Shakespeare applied to stupid statements made by Liberals, political, lawyer, and other jokes. Also, Shakespeare applied to current issues. Formatted in four columns: Who or issue; They said, deed, joke, or author's comment; Shakespeare quotes; and Source of Shakespeare quotes.

For those of you who grew up in the 50s, 60s, and 70s, this book is for you. Wayne Danka grew up with the best bunch of friends a guy could have. Professional mischief-makers and best friends to the end, Wayne and his buddies were always trying to get the most fun out of life they possibly could. Meeting gangsters, hustling gamblers, and encountering ruthless thugs make up just a few of the stories that will make you laugh out loud as you take a trip down memory lane. A collection of short stories about growing up, coming of age, maturity, and immaturity during the three greatest decades of the 20th century. Author Bio: Wayne Frank Danka grew up in Trenton, New Jersey. His next book is based on his adventures mingling with the inner circle of the Playboy Empire. Wayne managed the Phoenix Playboy Club in Arizona for five years and is now a representative for buyers of fine precious diamonds. He currently lives in Scottsdale, Arizona.

Mixing dinosaurs, counting and bedtime, children will love this brilliantly fun board book with a shiny silver foiled cover! Once upon a bedtime, these children could not sleep, so their helpful mums and daddies said that they should count some sheep. Though children think that sheep are nice, there's something they like more, so instead of counting lots of sheep, they counted DINOSAURS! What's the best way to help little ones fall asleep? Introduce them to super cute dinosaurs, of course! And with stomping, laughing and mischievous dinosaurs on every page, and a fun story showing children how to count from one to twenty, this chunky, child-friendly board book is set to become every child's new favourite. The perfect board book for children, especially dinosaur-loving ones! Chunky board book with shiny silver on the cover Helps children learn how to count from one to twenty Brilliantly fun story and beautiful, full-colour illustrations The perfect first-gift for children Encourages children to love counting as much as they love dinosaurs!

In "For Play, " a former pro basketball player shares a collection of sexual learning experiences gathered over a thirty-year period, beginning with the sexual revolution. When they first met, Will McMasters and Jack Callahan were just a couple of college guys who somehow managed to fumble their away around in the bedroom. As both began to sexually mature, Will married Cynthia while Jack launched an unforgettable journey of sexual freedom that soon included his married friends. As McMasters relays true stories of voyeurism, threesomes, and exhibitionism, he presents a variety of lovemaking ideas and sexual techniques that will encourage lovers to open their minds and bodies to new possibilities and ultimately pursue better sex lives. "For Play" shares the candid, erotic, and sometimes humorous portrayal of the journey of two friends whose experiences will help others learn how to relax, have great sex, and discover more rewarding relationships in the process.

42 Things to do When You're the Last Man on Earth is NOT - we repeat NOT - a "how to" book. If you happen to find yourself alone on the planet and you are armed only with your wits and this novel you are in serious trouble. Though before you die a horrible death we hope you take time to read the swiftly moving science fiction comedy novel about a security guard who wakes up one morning to discover everyone else on the planet had left. Now he, his super advanced talking sneakers, and a couple of other stragglers must figure out how and why everyone else left while battling evil cows, insane civil servants, and other nasty surprises. This will most likely be the most powerful book you have ever read that features talking sneakers.

Marty is a Professional Bus / Shuttle Driver and has been driving for many years. His occupation is one that puts him up front and personal with a special sector of our society; Bus Passengers. Over the years he has accumulated an assortment of short stories while driving a city transit bus; he wishes to share these stories with you. Many of these stories are serious while others are mind boggling, hilarious or just make you say, "Oh my gosh; what were they thinking." He has written this book using the following parameters: there are no swear words in this book (He doesn't need to use profanity to get his point across); he does not identify any ethnic backgrounds of the people in his stories (Marty wants people to view people without prejudice and bias) and lastly he was honest and told the truth to the best of his ability (By doing this he has found out that people don't like the truth and will go to extremes to avoid it.) Marty's' writings are unique because he writes like he talks. He does this so that he can relate to anybody who has ever told a story. The stories that he tells are inspirational, motivational and humorous. He has become a Master Story Teller and shares his stories with all who will listen. So get on board; Put your fare in the box; Grab a seat and be prepared for the ride of your life "HEY, I'M MARTY. I DRIVE THE BUS " BOOK I is currently being sold worldwide.

Fifty naughty satires that break new ground and brighten your day with tongue-in-cheek observations you can't find anywhere else, not even on "Saturday Night Live" or "Mad TV: " *Politics and Politicians *Famous Writers *Child Beauty Pageants *Modern Art *TV Commercials *Canadian Shopping *TV Reality Shows *Liberals and Left-Wingers *Public Television *Famous Talk-Show Hosts *Government Bureaucrats *Modern Music *Miss America Pageant *Home Shopping Network *Pornography *Religion *Movie and TV Stars *Travel Articles *Sports *And Much, Much More...

It is1972 in the United Kingdom and the Prime Minister, Ted Heath, is declaring a three day working week and a State of Emergency as the Coalminer s Strike begins to bite. Abba are topping the charts and Monty Python s Flying Circus are offering us something completely different on BBC2. Behind the backdrop of this we follow John Caswell, a football mad 15 year old from the Midlands as he embarks on his fi nal year at Kettering Grammar School. We suffer with him as he agonizes over his O levels in the summer of 1973 culminating in mixed results and fi nds himself working in an offi ce in a Builders Merchants with little idea of how his life is going to take off. Later that year John meets and becomes totally infl uenced by his sister s boyfriend who is in the Merchant Navy. Convinced this is the life for him John then goes to the National Sea Training School in Gravesend and we follow his exciting passage through the three month Lifeboat and Effi cient Deck Hand course before embarking on his fi rst trip to sea in September 1974 onboard the Anco Empress . We then follow him on an adventure across the oceans and upon the high seas around the World, crossing the Equator, learning his new skills and transforming a shy, timid and naive young man into an adult via Rotterdam, Montreal, New York, New Orleans, Rio De Janeiro, Durban and back to Rotterdam with hilarious and embarrassing consequences as he comes to terms with his ever changing environments and the social demands of a work hard / play hard regime.

Most of these stories are true. Some are fabrications. "The Gun Show" is one. It is a loose interpretation of an event. If you are familiar with the event, you will understand the satire. The stories, such as "The Great Possum Slayer," tell of a hunting adventure. We are all guilty of doing something to a friend in the name of fun. "The night Before Christmas" describes a practical joke that turned out better than planned Several stories, as an example, "BB'S & Bumblebees," reflect on our desire to imitate our parents. Several of the stories convey a safety message. "The Hazards of Plastic Bullets," is an example that shows what can happen in the blink of an eye when we choose to disregard a simple safety statement. Some of the stories deal with older people and a time not so long ago. These people believed that you took care of your problem. You will notice in these stories, the problem would have gone away or been taken care of long before law enforcement could arrive. With our modern communications we can now summon the Calvary in an instant. It has not been too long ago that this was not the case in a lot of areas of our great nation. "The Letter," is an adaptation of a letter I want read at my funeral. Surprise, fear, courage, fortitude and a child's belief that they are bullet proof are all expressed in stories in this book. A book of this nature easily causes us to reflect on our lives and events that have slipped into our fading memory. If this book reminds a single individual of any similar events in their past, makes them a safer individual, or makes them laugh it will have succeed in its purpose beyond expectations.

FIRST BOOK EVER THAT MUST BE READ CLOCK WISE... You want drama, entertainment, anger, humor and education all at the same time This creative emotional selection of rhyming poems are confined from dreams, ideas, family, friends, strangers and Antoinette Faine's own life experiences. Also inspired by the book "Sweetness was my Weakness" where a older female falls in love with a younger man then finds out she got more than she bargain for. Throughout the story the main characters thoughts are in rhyming poetry similar to the poems in this book. Breakfast time, bedtime or just for fun... After you read this please pray to the sun... About this book tell everyone... Enjoy it because there is more to come... Thanking you, you and you a million...

From playing hopscotch on the black and white tiles of the kitchen floor, attempting a stealth purchase of feminine protection for his wife, imitating Mighty Mouse by saving the day each morning as he bounds down the stairs or secretly being taped by Dateline NBC as he watches a "Monday Night Football" game, Heidi Rice's husband, who she affectionately calls "husband-head," is an eight-year-old, football addict trapped in a man's body and a great subject for a humor columnist. For ten years, Heidi Rice has entertained readers of all ages with her weekly "Fried Rice" humor column in the Glenwood Springs (Colo.) Post Independent, detailing life with her spouse. Now peer into the lives of the Rice's-a baby boomer couple who don't have babies but share a lot of laughs-in this sixty-column collection of her favorites. From football to family, housekeeping to holidays, there is something in Skully Says Shut It! that will assure you that (sigh) you aren't the only weirdoes in the world.

The White Anglo-Saxon Protestant Bachelor's Survival Guide and Cookbook is the hilarious story of one man's attempt to grow up in America's Heartland--with recipes tribute to family, friends, females and food as an example to uncertain young men everywhere--and to the patient people who love them. opener.

When The Life of Brian was first released in 1979 it was hailed by most as Monty Python's finest parody and denounced by a few as the most blasphemous film of all time. But, with its unforgettable songs and its infinitely quotable script it has gone on to become an enduring cult classic.