Meet Little Penis, the cute dinky winky you bring to life when you put your finger in the puppet in this delightfully crass and hilarious parody board book for adults.
This board book parodies children's finger puppet books with its bold colors and simple illustrations, but this book is not for children Instead, put your finger in the hole in the back of the book, and follow the adventures of Little Penis as he goes swimming (poor shrinking Penis ); gets out of bed early, so big and tall; gets a gentle kiss and hug (along with a good hard tug); head to a bar, gets drunk, and hooks up; and more--getting bigger and bigger with the turn of each page. Sometimes he's up and sometimes he's down, but there's a happy ending as he finds his snug, warm place called home

A hilarious, fully illustrated book full of tongue-in-cheek advice for surviving life as a dog parent – the perfect gift for any dog lover You have the best dog in the world, it’s true. But there’s no avoiding the fact that, perfect and adorable as they may be, there are certain elements of being a pup owner that you could do without. That smell they bring in when they’ve rolled in fox poo. The nibble-marks on your furniture. Their fur stuck to absolutely every black item of clothing you own. Luckily, this no-nonsense guide is here to teach you all the tricks you’ll ever need to help you navigate life with your furry friend, so you can focus on the positives – like giving them head-scritches and nose-boops every time they prove they’re a good doggo at heart. With pearls of wisdom like these, you’ll be a pro dog parent in no time: Remember to check the dog is in the room before blaming it for your fart It is a truth universally acknowledged that a dog in possession of a healthy libido must be in want of a leg Start working on your mental toughness – those puppy-dog eyes are enough to break even the iciest of hearts

‘The game isn’t what it seems from the outside. The game isn’t quite what I was expecting. The game doesn’t always work like the people on television think it does. The game is better, worse and stranger than you can imagine, and that is coming from someone who saw it all with their own eyes.’ Ever wondered what really goes on inside a Premier League dressing room, what it’s like to train under Roy Hodgson, Roberto Mancini and Fabio Capello – and what happens when you kick a sandwich at one of them? When it comes to football, former Manchester City and England star Micah Richards has seen it all – and laughed about most of it. In The Game, Micah shares his funniest and frankest stories from on and off the pitch, be it arriving at his first England training session with two left boots, attempting to supervise the infamous Mario Balotelli or winding up Roy Keane on Super Sunday. From how he spent his first Premier League paycheque and how he prepared – financially and mentally – for the day they stopped coming, to the euphoria of lifting the Premier League trophy and the physical and emotional impact of injury, Micah reflects openly on the many wins and losses in professional football. Full of Micah’s signature cheeky wit, this intimate, unmissable memoir goes behind the scenes of the beautiful game and a remarkable life and career.

Succumb to your primal desires with The Little Book of Sex. From the first signs of attraction to the post-coital glow, explore the wonderful world of sex through raunchy quotes, tales of history's most insatiable lovers, and sensual tips to get you in the mood for lurve. With forays into foreplay, a romp through the Karma Sutra and even an explanation of the science behind the sizzle, you're in for titillating treat.

Perfect for couples who want to add a bit of spice to their love life or as a cheeky present for a friend soon to be hitched, The Little Book of Sex is the ideal book to get you feeling frisky (and probably provide a bit of a giggle at the same time!).

Challenge yourself at home with word and number puzzles 100 puzzles from The Times adapting the cryptic puzzle for those with a hectic lifestyle and schedule. Ideal for those starting out with cryptic crosswords, and those who'd like to tackle the main puzzle but feel daunted, or who can perhaps only solve a handful of clues. Appearing Monday to Friday in the puzzle pages of Times2, this crossword has a reduced 13x13 grid size and reduced difficulty too, the intention being to encourage people to take their first steps in tackling cryptic crosswords. And also to cater for those of us who have limited time to devote to our favourite pastime and need a ready-made set of puzzles that is solvable in a short space of time.

The ultimate life planner from Gemma Bray - bestselling author of The Organised Mum Method and The Organised Time Technique. The Organised Mum Method helped readers everywhere to feel on top of their housework. The Organised Time Technique revolutionised the way you planned the rest of your day. Now, The Organised Mum Method Journal will pull together both methods into an interactive, motivating journal that will help the you plan every aspect of your week. Divided into two clear sections 'Your House' and 'Your Time' the journal will remind you of all your TOMM housekeeping jobs for the coming week, with space for meal plans and weekly shopping lists, and will help you to create a TOTT schedule that will keep you on track with your timings leaving space for some time to yourself. There's also lots of other stuff to help you level up your life including an Organised Christmas planner, the Messy House Bootcamp and Clutter Buster and examples from Gemma's own journal (just in case you need a bit of inspiration). Whether you're a TOMM and TOTT devotee or just looking for a new way to get organised, The Organised Mum Method Journal will be your fun, motivating guide to sorting your life out - one day at a time.

This Mini Sticky Book is a portable hardcover containing a full-colour sticky notepad for easy note and list-taking at home or on the road. durable, pocket-sized, hardcover book cardstock and fabric inside pocket for business cards, cash, receipts, stamps, etc. 130 full-colour illustrated note sheets book measures 127 x 89mm. We choose the best images from well-known classic and contemporary fine artists, plus talented emerging illustrators and designers from around the globe. Vincent van Gogh (1853-1890) had an artistic career lasting only ten years. However, in those years he left behind an astounding legacy of painting that has endured to this day. He was a mad genius and he poured that passion into the trembling energy of his paintings. His canvases are celebrations of humanity & earth, colour & texture.

A funny, practical and crucial guide for women facing the life-changing prospect of returning to work after having children. Told by journalist, creative consultant and mother of two, Dolly Jones, The Ladder Down aims to be the definitive companion for parents navigating this complicated juggle (and for those thinking of doing so). When Dolly had her children, the idea of returning to work felt daunting. The thought of having to combine the challenges of career and family was unfamiliar yet, despite it being the experience of so many millions of women, she struggled to find material to help galvanise and reassure her; and to make her feel that anything was possible. In this book, Dolly aims to change all of that and provide women with practical advice, as well interweaving her own personal experiences. Told in an empowering and engaging way, The Ladder Down is a gift for the next generation of women taking on the trials, absurdities, challenges and general amusement involved in combining work and motherhood; one that will inspire and celebrate the women taking it on. Dolly will also combine anecdotal stories, life-hacks and guilt-avoidance strategies from a diverse range of women in a wide variety of industries – from fashion designers to taxi drivers, journalists to actors, lawyers to doctors, bankers, entrepreneurs and restaurateurs – to normalise the potential daily catastrophes in the life of a working mother. It will also feature serious advice from employers, employment lawyers and health specialists to boost knowledge and confidence; to act as a “ladder down� to the next generation of working women from a generation who have experimented their way to making it work.

Turn your Paperscapes book into a work of art and the perfect gift. Featuring 50 beautiful illustrations and innovative paper design, Paperscapes New York is both a book and a lovely decoration that you can proudly display. The press-out sections allow you to reveal the outlines of each building, creating the familiar cityscape of New York. Accompanying each illustration is an authoritative and compelling description that covers the key facts and history of New York's most striking architecture, allowing readers to explore the city in a way they never have before. Watch the videos on our Paperscapes author page to see your book transform into a dazzling skyline.

Brilliantly funny and full of mischief - if you love I NEED A NEW BUM! then you will love this book too! Baboon likes to show off his bottom. He's so cheeky! But what will happen when all the well-dressed animals in town tell him to cover up? A laugh-out-loud story that all children will enjoy, with an empowering message that grown-ups will appreciate too!

Robbie is born to be evil, or so he thinks - but how do you become the head of an evil dynasty when you're ... nice? 'A very funny fantasy quest with an amazingly evil queen.' RICHARD PICKARD, author of THE PECULIAR TALE OF TENTACLE BOY 'It's funny and clever with a strong message of friendship and family at its core. I loved it.' CLAIRE FAYRES, author of THE VOYAGE TO MAGICAL NORTH Robbie is heir to the evilest dynasty in the world: the Sinistevils. He can't wait to pledge his heart to the menacing power of the family Sceptre and embark on his bloodthirsty future. The thing is, Robbie is ... well ... hopelessly nice! Life in this royal family is about to get horribly complicated ... Tender, wise and often hilarious; the perfect read for fans of Despicable Me and Descendants, with a fairytale twist! Robbie is born to be evil, but he simply can't help his relentless optimism and belief in the goodness of others - his story is one of forging your own path and accepting your true self Longlisted for the Times/Chicken House Children's Fiction Competition

The story of the world's most formidable rugby team. The record of the All Blacks in world rugby is unmatched. From the famous pre match challenge of the haka to the scintillating brand of rugby they play, the team draws thousands around the world to stadiums and TVs to watch them play. Over the years, some of the greatest players to ever pick up a rugby ball have worn the iconic black jersey – names like Lomu, Meads, Carter and Barrett. From the first ever tours to the modern World Cups, the All Blacks embody a legacy of excellence that strikes fear into the heart of their opponents. 'Son, you've got to be prepared to piss blood to wear this jersey.' - All Black flanker Mark Shaw to debutant Mike Brewer, 1986. The 1924/5 All Black side won an astonishing 31 games in a row on their tour to the United Kingdom, France and North America. When they arrived back in New Zealand they were dubbed 'The Invincibles'.

The Little Book of Serenity is a handy pocketbook full of simple practices and gentle pauses to help you bring greater calm to your everyday routine; part antidote to pandemonium and part guide to peaceful living amid the mayhem of modern life. Packed with practical tips and nourishing inspiration, Cheryl Rickman encourages readers to soften the edges of our busy lives by cultivating serene spaces and practices. Drawing on her knowledge as a wellness expert and positive psychology practitioner, exercises include everything from nature walks and meditation to creative play and journaling.

When Frenchmen Charles Blondin became the first daredevil to tightrope walk across Niagara Falls in June 1859, he opened the doors of imagination for all sorts of human ingenuity (and stupidity) for which the Falls became famous for more than a century. Since that day, Niagara Falls has become ingrained in the fabric of America's soul, an icon of its all-natural beauty and, for a long time, its most famous spiritual and tourist hotspot, cherished for weddings, boat rides and 8 million visitors mesmerized by the mighty crash of nature's tonic. The Little Book of Niagara Falls is full of all the waterfall-fun you can think of – stats, jokes, quotes, notes, stories, icons, and origins – a tiny tome for your home, maybe even a bedside companion, to inspire your next quest to America's northeast. Who knows? You may even take a barrel with you – and go for ride over the side! 'My blood shudders still, although I am no coward, at the grandeur of the Creator's power; and I gazed motionless on this new display of the irresistible force of one of His elements.' John James Audubon The name Niagara originates from the indigenous peoples, the Iroquoian, nearby settlement called Onguiaahra – pronounced 'Niagara' – meaning 'point of land cut in two'.

**A SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER** Reclaim your time, your kitchen, and your taste buds with over 80 delicious recipes to feed your soul! Whether you have 15 minutes or an hour to spare, this gorgeous debut cookbook from Lucy Lord will reignite your love for cooking, help you get creative in the kitchen, and redefine your relationship with food. Be it a two-minute-smoothie in the morning to get you going before work, or a thick slice of banana bread on a lazy weekend catch-up with friends, these recipes are simple but special. Dig into this beautiful book and discover that happiness really is homemade. With chapters including: • It’s a Good Day to Have a Good Day: Breakfasts and Brunches • Dips and Dressings: Your new staples • Say No to Shit Salads • Mains: Winning combinations for any appetite • In-Betweens and Afters • Get Baked: Sweet and Savoury recipes to rival any artisan • Smoothies and Cocktails

You are feeling sleepy... If you're tired of sleepless nights, and wish you could drop off in two shakes of a lamb's tail, then say hello to Kip! Your woolly friend will guide you through this soporific little volume that's filled with more sheep than you can count and plenty of relaxing puzzles. It'll have you snoozing in no time.

To run away to Brazil, turn to 34. To get a tattoo, turn to 147. To burn your house down, turn to 145. Midway through our lives, we wonder how we ended up here and whether there's a way out. There must have been a crucial turning point, but there's no way to start again in the hope of a better result. Or is there? Here's your chance to try all the roads not taken: polyamory, ayahuasca, younger men, enlightenment, infidelity, Botox, or just telling your boss for once and for all where she can shove her job. But beware: all choices come at a cost... Yelpingly funny, horribly relatable, here are the predicaments of modern midlife, brought together in a compulsively readable book-as-game which - just like real life - you can never truly win.

The perfect romantic gift. When it comes to finding perfect love, lobsters are the best. They don't care about gifts, unless they're homemade, or about grand gestures...lovely little ones will do! With your lobster, it's about the real stuff...lying on your back to watch clouds, tickling each other until you need to pee, or devouring a box set all in one go. Ways you will know you have found your lobster and not just fished out another crab: they will chuckle at the same jokes, let you share their fries and will buckle up to accompany you on this crazy ride called life.

A mile deep. 277-miles long. 18 miles wide. The Grand Canyon isn't just spectacular in terms of its size, scale and iconic stature – though it is MASSIVE – its also huge in terms of its popularity, remaining in the U.S.'s Top Five all-natural tourist hotspots. Located in Arizona, the Canyon was carved by the Colorado River 70 million years ago. Today, it's the whole world's most famous hole, where the view up is as impressive, and frightening, as the view looking down. The Little Book of the Grand Canyon condenses the beauty of this behemoth into the palm of your hand, squeezing it down to its essential facts, stats, quotes, notes, icons and origins, a compact compendium of canyon-based grandiosity. Put simply, it's everything you need to know before you go. 'The wonders of the Grand Canyon cannot be adequately represented in symbols of speech, nor by speech itself.' John Wesley Powell 'You can't say you're going to jump the Grand Canyon and then jump some other canyon.' Evel Knievel

The best dads are like the best coaches: they motivate, support, mentor, encourage, and guide. In this perfect-for-gifting book, parenting expert and author of Dad's Playbook (almost 100,000 copies sold) Tom Limbert gathers inspiration from some of the biggest names in sports about the lessons they learned from their dads in order to triumph and thrive. Reflections from the likes of Stephen Curry, Natalie Coughlin, Tom Brady, and others are gathered into chapters about values that are powerful on and off the field, such as discipline, enthusiasm, and commitment. Packaged as a handsome hardcover, this motivating and entertaining book is the perfect way to show any father or father-to-be that they are the world's Most Valuable Dad.

A beautiful, original and compelling invitation into the drama, wonder and mystery of the Christmas story. The warm rhythms and fresh directness of Mark Greene's poems are graced not only by illuminating design and gorgeous illustrations but by reflections that poignantly and powerfully connect the ancient world with our own. Intriguing and uplifting, Adventure makes an exquisite gift for Christmas, an enriching companion for Advent and a source of inspiration in any season.

"We'll always have Paris," croons Humphrey Bogart in "Casablanca "to a young Ingrid Bergman. F. Scott Fitzgerald commented that "the best of America drifts to Paris." But, should one never get the opportunity to visit Paris, one might take consolation in the words of critic William Hazlitt, who called it a "beast of a city." Be it praise or colorful invective, everyone, it seems, has something to say about the city and this slender volume--filled with wise, witty, and sometimes scandalous quotes--presents the full range of impressions it has made.
"Paris in Quotations" takes readers on a one-of-a-kind tour of the City of Lights, in which we hear from the likes of Moliere and Thomas Gold Appleton, who thought that, "When good Americans die, they go to Paris." For centuries, Paris has reigned over the popular imagination. For those planning a visit, this collection will be warmly welcomed.

Many of us are already doing what we can to adopt a greener lifestyle. We recycle, try to reduce our waste and plastics, choose organic food when shopping, eat less meat and opt for environmentally friendly cleaning products. Yet we often wish we were doing more and it can be overwhelming to know where to start.

Live Green is a practical guide of 52 changes - one for each week of the year - you can make to your home and lifestyle to reduce your impact on the environment. Tackling all areas of your life from your cleaning routine, home furnishings, food shopping, fashion choices, natural beauty and Christmas, this book has all the ingredients to help you achieve a more sustainable year.

From making your own eco-friendly cleaning products, buying vintage furniture, making your own moth repellent and improving your natural beauty regime to creating a capsule wardrobe and creating your own ethical Christmas decorations - discover how to get the most out of life by living with intention.

Live simply. Live Green.

A beautifully presented, practical gift guide to the age-old art of whittling. There are 50 projects featured in the book, ranging from quick makes to more elaborate projects, and even a chapter on creating things from cork. The 8 main themes are: Quick Things - including a doorstop, a bookmark and a gift-box book; Into The Woods - including a willow whistle, walking stick, fish hook and slingshot; Around The House - including chopsticks, coat and crochet hooks; Cork Creations - including a succulent pot, stamp, and earphones spool; Ornamental Carving - including a boat, a deer and a spinning top; Kitchen Carving - including a carrot flute, apple candle and onion flower; The Natural World - including a bird feeder and instructions to prepare a fish for cooking, a graft an apple tree. The projects cater for a range of skill levels and the instructions are complemented by smart step-by-step illustrations, which highlight the tactile quality of the material in hand. The book also includes an introduction with advice on selecting a penknife, maintaining your blade, choosing your caving material, and carving techniques. Featuring the ultimate crossover of cool craftsmanship and savvy survival-skill projects, this book is the perfect gift for creative adventurers.

From the private papers of Mark Twain and Mozart to those of Robert Browning and Nelson, Love Letters of Great Men collects together some of the most romantic letters in history.

For some of these great men, love is a 'delicious poison' (William Congreve); for others, 'a nice soft wife on a sofa with good fire, & books & music' (Charles Darwin). Love can scorch like the heat of the sun (Henry VIII), or penetrate the depths of one's heart like a cooling rain (Flaubert). Every shade of love is here, from the exquisite eloquence of Oscar Wilde and the simple devotion of Robert Browning, to the wonderfully modern misery of the Roman Pliny the Younger, losing himself in work to forget how much he misses his beloved wife, Calpurnia.

Taken together, these Love Letters of Great Men show that perhaps men haven't changed so very much over the last 2,000 years; passion, jealousy, hope and longing are all represented here - as is the simple pleasure of sending a letter to, and receiving one from, the person you love most.