Sex and pornography addiction are growing problems that devastate the lives of partners as well as sufferers. Sex Addiction: The Partner's Perspective has been written to help partners and those who care about them to survive the shock of discovering their partner is a sex addict and to help them make decisions about the future of their relationships and their lives. First and foremost, it is a practical book, full of facts, and self help exercises to give partners a much needed sense of stability and control. Like its sister book, Understanding and Treating Sex Addiction, it includes case examples and survey results revealing the reality of life for partners of sex addicts. Sex Addiction: The Partner's Perspective is divided into three parts. Part I explores the myths surrounding sex addiction and provides up to date information about what sex addiction is and what causes it before moving on to explain why the discovery hurts partners so much. Part II is about partners' needs and includes self-help exercises and strategies to help partners regain stability, rebuild self-esteem and consider their future. The controversial topic of co-dependency is also explored with guidance on how to identify it, avoid it and overcome it. Part III focuses on the couple relationship starting with the difficult decision of whether to stay or leave. Whatever the decision, partners will then find help and support for rebuilding trust and reclaiming their sexuality. This book has been written to help partners not only survive, but to grow stronger and move on with their lives - whether alone, or in their relationship. Readers will find revealing statistics and real life stories shared by partners who kindly took part in the first UK survey of sex addiction partners. This book will this book be a valuable guide for partners, but also for the therapists who seek to support them on their journey of recovery.

Since Darwin's day, we've been told that sexual monogamy comes naturally to our species. Mainstream science--as well as religious and cultural institutions--has maintained that men and women evolved in families in which a man's possessions and protection were exchanged for a woman's fertility and fidelity. But this narrative is collapsing. Fewer and fewer couples are getting married, and divorce rates keep climbing as adultery and flagging libido drag down even seemingly solid marriages.

How can reality be reconciled with the accepted narrative? It can't be, according to renegade thinkers Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha. While debunking almost everything we "know" about sex, they offer a bold alternative explanation in this provocative and brilliant book.

Ryan and Jetha's central contention is that human beings evolved in egalitarian groups that shared food, child care, and, often, sexual partners. Weaving together convergent, frequently overlooked evidence from anthropology, archaeology, primatology, anatomy, and psychosexuality, the authors show how far from human nature monogamy really is. Human beings everywhere and in every era have confronted the same familiar, intimate situations in surprisingly different ways. The authors expose the ancient roots of human sexuality while pointing toward a more optimistic future illuminated by our innate capacities for love, cooperation, and generosity.

With intelligence, humor, and wonder, Ryan and Jetha show how our promiscuous past haunts our struggles over monogamy, sexual orientation, and family dynamics. They explore why long-term fidelity can be so difficult for so many; why sexual passion tends to fade even as love deepens; why many middle-aged men risk everything for transient affairs with younger women; why homosexuality persists in the face of standard evolutionary logic; and what the human body reveals about the prehistoric origins of modern sexuality.

In the tradition of the best historical and scientific writing, Sex at Dawn unapologetically upends unwarranted assumptions and unfounded conclusions while offering a revolutionary understanding of why we live and love as we do.

A provocative, moving, kinky, and often absurdly funny memoir about Shakespeare, love, obsession, and spanking When it came to understanding love, a teenage Jillian Keenan had nothing to guide her-until a production of The Tempest sent Shakespeare's language flowing through her blood for the first time. In Sex with Shakespeare, she tells the story of how the Bard's plays helped her embrace her unusual sexual identity and find a love story of her own. Four hundred years after Shakespeare's death, Keenan's smart and passionate memoir brings new life to his work. With fourteen of his plays as a springboard, she explores the many facets of love and sexuality-from desire and communication to fetish and fantasy. In A Midsummer Night's Dream, Keenan unmasks Helena as a sexual masochist-like Jillian herself. In Macbeth, she examines criminalized sexual identities and the dark side of "privacy." The Taming of the Shrew goes inside the secret world of bondage, domination, and sadomasochism, while King Lear exposes the ill-fated king as a possible sexual predator. Moving through the canon, Keenan makes it abundantly clear that literature is a conversation. In Sex with Shakespeare, words are love. As Keenan wanders the world in search of connection, from desert dictatorships to urban islands to disputed territories, Shakespeare goes with her -and provokes complex, surprising, and wildly important conversations about sexuality, consent, and the secrets that simmer beneath our surfaces.

Winner of the 2021 SSTAR Consumer Book Award! What makes sex magnificent? What are the qualities of extraordinary erotic intimacy and what are the elements that help to bring it about? Is great sex the stuff that people remember nostalgically from the "honeymoon" phase of their relationships, or can sex improve over time? Magnificent Sex is based on the largest, in-depth interview study ever conducted with people who are having extraordinary sex. It gathers the nuggets for remarkable sex from the "experts", distilling them into an attainable blueprint for ordinary lovers who want to make erotic intimacy grow over the course of a lifetime. Looking at factors including individual and relational qualities, empathic communication and the myths and realities of magnificent sex, this book offers accessible and evidence-based guidance for lovers and therapists alike. It is replete with frank and often humorous interviews with straight and LGBTQ individuals and couples, those who are "vanilla" and "kinky", monogamous and consensually non-monogamous and healthy and chronically ill. This illuminating book explores the implications of the findings to develop a model that effectively tackles the common problems of low desire and frequency. The "cure" for low desire is to create desirable sex!

In the long and passionate debate within psychoanalysis over the theory of female sexuality, which has spanned more than a century and reached no definitive conclusion, a pattern of non-acceptance of ideas, their disappearance and then re-emergence later is a continually repeating one. The Anatomy of the Clitoris shows how this happens, using a comprehensive guide to the literature. The time is right culturally to explore this further usingclinical material as illustration. The central aim of this book is to introduce recent innovative redrawing of female anatomy appearing in the scientific literature to psychoanalysis.

This accessible book offers effective protocol for engaging in better sexual decision-making in clinical practice. It demonstrates that damaging sexual behaviors are often the result of a process in which a clinician progresses towards the crossing of a client-clinician boundary. Sexual Attraction in Therapy explores state-of-the art research from a multitude of related fields and includes sage advice on how to recognize personal risk factors, manage arousal, identify counterproductive sexual behaviors, and use self-talk to exit sexual situations. Sexual boundary violations usually follow a much longer insidious process and the book carefully discusses and highlights the warning signs for clinicians, which can develop into sexual predicaments affecting their lives and those of their clients, their workplaces and colleagues, and the reputation of the mental health field. Chapters provide essential guidance so that therapists can monitor progress along the 'sexual decision cycle' and, importantly, create organizations far more resistant to poor sexual decision-making. This text is an excellent teaching guide for clinicians and treatment professionals who seek therapeutic growth for both clients and themselves. Clinicians will be able to improve their decision-making and prevent themselves from engaging in damaging sexual behaviors, and organizations can redesign their approach to include preventative practices.

Systemic Sex Therapy, third edition integrates couple and sex therapy to inform the treatment of sexual problems and to give beginning clinicians the abilities and confidence they need to produce change in their patients' lives. Grounded in the Intersystem Approach, the book considers the biology, psychology, couple dyad, family-of-origin, and larger contextual factors of any sexual disorder or issue. Each chapter examines the definition and description of a sexual disorder or issue, its etiology, assessment, treatment, research, and future directions. This thoroughly revised edition presents 18 updated chapters consistent with the DSM-5 and features new content on sexuality and aging, infidelity, sexual interest/arousal disorder, disability, and kink/BDSM. Experts in the field discuss all the major sexual dysfunctions along with new chapters on culture, technology, and their interplay with sexual functioning. An essential text in the field, Systemic Sex Therapy sets out a conceptual framework for graduate students in couple and family therapy programs looking to develop a comprehensive, integrative understanding of sexual issues.

This book bridges the gap between the counsellor and the specialist sex therapist, by providing answers to questions raised by patients or clients about sex, gender and sexuality. It covers physiological information about genitalia, variations on sexuality, the differences between men and women in genital sexual arousal and sexual dysfunctions, an understanding of developmental sexuality and information as to whether the sex discussed is normal or pathological. By having a clearer understanding of usual sexual practices, counsellors can be readily equipped to reassure their clients, or refer to an appropriate person for specialist referral.

Topics covered include physiological difficulties like erectile problems, ejaculatory difficulties, vaginismus and dyspareunia, and loss of sexual desire; gender problems including cross-dressing, transsexualism and intersex; and psychological problems include sexual addiction, fetishism and unusual sexual practices. These are discussed in the context of individual clients and in couple dynamics, and provide a comprehensive reference for the non-specialist mental health professional.

Gender as Soft Assembly weaves together insights from different disciplinary domains to open up new vistas of clinical understanding of what it means to inhabit, to perform, and to be, gendered. Opposing the traditional notion of development as the linear unfolding of predictable stages, Adrienne Harris argues that children become gendered in multiply configured contexts. And she proffers new developmental models to capture the fluid, constructed, and creative experiences of becoming and being gendered. According to Harris, these models, and the images to which they give rise, articulate not only with contemporary relational psychoanalysis but also with recent research into the origins of mentalization and symbolization. In urging us to think of gender as co-constructed in a variety of relational contexts, Harris enlarges her psychoanalytic sensibility with the insights of attachment theory, linguistics, queer theory, and feminist criticism. Nor is she inattentive to the impact of history and culture on gender meanings. Special consideration is given to chaos theory, which Harris positions at the cutting edge of developmental psychology and uses to generate new perspectives and new images for comprehending and working clinically with gender.

The past decade has seen dramatic growth in every area of the prison enterprise. Yet knowledge of the inner life of the prison remains limited. This book redresses this research gap by providing insight into various aspects of the daily life of prison staff. The book provides a serious exploration of their work and, in doing so, draws attention to the variety, value, and complexity of work within prisons. Understanding Prison Staff provides information on relevant research studies, key debates, and on operational and procedural matters. It includes reflective material which academic staff can adopt for core or specialist modules which focus on prison management, prison officer training, and the occupational cultures of prison staff.

Find your own voice

Highly engaging, well-researched, and balanced, this second edition takes a close look at current issues, theory, and research in the psychology of women. You will hear many voices in this text--from women of various racial and cultural backgrounds and social classes, from different sexual orientations, and voices that are young and old and also middle aged. You'll also explore multiple perspectives on issues, so you can draw your own conclusions about the information you're reading, and ultimately find your own voice.

China today is sexually (and in many other ways) a very repressive so ciety, yet ancient China was very different. Some of the earliest surviving literature of China is devoted to discussions of sexual topics, and the sexual implications of the Ym and Yang theories common in ancient China continue to influence Tantric and esoteric sexual practices today far dis tant from their Chinese origins. In recent years, a number of books have been written exploring the history of sexual practices and ideas in China, but most have ended the discussion with ancient China and have not continued up to the present time. Fang Fu Ruan first surveys the ancient assumptions and beliefs, then carries the story to present-day China with brief descriptions of homosexuality, lesbianism, transvestism, transsexualism, and prostitution, and ends with a chapter on changing attitudes toward sex in China today. Dr. Ruan is well qualified to give such an overview. Until he left China in the 1980s, he was a leader in attempting to change the repressive attitudes of the government toward human sexuality. He wrote a best selling book on sex in China, and had written to and corresponded with a number of people in China who considered him as confidant and ad visor about their sex problems. A physician and medical historian, Dr. Ruan's doctoral dissertation was a study of the history of sex in China."

Adam Phillips uses the idea of flirtation to explore the virtues of being uncommitted - to people, to ideas, to methods - and the pleasures of uncertainty. These buoyant essays promote a psychoanalysis with a light touch, a psychoanalysis for pleasure and curiosity. 'In On Flirtation, he has again deployed all his erudition and perception to beguiling effect . . . Adam Phillips may well be one of our greatest contemporary psychoanalytic thinkers.' Independent on Sunday

Why are there two sexes? How different are they and why? Why can't a woman be more like a man? Or should the question be: why can't a man be more like a woman? Controversy rages around sex and gender, but just what are the differences and how are they determined? Lewis Wolpert, distinguished scientist, broadcaster and author, has tackled depression, religion and old age from a developmental biologist's perspective. Now he enters the gender debate, starting with his argument that men are fundamentally modified females - if the genes present at fertilisation did not do their job properly, we would all be women - and journeying through MRI techniques, the nature of sexual attraction, 'neurosexism' and whether men are really better at maths. With fresh and persuasive research and with his customary intelligence and curiosity, Lewis Wolpert sets out to make his mark on this controversial topic - and makes some surprising discoveries along the way.

A comprehensive British volume on lesbian and gay affirmative psychotherapy has been a while coming. Pink Therapy, however, has arrived, amply fills this gap, and is well worth the wait. The literature reviews are masterful for scholars, and the book offers a comprehensive, thoughtful approach for clinicians. A deft editorial hand is evident in the unusual consistency across chapters, the uniformly crisp, helpful chapter summaries, and the practical appendices, generous resources lists and well organized bibliographies. <BR" particularly like the contributors subtle appreciation of theoretical nuance, genuine open-mindedness to diversity of ideas, and willingness to synthesize in a pragmatic and client-oriented manner. <BR>John C. Gonsiorek, PhD., Minneapolis, MN USA; Diplomate in Clinical Psychology, American Board of Professional Psychology; Past President, Society for the Psychological Study of Lesbian and Gay Issues (Division 44 of the American Psychological Association). <BR>Pink Therapy is the first British guide for counsellors and therapists working with people who are lesbian, gay or bisexual. It provides a much needed overview of lesbian, gay and bisexual psychology, and examines some of the differences between lesbians, gays and bisexuals, and heterosexuals. Pink Therapy proposes a model of gay affirmative therapy, which challenges the prevailing pathologizing models. It will help to provide answers to pressing questions such as: <BR>*what is different about lesbian, gay and bisexual psychologies? <BR>*how can I improve my work with lesbian, gay and bisexual clients? <BR>*what are the key clinical issues that this work raises? <BR>The contributors draw on their wide range ofpractical experience to provide - in an accessible style - information about the contemporary experience of living as a lesbian, gay or bisexual person, and to explore some of the common difficulties. <BR>Pink Therapy will be important reading for students and practitioners of counselling and psychotherapy, and will also be of value to anyone involved in helping people with a lesbian, gay or bisexual orientation.

Mindfulness represents the most significant shift in the world of counselling and psychotherapy within the last decade. Mindful approaches have been hailed as the 'third wave' of cognitive behavioural-therapy and mindfulness has been recommended - and found to be effective at treating - a wide variety of mental health issues. There has been a proliferation of popular self-help books based on mindfulness approaches, and much debate between western mindfulness practitioners and Buddhist scholars about the ways in which mindful theory and practice is being adapted for western audiences. To date, however, there has been relatively little research or writing considering the potentials of mindfulness for the arena of sexual and relationship therapy. This book aims to address this by bringing together many of the key practitioners and researchers who are working in this area. The book presents a range of perspectives on what mindful theory and practice has to offer to our understandings of, and work with, sex and relationships. This book was originally published as a special issue of Sexual and Relationship Therapy.

Written in an accessible but scholarly manner, this is the first British-edited and authored collection on lesbian and gay psychology.

'Thoughtful, lucid and blessedly free of therapese . . . Weber's book is a powerful snapshot into the little bombs going off in the lives and homes of those around us' SUNDAY TIMES 'Finely crafted, profound and always generous . . . Made me feel excited to be alive' NATASHA LUNN Our secret wants and desires are often hidden in a box. But what happens when you lift the lid? Chloe is beautiful and fiercely bright, but her thirst for alcohol and attention is insatiable. Sara resents being tied down to anything, but part of her craves stability. Elliot is secretly grieving the death of his famous lover and feels like he's invisible. The lives and problems of psychotherapist Charlotte Fox Weber's clients vary, but all are united by a common question: what do I really want? In What We Want, Charlotte Fox Weber takes us on a journey through twelve universal wants and desires - love, power, sex, attention, and more - bringing us behind the closed doors of her practice. As she gently guides her clients towards a deeper understanding of themselves, she invites them - and us - to find a fuller way of living. What We Want is at once a fly-on-the-wall look at what binds us all, an expression of the profound importance of understanding and articulating our desires, and a practical toolkit for living well. More Love for What We Want: 'Insightful and deeply empathetic . . . Offers hope that we can actually get better' PAMELA DRUCKERMAN 'Will surely convince even the most sceptical critic that effective counselling can truly transform lives' CHRISTIE TATE