The story of John Wesley's affair with Grace Murray and how Charles
Wesley prevented their marriage by persuading Grace to marry John
Bennet, who was one of the key Methodist lay preachers, has long
fascinated historians, but most have tended to view John as the
victim and been hugely critical of the behaviour and actions of the
others involved. Grace has been described as 'impetuous, imperious,
and probably a little unstable' and as an 'uneducated, vain,
fickle, selfish and presuming' flirt, even though this does not tie
in with either John Wesley's or John Bennet's view of her. Bennet
has been dismissed as 'a cheat' and 'a treacherous, unfriendly
man', even though Charles Wesley, George Whitefield and other
contemporaries consistently praised his character. Charles has been
accused of over-reacting to gossip and acting out of personal
reasons. It has been alleged, for example, that he wanted John to
remain single so he could retain the income his own wife required,
and that both he and his wife were too snobbish to want to have
Grace as their sister-in-law. All these accusations have tended to
obscure rather than clarify what really happened because they
either ignore or do not pay enough attention to the fact that John
Wesley was just as much to blame for what happened.Today, after
decades of relative historical neglect, Grace Murray is beginning
to receive more recognition as 'a strong-willed, capable and
dedicated woman worthy of a distinguished place in the annals of
early Methodism'. What emerges from this study is a remarkable
woman - a pioneer female class leader and preacher, who, throughout
her life, had to come to terms not only with the doubts and fears
that can beset Christians at times, but also with the prejudices of
her day. Dr Johnson represented those well when he quipped: 'A
woman preaching is like a dog walking on its hind legs. It is not
done well; but you are surprised to find it done at all.' What
comes across most strongly in Grace's writings is her acute
awareness of her own failings and her abiding faith in the
redemptive love of God. When she knew she was approaching death she
wrote to her son:'God did wonders for me all my life. I have been
astonished and overwhelmed with a sense of his love to me the chief
of sinners, the most unfaithful and unprofitable of all his
servants.'Her character makes it all the more understandable why
John Wesley was hit so hard by her loss and why he struggled to
understand why God had not permitted him to marry her:The main
outcome of Grace's marriage to John Bennet has usually been
portrayed as being John Wesley's disastrous marriage on the rebound
to Molly Vazeille, but of far more significance was the divide her
loss created between John and Charles. That had huge and important
repercussions on the way in which Methodism was subsequently to
develop.After the initial trauma was over both John Wesley and
Grace Murray came to believe that it was God who had prevented
their marriage. In a more secular age, it seems preferable to
explain what happened by looking at the actions of people involved
and using the evidence available. This book tries to do exactly
that and what emerges is a tragedy of errors for which all the
protagonists can be held equally responsible. John Wesley, Grace
Murray, John Bennet, and Charles Wesley all did what they did for
the best, if at times misguided, motives. Whether the hand of God
can also be seen in what happened is left to the reader's
judgement.
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