There are strange goings-on once again in Middleburg. Someone has put up posters warning townspeople that the dreaded Indiana Aztec bat has been sighted in the area. What's more, the town is in an uproar over the bells recently placed in the church belfry that chime every hour -- twenty-four hours a day It seems the whole town is going batty with the constant pealing
Bernie Magruder is determined to get to the bottom of things. Who put up all those posters about a species of bat no one has ever heard of? What can the townspeople do to return some peace to their lives? And are the bats that Bernie and his family see swooping about the belfry the dreaded Indiana Aztecs? Looks like Bernie, and his two friends Georgene and Weasel, have their work cut out for them again

?I cherish the fun times/laughs I have with my friend/publicist Holly, who is always so ?Jolley.? Just being in her presence makes me feel comfortable and at home - like I?ve known her a million years. I know her readers are going to feel the same. The way she words and writes things is in such a smart, but understanding way, no matter the age or the maturity level - it always leaves you wanting more.? ?Paul Jolley (American Idol - Season 12, Top 9 Finalist) ?Holly writes truthful and sincere. I know her writing comes from her heart and her experiences just from knowing her. She was the first one to write up an article about me and my hometown. Very excellent writer. Emm Hmmm.? ?Duck Dynasty's Mountain Man Are you tired of ?How-to? dating books? Well, this is not one of them. Holly Marie Tong's Chick Flicks Lie (Sugar-free Accounts of a Positive Pessimist) features laughable and engaging stories which are relative of today's dating world. Deep down, we all want the kind of love that would chase our departing plane down the tarmac and the kind of love that would try to win us back no matter what the cost. However, real life is often a far cry from a chick flick, and there isn't any background music to accompany it. With sharp wit, continual sarcasm, and non-stop humor, Chick Flicks Lie reminds the single crowd that they aren't alone. The empathetic author believes faith mixed with laughter to be the best medicine for lousy dates and failed relationships. This feel-good book will leave singles feeling understood, while giving them a whole new perspective.

Ponder, if you will ... Where do you find fascinating explanations for a multitude of mysteries? Why do pianos have 88 keys? How does the hole get in the needle of a syringe? Why is peanut butter sticky?

Pop culture guru David Feldman demystifies these questions and much more in Do Elephants Jump? One of the Imponderables(R) series -- the unchallenged source of answers to civilization's everyday mysteries -- and charmingly illustrated by Kassie Schwan, this book provides you with small mysteries that puzzle and amaze us.

Every woman has either dated a jerk, or knows a friend that has dated one. But avoiding the jerks and attracting a decent man is actually a lot easier than you think. Forget watching reruns of "Sex and the City" or chatting with your girlfriends late at night. In this guidebook, a self-professed jerk comes straight out, speaks the truth, and systematically explains how to spot, avoid, and say goodbye to jerks; tell if a guy is wasting your time; deal with players hunt for "good" men (and where to hunt for them). You'll also learn how to avoid common mistakes, such as overrating initial chemistry, inadvertently hurting a man's ego, losing a good guy's interest and much more. Full of witty satire and sarcasm. Get ready to laugh out loud with this hilarious "anti-game." What people had to say about this book: "Hey Willie, this is so entertaining Ha ha you have a great sense of humor, and your statements are so true " - Denise "We all know no one likes a tattletale. Hate the game, not the player. Every girl Tiger slept with knew he was married. Who is worse?" - Steve the player "That was such an enjoyable and enlightening read. I mean it's well written, witty, and one would think some of it is common sense, but sometimes people (i.e. me ) need common sense to slap them in the face " - Cheryl "Willie whistle blower has a nice ring to it. You know someone's going to kick your butt one day? Good work " - A guy Willie no longer parties with "I don't understand you. You go through university, build a promising career. Now you quit your job and write this book? Why would you tell the whole world you're an asshole?" - Willie's mom

'Absorbing, funny and oh-so-romantic. I loved every page!'When Lily's husband dies, she moves to the edge of a tiny village, settling into a solitary life, her only real company her brother and his family. A quiet life becomes her safe space, with no risk of getting hurt. When her brother offers her spare room to his oldest friend, Jack, Lily's reluctant - but knowing how much she owes her family, can't say no. A lodger takes some getting used to but to her surprise, Lily begins to enjoy Jack's company. Slowly but surely, Jack encourages Lily to step outside her comfort zone. But taking risks means facing the consequences, and telling people how she really feels, means Lily might have to face losing them. But as the saying goes - you only live once - and being brave could mean Lily gets a second chance at love... 'Read yourself happy' with Maxine Morrey's latest feel-good, unforgettable and utterly uplifting love story, guaranteed to make you smile. Perfect for fans of Mhairi McFarlane and Sophie Kinsella. Praise for Maxine Morrey: 'An uplifting read that stops you in your tracks and makes you wonder "....but what if?" Absorbing, funny and oh-so-romantic, I loved every page!' Rachel Burton 'A super sweet read, guaranteed to warm any winter evening' Samantha Tonge 'A lovely story that kept me turning the pages' Jules Wake 'A stunning, perfect novel - it literally took my breath away.' The Writing Garnet, 5 stars 'A warm hug of a book.' Rachel's Random Reads, 5 stars

The line began forming after eight o'clock. Sal, short and heavy-set, kept everyone busy. Neat, in a white shirt and sports jacket, with his grey fedora cocked to the side, his crooked grin made you smile. Without warning the heavy door would swing open and the waiters would come outside to join him. They were dressed in pajamas or prison garb, with hats and horns, and were there to warm up the crowd. Some in line expected this, others were shocked.

The pink polka dot building should have been a warning. Complete strangers in line became chummy, exchanging stories they had heard; toilet seat covers to serve drinks on, microphones in the ladies room, toilet paper for napkins. Most had brought their friends there to be roasted. The line of people varied in age. They all dressed casually because they'd heard you could get a pie in the face or a squirt in the eye. The club's routines were blue in color, but harmless. If you were lucky you might see a "Balls for the Queen" or a "Singing beer." The price was always right for a good time and Warm Beer and Lousy Food was the place to be.

What is the one true secret to weight loss? What is the correct way to make a grilled cheese sandwich? Is the designated hitter rule the salvation of baseball or its undoing? Is it rational to be an optimist? And-the question that haunts us all- should toilet paper unwind over the top of the roll or from underneath?

In his first collection of essays, author Brian Kenneth Swain tackles hundreds of life's questions while exploring a vast array of subjects-from tubas to two year-olds, from field goals to child labor laws, and from high school shop class to the worst round of golf ever played. With an acerbic wit and an honest approach, Swain shares his perspective on such pivotal matters as how to ski without losing a limb or your self-esteem, how to correctly prepare and consume lobster according to Maine standards, and whether marketing ploys hypnotically convince consumers to replace perfectly functioning items without a second thought. Swain encourages a kind of tongue-in-cheek thinking that prompts us to take a second look at the world around us.

"The Curious Habits of Man" shares an amusing glimpse at life as one man contemplates many of our greatest-and smallest-questions.

Covering all the catastrophes, conundrums, foibles, and fantasies of a tumultuous 12 months, this anthology brings together South Africa's most prominent cartoonists--from the old guard of Dov Fedler, Fred Mouton, and Tony Grogan to the groundbreaking new generation led by Brandan Reynolds, Sifiso Yalo, and Jeremy Nell--to create a pungent potpourri of the year's best political cartoons. Discerning cartoon readers and politically aware individuals will find caricatures created from the top headlines over the past year, including Mbeki's global meltdown, President Obama's election, the Gaza bombings, Somali pirates, swine flu, Mugabe's madness, the Dalai Lama's no-show, Eskom excuses, and much more.