What is Nice Guy Syndrome?

Nice Guy Syndrome is an affliction where a heterosexual male is frustrated because he finds himself caged within the friend zone of women he'd prefer to be dating. Often, he is a kind and sympathetic person who listens well, and lends a shoulder for women to cry on. He's loved and admired, but not the type of fellow women sleep with.If there is a hell, this is it, and I'm in the penthouse.

I was raised to be a nice guy. My relatives and teachers instilled in me the importance of: Treating women gentlyProtecting and providing for womenListening to women without judgingUnderstanding what it is women want, even when they don't say the wordsOpening and holding doors for womenHandling certain tasks for womenWriting love notes to womenComplimenting women

I'm a master of the above and, thereby, block my own access to the physical parts of women I long for.

So, what's a nice guy to do? Should I shed my skin, get a Harley and tattoos, lose all concern for how I'm perceived, and begin banging lonely chicks by the dozen, just to please my pecker? I can't do it. All I can do is vent, and hope someday, some woman will realize she deserves something better than bad boy bruises.Women love it.

"Only in the head of Mr. Torcivia will you find such a mix of wise truth about men and their behavior. Don't read this smut in the middle of the airport, LOL, or you will find your face turning the same color as this book cover." - Cathy Cook

"Congrats to Phil Torcivia on the newest book Here's hoping I don't get my Kindle taken away from me by my Doctor's assistant for giggling too loudly in the exam room." - Anita-Michelle Miller

"Phil's day to day kindness and sharing of relationships knows no bounds. I most definitely did not believe in the Nice Guy Syndrome until this book. Romantic, delicious with a touch of intrigue and blood." - Gracey CastroRead this book and laugh with (not at) me.

Seriously. I'm fragile. Be nice, dammit I promise a giggle or two from me to you.

Everyone knows Uber drivers are expected to be courteous and attentive, both to their passengers and to those on the road. They are not expected to accept that invitation to the swinger party, flee the scene of a fatal accident, nor are they expected to be a convicted felon on probation. Unfortunately, this Joe Schmo is not your everyday Uber driver. I began sharing rides with the audacious hope to one day escape the road blocks stalling my merger onto the freeway of creative success. But when a typical shift U-turns into a series of detours involving herpes ridden riders, sexy sorority sisters, and blundering bank robbers, I arrive (at gunpoint) miles from my desired destination. ""Rideshares, Wrecks, and Sex: Confessions of a Convicted Uber Driver"" is based upon actual events that transpired over the year that I covertly drove for Uber while on probation. I confesses outlandish details in a highlight reel of wrecks (both car and train) and sex, effectively answering ""What's your craziest story?""

Dedication: To the many single guys out there who know a good book about attracting babely chicks when they see one (that's pronounced "babe-lee" for future reference - meaning a superdy-duperly good looking chick). Please No female readers ...Well, I guess it's okay if you're already married or going steady or if you are passing the information on to your sons or brothers. DISCLAIMER: It is highly recommended that wives not buy this book containing over 3,000 words, for their husbands. This is a "single man's guide" and I, Percyvelle Pennington the Third, will not be held responsible for any undesired results that might occur, should this ebook make its way into the wrong hands Thank you. Table of Contents: Chapter One - Tell Chicks Who You are Interested in, that You are an Heir to the Bill Gates Fortune Chapter Two - Tell Your Babely Love Interest that You are a Cousin to Elvis Presley or Some Other Male Sex Symbol Chapter Three - Convince Chicks that You are Sensitive and In Touch with Your Feminine Side Chapter Four - Make Sure that They See You are Athletic and Demonstrate Your Manly Bravery to Them Chapter Five - Prove to Your 'Attractee' that You are Not Still Dependent on Your Mother WARNING: Please use your newly-gained male prowess in a responsible manner because I will not be held responsible for the many broken hearts you are about to cause in your own community (in addendum to the previous "DISCLAIMER") **The History Behind these Comedy/Satire Books**: While my largest base of book titles are on health disorder subjects, I also have a significant number of business-related titles published, as well as many on Christian Bible theology. Before I began publishing in any of these serious genres, which I do feel are my most important ones, I tried my hand at comedy via online articles I wrote in years previous (I created a few short stories during this period as well). Having kept these comedy pieces I wrote, in saved files after taking them offline, I decided to revive them by publishing them in eBook and paperback form. I did have to tweak them and edit them a bit but I managed to give them all that Percy P. III flavor. Of course as real the writer of them (James M. Lowrance), I think they're pretty funny and relatives who I shared them with, confirmed this evaluation -- so I decided to offer them to the world. With them being so different from my serious subject books, I assigned a pen name to them as well, being "Percyvelle Pennington the Third." He seems more like the guy who wrote them, than I do. Percy is a snide type guy and he is arrogant; traits that I hopefully never display in real life He does make his points known in his memoirs but in strangely comical ways. A "cheerful heart is a good medicine" according to the Holy Bible, and "laughter is the best medicine" according to Reader's Digest. My thoughts were, that if I could take a few serious or controversial subjects via my compiled articles and create a little comedy from them that makes people smile or laugh, it would be something worth publishing. With the debates going on within these subjects, between people expressing the pros and cons of them, it is my hope that I can lighten the rhetoric a bit by injecting some humor into them. These booklets ARE NOT intended to offend anyone and if you'll notice, I make fun of everyone in them, via my alter writing personality -- Percy P. III. It is my hope that readers find the medicine of laughter and cheer within the pages of them, so that they can escape the stressors of life for just a little while

To comedians, 'material'--their jokes--has always been precious, worthy of protecting and preserving. On stage, a good vaudeville routine could last years as it was performed on tour across the country. On radio, a year's vaudeville material might be fodder for one week's broadcast. Bob Hope used new material not only for his weekly radio series, but also for the several live charity appearances he made each week.
Organized by the stages of his life, accompanied by black-and-white photographs, this book gives readers a chance to enjoy the very best of Hope's jokes, from his early years in vaudeville, his top-rated radio show in the '30s and '40s, his legendary television appearances, and much more.

Ambrose Bierce's classic collection of witty and satirical definitions, arranged alphabetically as a dictionary, is presented here in full. Known as a hero for his actions in the American Civil War, Bierce distinguished himself later in life as a barbed commentator who would turn his ire to all sorts of topics. Today, most of his journalism and opinion pieces are consigned to obscurity. Lasting fame however was gained from the Devil's Dictionary; wherein Bierce redefines popular terms in a deeply sardonic, even bitter, manner. The Devil's Dictionary is, as the title suggests, full of dark and devilish humor. For instance, it describes the Adam's Apple as a ""protuberance on the throat of a man, thoughtfully provided by Nature to keep the rope in place."" and marriage as a ""state of temporary insanity only cured by the passage of time.""

Every woman has either dated a jerk, or knows a friend that has dated one. But avoiding the jerks and attracting a decent man is actually a lot easier than you think. Forget watching reruns of "Sex and the City" or chatting with your girlfriends late at night. In this guidebook, a self-professed jerk comes straight out, speaks the truth, and systematically explains how to spot, avoid, and say goodbye to jerks; tell if a guy is wasting your time; deal with players hunt for "good" men (and where to hunt for them). You'll also learn how to avoid common mistakes, such as overrating initial chemistry, inadvertently hurting a man's ego, losing a good guy's interest and much more. Full of witty satire and sarcasm. Get ready to laugh out loud with this hilarious "anti-game." What people had to say about this book: "Hey Willie, this is so entertaining Ha ha you have a great sense of humor, and your statements are so true " - Denise "We all know no one likes a tattletale. Hate the game, not the player. Every girl Tiger slept with knew he was married. Who is worse?" - Steve the player "That was such an enjoyable and enlightening read. I mean it's well written, witty, and one would think some of it is common sense, but sometimes people (i.e. me ) need common sense to slap them in the face " - Cheryl "Willie whistle blower has a nice ring to it. You know someone's going to kick your butt one day? Good work " - A guy Willie no longer parties with "I don't understand you. You go through university, build a promising career. Now you quit your job and write this book? Why would you tell the whole world you're an asshole?" - Willie's mom

The world's most beloved beagle shares his philosophy on life in this beautifully produced gift book for all generations. In his inimitable style, Snoopy spends his days extolling the virtues of dancing, hanging out with his best bird friend Woodstock, pursuing a full supper dish and giving his owner - our favourite lovable loser, Charlie Brown - the run-around. For the millions of faithful Charles Schulz fans, and those who fondly remember the joyful dog with the wild imagination, this is the first in a new series to cherish that will see the beguiling Peanuts gang share their sentiments on everything from food to friendship.

Dee Quemby's book is not just a wonderfully warm read but a very actual account of the most demanding and difficult life in show business, that of the COMEDIAN! I told Dee many moons ago that she should enter the idiom that is the easiest life in showbusiness, that of the TV drama actor. That of course she has done to grand acclaim. Get the book it's a great read! BILL maynard Deirdre was my first dancing teacher for 13 years and I owe her a great debt. She is a very talented performer in her own right and it would be great to dance with her again. I still think there's something very big around the corner for her! Stephen Mear (Olivier winning choreographer of Mary Poppins) Dee was brilliant as Emmerdale's Lulu Dingle. But if she'd had access to Lulu's crystal ball and been able to see how tough it would be for a mainstream comedienne to get a break in modern TV, would she have persevered? Dee's book is moving, honest and funny. Garry Bushell (tv critic)

Humorist and wordsmith extraordinaire Matthew Goldberg shares over two hundred and fifty fake words for others to learn and use as they attempt to heal themselves from "carpool tunnel syndrome, " battle strange hankerings for good old-fashioned "Talibanjo" music, and watch helplessly as their dogs conk out from "barkolepsy."Goldberg was unintentionally born into a family that has always used words creatively and he relies on his internal artistic fire to share both one-word and multiple-word entries, called wordapods. While introducing such words and phrases as "boredello, anthropomurphic, " and "hit-and-shun" accident, Goldberg includes definitions, sample sentences, ways to master the word, and trivia that will both entertain and inform. Goldberg interviews dozens of fascinating characters that help define the words including Vegestarian Mars Greenman, Pastafari Scholar Tosh Kingsmon, and baseball fan and original "boob bird" Clara Heatley.Meant for the creative word enthusiast, the budding "semantician, " and for anyone with a good sense of humor, "Wordapodia: Volume One" provides a unique compilation of new words, fun facts, and observations. So, hold your breath, grab on to your "caribooster seat, " and get ready for a wild ride through one man's imagination.