My name is Gear Bear (and for the record, "Gear" rhymes with "Bear"). I am a small, brown bear who has had the opportunity and pleasure of great travel, and these are my stories.

I am a very lucky bear for so many reasons. I get to travel just about everywhere my friends and family go-but sometimes they get so excited about being someplace new that they leave me behind, forget me, or lose me. I've even been bearnapped But no matter what happens, I am always ready for a new adventure.

I have a lot of miles under my belt and many stamps in my passport. I've traveled on a canoe down the Wisconsin River-through a nude beach, no less-on the back of a motorcycle to the Sturgis Bike Rally, and on the back of a horse through the Ozark Mountains. I've even had a ghost encounter at a local establishment and a search-and-rescue mission with the help of a US Marshal

I've traveled by plane, train, and automobile, and more. It seems that no matter where I go or what I do, trouble and adventure seem to follow.

Most of us have encountered frustrating incidents in our lifetimes. For humor columnist Wolfgang Niesielski, one of his most exasperating moments involves an expensive hotel room, a faulty thermostat, and a patronizing front desk clerk-only to be rescued by two gentlemen who, after conferring with each other in hushed tones, change their pleasant demeanor into the serious miens of surgeons before a heart transplant operation.

In this compilation of his humor columns, Niesielski provides an amusing take on everyday experiences. See what it's like to have an evil cyber presence monopolize your e-mail account, understand the overwhelming differences between first class and tourist class on an airplane, and find out why it's important to choose the right gift for a loved one-even if it is a Salad Shooter or an electric nail-file buffing system. From learning how unforgiving Mother Nature truly is when he forgets how to water the lawn to the moment when he discovers he is a procrastinator in the worst way, Niesielski illustrates what fun life can be when one learns to laugh at himself.

The Alien in My E-Mail and Other Stories takes others on a delightful ride through one man's wacky life-Salad Shooter and all.

'One of the greatest achievements in comedy. A work of staggering genius' - David Walliams An international phenomenon and pop-culture classic, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has been a radio show, TV series, novel, stage play, comic book and film. Following the galactic (mis)adventures of Arthur Dent, Hitchhiker's in its various incarnations has captured the imaginations of curious minds around the world . . . It's an ordinary Thursday lunchtime for Arthur Dent until his house gets demolished. The Earth follows shortly afterwards to make way for a new hyperspace express route, and his best friend has just announced that he's an alien. At this moment, they're hurtling through space with nothing but their towels and an innocuous-looking book inscribed, in large friendly letters, with the words: DON'T PANIC. The weekend has only just begun . . . With exclusive bonus material from the Douglas Adams archives, and an introduction by former Doctor Who showrunner, Russell T Davies. The intergalactic adventures of Arthur Dent begin in the first volume of the 'trilogy of five', Douglas Adams' comedy sci-fi classic The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

Journey back in time to the faraway Biblical land of Palestine in thirty-something A.D. Experience the greatest story ever told from a unique perspective in this religious parody of a children's game book for adults.In "You Are the Messiah , " take a humorous and irreverant journey through the life of Jesus Christ-the lives he touches, the miracles he executes, and the roads he travels during the most tumultuous period of his life-from the clumsy beginning of his ministry, to the development of his fabled miracle-working powers, and ultimately, to his tortured sacrifice on the cross as he struggles with becoming humanity's unlucky savior.Turn the page, but watch out. The choices made at the end of each plot point can either further the story along the correct path, lead to crazy side stories, or end in a comically brutal death-or much worse.Along the way, you'll get the chance to answer one age-old question: What would Jesus really do?

Life Without the BS is a humorous look at life, marriage, kids, education, and a few other bugaboos including politics, religion, and sex and dating. If you've got an axe to grind against the Obama, Hillary, Rush, or Anne Coulter--we've got you covered there, too. I don't want to give away the farm, but here a few tastes of what you'll find inside. Let me warn--It's finger licking good. Once you start reading you won't want to stop. On people - As Americans, we're guaranteed the right to "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." Only problem is what gets my rocks off doesn't even register on the happiness scale for some crazy ass bastards out there. Believe it or not, people are different, some a little more so than others.

Living on a farm in a remote area of Costa Rica, a little dog writes letters to Granny Gringo in hopes of getting some advice on how to cope with her problems. There are so many animals to deal with and Coco thinks she is the "boss" of Mom and Poppy's Farm. The bulls kick at her, the cat tries to move in the house, new puppies show up, and the chickens seem to be taking over the farm. Full of humor and love, "It's A Dog's Life, by Coco" will keep you laughing.

This is the second story of the adventures of Captain Charisma and his friends. He has to defend his honor against his enemy Captain Chaos. Not only does Captain Charisma battle Captain Chaos everyone else gets involved in something. Can Captain Charisma defeat his enemy and what will happen to the others. Read Captain Charisma takes on Shagwood Country Club to find out the answer to these and other questions.

"T Pot was born in a heavy fog at twilight on a gray ship crossing the international dateline traveling the direction of yesterday at the end of February on one of the leap years in the middle of the last century or so. He was born breech in no country to parents who may have adored him had they survived his birth instead of one day later falling happily tipsy backwards overboard." "A mind which flits aimlessly from one stray thing to another, while it's body is doing whatever, easily spots random interfucking thoughtons instapopping into novel wordimages. Before "mind projectors" all people relied on pencil drawing to record the crazy thoughts gamboling through their heads. Pencil means pensive and inexpensive or tail tip dipped in blood which eventually became pointed wood stick with a graphite-clay core. Technically, T Pot is one of billions of primitive people still employing pencils for prolonging the lives of their thoughts."