad) His expansive use of the English vernacular puts the author in the same esteemed company as Shakespeare, Milton and Dickens. (His agent) B#ll#cks (Charles Dickens)

With the unstoppable onslaught of large corporations taking over independent funeral directors, this story tells of one such independent funeral director in London who is determined to unload his funeral homes onto the Norwegian private equity company Steiffen-Koch, which is offering big krone for a piece of the UK funeral market. Winston Clodpense Rott's whole work force face an uncertain future until the shenanigans of a local crime lord and two bungling cremation superintendents bring about a startling change. Rott's team, led by Douglas Deeler, comprises a host of dysfunctional and disgusting characters, all of who, despite their hygiene and habit issues, become the core players in this wry, tongue-in-cheek glimpse into the world of dealing with the dead.

It has been said that the eyes are the windows to one's soul. Poetry to me is like a snapshot of ones soul, freezing a moment in time, creating a picture that means different things to different people, evoking unique feelings for the individual reader. Etched into your beings fiber are those moments that shape you. I believe it is good to revisit those that you have stored, the pleasant, the painful and the... Observing where we came from, remembering auspicious beginnings can affect the future giving strength to rise to any challenge that life's crazy ride might throw at you. So, I titled this collection of poems with an Irish proverb, which derives its strength from its simplicity.

The Cleburne County Search and Rescue Team recently found and saved a man lost on Mt. Cheaha in Alabama. The man had set out with his wife and kids on the difficult Pinhoti Trail, but once the wife and kids headed back, the man continued on. When he didn't return, his wife panicked and called in the search squad-who eventually found a man in his fifties, weighing about three hundred pounds, wearing leg braces, and using crutches. This story just goes to show that if you're gonna be stupid, you've gotta be tough. Author Bob Cole knows all about it. He grew up on a farm in rural Georgia and used to have to chase cows before getting on the bus for school. Smelling like manure in front of the other kids certainly added a bit of toughness. Since those days, he has worked, married, and seen the world, but through it all, the old adage about toughness and stupidity still holds true. This collection of true short stories follows Bob as he travels along the bumpy road of life. Follow him through a midlife crisis, family hijinks, meeting a new son-in-law, and on a mission trip to foreign lands (after all, stupidity is worldwide). Despite some hard times-and some tough decisions-Bob Cole has never lost his sense of humor, and it's apparent in this collection that will keep readers laughing, crying, and actin' tough

Una serie de historias cortas y disquisiciones sobre el diario vivir llevados al lector de una manera llana... Cautivantes di logos llenos de jocosidad, eso es lo que nos trae el autor en esta edici n. Usted quedara atrapado en este libro de interesantes relatos y no podr despegarse de l hasta llegar al final donde el Dr. Froilan se embarca en un tierno e hilarante dialogo sobre el bien y el mal, nada menos que con su nieto de cinco a os. Fascinante

Who are the Curmudgeon Virgins and how are they related to Diddly Squat? Or Sheryl Crow? Or Yankee Doodle?

What do mullets have in common with fired football coaches? Or Facebook? Or mall walkers?

In Search of Diddly Squat provides answers to those questions. It could be called a quest for truth, justice, and the America way, even though there is very little truth and almost no justice in it. Just humor. And satire. And sarcasm. And short, choppy sentences that start with "and." And "or." But not "but."

Whilst there are enough celebrity connections and anecdotes not to be out of place in an A list autobiography, the real hook of this book is that the author isn t remotely famous. The endearing appeal is that it is the viewpoint of the everyman, but one who has had enough light brushes with celebrity that he has some great tales to tell. These stories, anecdotes and musings are seamlessly woven into what for many of us will be a memory jogging, laughter inducing remembrance of some of the major, as well as quainter, stranger and more trivial moments of pop culture over the last few decades. If you love pop music and pop culture, feared the Daleks, the Child Catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and mourn the demise of Pez, Cresta, conkers as a rite of passage, jokes on lolly sticks, Top of the Pops and pink vinyl limited edition LP s, then you will surely enjoy this. Please beware This book may waste days (if not weeks) of your life as almost every paragraph will have you frantically typing into your search engine and getting lost, on what may turn out to be an endless Internet Safari. This book contains some adult humour. Best Wishes and Good Luck with your writing Ben Elton"

Finding the humor in life is a skill honed and presented by Shirley Nicholson in "Thoughts While Waiting in the Doctor's Office." In this collection of thirty-six essays and memoirs, Nicholson entertains by capturing the funny events in her life and through her observations. From puberty to dating, from marriage to honeymoons, from housework to pets, Nicholson writes about these events with warmth. She pokes fun of her tooth fairy stint, her klutziness, and her parenting skills. In "I Was a Teenage Car Thief ," she tells the story of inadvertently becoming a car thief when a salesman at her father's store gave her his car keys and permission to drive the car. She retrieved the vehicle from the location where she thought the salesman said he parked his car, drove it around town, and later returned it to the store's back lot. When the salesman left for the day, he returned and announced that the car parked in the back lot wasn't his. Without realizing it, Nicholson had stolen a car. Laugh along with "Thoughts While Waiting in the Doctor's Office" as Nicholson reveals the day-to-day wit in her comic strip of life.