"While debating Sir Winston on the House of Commons, Lady Astor says, "Sir Winston, if I were your wife, I should poison your tea."Sir Winston replies, "Madam, if I were your husband, I would drink it.""

In 1066, a Battle of Hastings ensued in England, eventually causing two languages to merge and form modern English. In "The Joke's on Me, " English language aficionado Jim Purdy provides an entertaining tutorial of jokes, explanations, and associated vocabulary based on this historical transition.

Purdy bases most of his jokes on sex, politics, and religion, depending on the unexpected as he leads serious students of languages to the "other side" of English. While including jokes not intended for the easily offended, Purdy relies on the experiences he acquired during his frequent travels throughout Europe as he shares jokes as diverse as the world around us. Purdy spares no one from his humorous jabs, including Lady Astor and Sir Winston, the Lone Ranger, and the Pope.

"The Joke's on Me" is a step-by-step guide that will encourage both novice and experienced students of languages to gain a new appreciation of the American sense of humor while simultaneously enhancing their vocabulary and linguistics abilities.

My mate was selling a television cheap because the volume was broken. I couldn't turn it down. What's black and white and bad all over? These jokes! Groaning with silly gags, classic crap wisecracks, naff knock-knocks, poor puns and lame one-liners, this book will make you cry until you laugh.

Laugh this up for free...Knock, knock! Who's there? Gorilla. Gorilla who? Gorilla me a steak Knock, knock! * Who's there? Bee! Bee who? Don't worry! I'll Bee there for you! * Knock, knock! Who's there? Pig. Pig who? Pig on someone your own size. * Knock, knock! Who's there? Iowa! Iowa who? Iowa big apology to you! I think I just hit your car! * Knock, knock! Who's there? Juneau Juneau who? Juneau who that girl is? * Knock, knock! Who's there? Kentucky Kentucky who? Kentucky my eyes off you! * Knock, knock! Who's there? Abby Abby who? A bee just stung me! * Knock, knock! Who's there? Bridge! Bridge who? London Bridge is falling down, falling down...

The perfect holiday stocking stuffer or gag gift for anyone on your list! May your days be punny and bright! When it comes to bad jokes, there's snowman like dad. Brace your elves for a winter punderland of the best dad jokes to make anyone sigh, groan, or roll their eyes! Filled with over 300 of the raddest and the daddest puns, quips, and cheesy one-liners, Dad Jokes Holiday Edition is the perfect way to sleigh this holiday season! Give the ultimate, laugh-out-loud dad jokes book that will make a wonderful funny gift for dads, husbands, boyfriends, grandpas, stepdads, or any pun lover! Inside you'll find the merriest jokes on winter festivities, Hanukkah, Christmas, and New Year's, including knee-slappers like: Q: Why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee? A: Because they're Santa's star bucks! There are always winners and lugers in the Winter Olympics. I love Christmas, but New Year's Eve is stressful for me. My doctor said I had something called "Auld Lanxiety." "Dad, I'm hungry. Will the latkes be long?" "No, they'll be round."

Hundreds and Hundreds of Jokes that Will Drive Your Family Crazy Nothing is more hilarious for moms, sons, and daughters than the bad jokes dads tell. (Well, at least he thinks they're hilarious . . .) Have you ever noticed when you're out to dinner and your dad takes it upon himself to antagonize your server with a lame joke? Has he ever made a pun that made everyone at a family gathering roll their eyes? Has he ever made a corny comment about things simply lying around the house? If you answered "yes" to any of the following, you're not alone. Dad jokes are at the center of all dad interactions and the core of every dad's persona. This comedic compendium compiles more than eight hundred of the best jokes dads can use to hone their craft and ensure maximum eye rolling. Included within are jokes such as: Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food; no atmosphere. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's fine, he woke up. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room? Odor in the court. What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant. What kind of tea is hard to swallow? Reality. With Dad Jokes, give your dad the gift of becoming the least funny/most "punny" guy in the room.

If you're into aviation, this book is a must. Learn about the distinctions between helicopter and airplane pilots in a joking way. This book is a great way to break the ice, especially at a party.

Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe! What are dad jokes? Short, simple one-liners that are fairly clean. Anyone can tell dad jokes, but they are best told by dads. Now The World's Greatest Dad Jokes: The Complete Collection is here and inside you'll find: - More puns, quips, and corny one-liners than ever that are sure to get eyes rolling - Hundreds of dad jokes that will make you groan--then make you smile. This book is jam-packed with clever quips and unbearable wisecracks that are so bad, they're good. Now the dad joke aficionado in your life will never run out of puns, no matter how much you might want them to. The perfect gift for the dad who thinks he's heard them all, this book is sure to add even more jokes to his repertoire, for better or worse. These jokes are so funny you won't even see them coming!

"An excellent example of applied folklore."
-- "Western Folklore"

"A book with a wonderful interdisciplinary idea-using sexual urban legends as part of high school and college sex education"
"--The Women's Review of Books, Oct. 2001"

"Provocatively bridges the interdisciplinary gap between folklore and sexuality education."
--"Journal of Folklore Research"

"One might assume that a book on urban legends would be too pop-culturish to be of value to serious sexuality educators and students, but one would be wrong...Whatley and Henken hae written a book that is as intelligent as it is interesting and funny."
--"The Journal of Sex Research"

Ever hear the one about the man who wakes up after a chance sexual encounter to discover he's been involuntarily relieved of one of his kidneys? Or the tiny gift-wrapped box from a recently departed lover that reveals a horrible secret? Everyone knows contemporary legends, those barely believable, often lurid, cautionary tales, always told as though they happened to the friend of a friend. Sometimes we pass them on to others unsure of their truthfulness, usually we dismiss them as mere myth. But these far-fetched legends tell us quite a bit about our deepest fears and fantasies.

In fact, a large part of what we know about our bodies we have learned informally, from kids on the playground or colleagues at work, from piecing together the information contained in folk beliefs, jokes and legends. Sexual folklore goes beyond classroom lessons of mechanics to answer many questions about what people actually do and how they do it.

Mariamne H. Whatley and Elissa R. Henken have collected hundreds of sexually-themed stories andjokes from college students in order to tell us what they reveal about our sexual attitudes and show us how they have changed over time. They confront myths and stereotypes about sexual behavior and use folklore as a tool to educate students about sexual health and gender relations. Whether analyzing popular rumors about celebrity emergency room visits or the latest schoolyard jokes, Did You Hear About The Girl Who . . . ? presents these tales in a way that is intriguing and educational.

Why did the banana go to the doctors? Because he wasn't peeling very well! Proving the age-old maxim that 'it's in the way that you tell them', Dads - for the best part of forever - have always been renowned for being truly god-awful joke tellers. Whether it's telling them at the wrong moment, misremembering the punchline or it just simply being one of those jokes that were terrible to begin with, Dads are an embarrassment to the whole family when it comes to trying to tell jokes. The VERY Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes is full to the brim with jokes that only your dear old Dad would dare say - jokes that will make you groan, sigh ... and then probably make you groan again. Dads take great pleasure in these kinds of jokes and some of them are so rubbish they actually blossom into proper rib-ticklers - but don't tell your dad that, it'll only encourage him!