Why did the banana go to the doctors? Because he wasn't peeling very well! Proving the age-old maxim that 'it's in the way that you tell them', Dads - for the best part of forever - have always been renowned for being truly god-awful joke tellers. Whether it's telling them at the wrong moment, misremembering the punchline or it just simply being one of those jokes that were terrible to begin with, Dads are an embarrassment to the whole family when it comes to trying to tell jokes. The VERY Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes is full to the brim with jokes that only your dear old Dad would dare say - jokes that will make you groan, sigh ... and then probably make you groan again. Dads take great pleasure in these kinds of jokes and some of them are so rubbish they actually blossom into proper rib-ticklers - but don't tell your dad that, it'll only encourage him!

Get ready for your next family reunion with jokes that give a good-natured ribbing to people of every generation. You'll be ready to face the horde at your next family get-together with this collection of age (in)appropriate jokes aimed at people of every generation. Whether you need a zinger for your cranky grandfather, a one-liner for your out-of-touch aunt, or a snarky comeback for a clueless millennial, OK, Boomer has what you need. This collection of all-new material includes jokes such as... How many boomers does it take to change a light bulb? Three: one to do it, and another two to talk about how much better the old one was. Q: Why do boomers always pay with an exact amount? A: Because they're afraid of change. Boomer Band/Millennial Mash-ups: James Taylor Swift, Fleetwood Macklemore, Steve Miller Band of Horses.

Emojis have captured our hearts, just as we have acquired theirs at the end of many of our texts and emails. These little colourful characters and icons of the small screen have - like it or not - become part of the very fabric of our modern society. We have embraced them in our schools, homes and places of work. They have become integral to the way we communicate, live and behave these days. We use them as accessories to enhance our style, and they reflect our moods and personality. Emoji Puzzles helps you learn all you need to know about the world's fastest growing language, and people's growing reliance on speed for injecting emotion and mood into a short email or text message. With tips and trivia, facts, puzzles, games and entertaining Emoji-related "emoji-neering" for your smartphone, Emoji Puzzles is the perfect gift for any Emoji-mad member in your family which, last time we looked, was everyone.

It's time to get down and even dirtier with this second selection of the filthiest gags you're ever likely to hear. "100 Dirty Jokes for Girls" is all you need to give you a naughty thrill and is jam-packed with outrageous stories, punchlines and one-liners that are guaranteed to have you and your mates laughing out loud. And, because all women know that men and sex make a hilarious double act, the book includes jokes on chat-ups, dirty talk, foreplay, penis size, orgasms and between-the-sheets mishaps, making it a side-splitting read and proving that - in this case at least - size doesn't matter. So, move over Christina Aguilera - you're not the only dirty girl in town!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To pick up her own copy of An Arkful of Animal Jokes—for Kids!

This hilarious collection of jokes, funny stories, riddles, and one-liners is sure to make anyone laugh. . .even you sourpusses!

Perfect for 8–12-year-olds, An Arkful of Animal Jokes—for Kids! features chapters on more than 30 kinds of animals, from

• alligators to chickens
• dogs to frogs
• monkeys to skunkies
• snails to zebras

There are nearly 500 jokes in all, including a section on the keeper of the world’s first floating zoo, Noah himself! If you’re looking for clean, good-humored, often laugh-out-loud entertainment, this is the book for you. Don’t miss the boat—An Arkful of Animal Jokes—for Kids! awaits.

Get ready to laugh yourself silly in this hilarious new joke book all about . . .

. . . MERMAIDS!

Dive right in and Join Silly Sally, the funniest mermaid in the whole ocean, as she tells you some very silly jokes.

What does a mermaid say to the clam at the disco?

Shell we dance?

How does a mermaid make friends with a dolphin?

On porpoise!

Why was the mermaid embarrassed?

She saw the ship's bottom!

Full of jokes, puns and one-liners about mermaids and their underwater friends this hilarious book is full of mermazing jokes to share with all of your friends too! Splash right in and trident not to split your sides laughing!

With a sparkly foiled cover for an extra special magical touch and over 150 jokes to share, this is the perfect gift for children aged 8+ and is guaranteed to have the whole family laughing.

How fluent are you in emoji? Test out your skills in Emoji Puzzles, full of tips and trivia, facts, puzzles and games to satisfy any emoji expert. Can you recognise the film Forrest Gump when it is written in emoji? How about the lyrics to Adele's Hello? Covering categories such as film, music, celebrities, superheroes, video games, famous events and many more. Emoji Puzzles is the perfect gift for any Emoji-mad member in your family, which, last time we looked, was everyone!

This hilarious collection offers up some of the funniest moments that get us through our day, in the form of jokes, gags and cartoons that will have readers laughing out loud.
Editors have mined the "Reader's Digest" archives to bring readers "Laughter the Best Medicine, All-Time Faves," a collection of the most hilarious jokes and anecdotes we've come across over the years. As you turn the pages of our newest collection, you'll realize once again
that laughter is always the best medicine.
"Did you hear the one about the hitchhiker who never got anywhere? He'd get up early to avoid traffic." --Chuck Welch, Houston, TX
"When my husband was a home builder, his thumb ended up on the business end of a sledgehammer, and our three-year-old daughter, Kiana, was eager to tell the entire world. When her caregiver asked how the accident had happened, Kiana shook her head sadly and said, "You know, sometimes at work, my daddy just gets hammered."
--Stasia Uhlmann, Rocky Mountain House, Canada
"After one of my students acted up, I took him to our school psychiatrist, who asked if he had ADHD. "No," said the boy. "I just have a normal TV." -Matthew Hughes, Fort Collins, CO
"I've been told that when you meet the right person, you know immediately. How come when you meet the wrong person, it takes a year and a half?" --Comedian Phil Hanley

What happened to the man with five legs? His trousers fit him like a glove. You can't keep a good Dad joke down. At the Sunday lunch table, down the pub, at the workplace, dads all over the nation are still churning out the lamest, most pathetic jokes you've ever heard. And we've gathered them all in this book. Back by popular demand, The Very Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes 2 is an all-new collection of Dad joke favourites. With 1000 rib-tickling jokes for every occasion, this book makes it easier than ever to have a laugh - or, more likely, a groan - with Dad. Who drives round the West Country in a camper van? Tess of the Dormobiles. What do angry mice send one another in winter? Cross-mouse cards. Word count: 30,000

Some people think the workplace is no place for funny business. But a recent survey of more than 700 CEOs showed that 98% prefer job candidates with a sense of humour, and 84% think that funny employees do better work. Psychologist Dr Jennifer Aaker and comedian Naomi Bagdonas' research has shown that humour makes us feel more competent and confident, strengthens relationships and boosts resilience during difficult times. Based on their popular course "Humour: Serious Business" at Stanford's Graduate School of Business, (where they help some of the world's most hard-driving, blazer-wearing business minds build levity into their organizations and lives), Humour, Seriously will show you how to use humour to: * enhance creativity and problem-solving * influence and motivate others * increase likability and status * build bonds and defuse tension within teams * create a culture where colleagues feel safe, appreciated and joyful If you think being funny is unprofessional, think again. Humour is the most under-leveraged tool for power in the working world. No joke!

"Highly recommended. I think it will make children wriggle with delight" - Stephen Fry If I ever find myself holding a gecko . . . I'll lecko. Forget what you think you know about poetry - this is something totally different. Chris Harris' I'm Just No Good At Rhyming combines wit, wordplay and nonsense with visual and verbal tricks to make you look at the world in a new and wonderfully upside-down way, reminiscent of Spike Milligan. I'm just no good at rhyming. It makes me feel so bad. I'm just no good at rhyming, And that's why I'm so blue. This entirely unique collection of wildly witty words offers a surprise around every corner, from the ongoing rivalry between the author and illustrator (mean poem and cruel portrait included), to the mysteriously misnumbered pages that can only be deciphered by a certain code-cracking verse, to a poem that is 100% genuinely infinite. Meet a balding werewolf, competitive boulders, a birthday piranha, and find out if grown-ups really are better! Why are grown-ups better than kids? 'Cause we got what it takes - We never, ever, ever, ever, ever, make mistaeks! Adding to the fun: Lane Smith, winner of the CILIP Kate Greenaway Medal for There Is a Tribe of Kids, has spectacularly illustrated this extraordinary collection with nearly one hundred pieces of appropriately absurd art. It's a mischievous match made in heaven and the perfect gift for creative kids or immature grown-ups.

This sparkling collection of golden age wit and wisdom is proof-positive that the stereotypes of knitting grannies and doddering granddads just aren't true anymore - if, indeed, they ever were. Senior citizens are not going gentle into that good night. They're still out there, living life to the full, taking selfies, 'silver surfing' the net and showing the rest of us how to grow up and grow old disgracefully. Because as Maurice Chevalier said, 'Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative.' This is a joke book specifically designed for oldies, so look out you young whippersnappers - you probably won't get half of them!

"I'll never forget the words my granddad said before he kicked the bucket. He said 'Grandson, watch how far I can kick this bucket.'"
"The key to any marriage is spontaneity. You've got to be ready to leave at any time."
Bringing together some of the funniest, wittiest, and most cutting jokes the world over, Grant Tucker's volume is the definitive collection of the quips comedians call "one-liners." Short, sweet, and undeniably clever, one-liners hold a special place in the history of comedy, and the rise of Twitter and social media seems to have ushered in a new era of this comedic art form. With most people expressing themselves in 140 characters or less, there seems no better time to celebrate Grant's collection and the immortal one-liner.
Side-splittingly funny, " 5,000 Sidesplitting Jokes and One-Liners" has all the puns, zingers, and witty remarks you could ever ask for--and many you'd never dream of asking for.
"My granddad has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.""A dyslexic man walks into a bra.""Corduroy pillows: they're making headlines ""Promises are a bit like babies: fun to make but hard to deliver.""Schizophrenia--together I can beat it.""Drugs are never the answer. Unless the clue is: 'Narcotics, five letters.'"

An enormous collection of over 3,000 side-splitting jokes for every occasion. Jokes range from quick-fire one-liners and observations to rambling yarns, and from the classic to the modern. This book contains quips for every occasion, from the best man's speech to the sales conference, or just for swapping around the pub table, and it's arranged by subject matter so it's easy to find just the right joke. Unless you're a child, because this book is definitely for adults only! This hilarious book will appeal both to people who want to find a specific joke for a specific event, and to anyone who wants to settle down in an armchair and have a good old laugh. Jokes include: * What do you call a magic dog? A Labracadabrador. * What's the best thing about Switzerland? I don't know, but their flag is a huge plus. * What did the slug say to the snail? 'Big Issue?' Word count: 200,000 words

More than 600 jokes, gags and laugh lines, Drawn from one of the most popular features of Reader's Digest magazine, this collection of jokes, one-liners, and other lighthearted glimpses of life is just what the doctor ordered.

Wrinklies Worldly Wit & Wisdom is a compilation of over 1500 amusing and insightful quotations from well-known writers, politicians, film stars, artists, musicians and philosophers. Every topic of discussion is covered - from love and marriage, sex and Viagra, to dressing inappropriately, entering retirement, families and the march of technology. Whether you're just getting your grey hairs or you're a venerable member of the golden generation, Wrinklies Worldly Wit & Wisdom is the perfect source of insight and advice.

My mate was selling a television cheap because the volume was broken. I couldn't turn it down. What's black and white and bad all over? These jokes! Groaning with silly gags, classic crap wisecracks, naff knock-knocks, poor puns and lame one-liners, this book will make you cry until you laugh.

Who says math can't be funny? In Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks, Patrick Vennebush dispels the myth of the humorless mathematician. His quick wit comes through in this incredible compilation of jokes and stories. Intended for all math types, Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks provides a comprehensive collection of math humor, containing over 400 jokes. It's a book that all teachers from elementary school through college should have in their library. But the humor isn't just for the classroom-it also appeals to engineers, statisticians, and other math professionals searching for some good, clean, numerical fun. From basic facts (Why is 6 afraid of 7?) to trigonometry (Mathematical puns are the first sine of dementia) and algebra (Graphing rational functions is a pain in the asymptote), no topic is safe. As Professor Jim Rubillo notes, Math Jokes 4 Math Folks is an absolute gem for anyone dedicated to seeing mathematical ideas through puns, double meanings, and blatant bad jokes. Such perspectives help to see concepts and ideas in different and creative ways.

The best dad joke book you'll ever read. Yes, it's that bad. As the ancient adage goes, 'A good dad joke is as bad as a bad dad joke'. On that fuzzy logic alone, 100 per cent of the 180+ dad jokes in this book are pure comedy gold. The jokes included in this tiny tome are revered by dads all over the world - that's how bad they are. Some jokes are old, some are new, some are unrepeatable - but all of them are worn out and tired. If you're a dad, you'll love them. If you're buying it for your dad, don't worry, the book is little for a purpose: should the urge to throw it down the toilet arise, it'll fit in one flush. Like dads themselves, these dad jokes are absolute stinkers. They haven't showered or gone to the gym in a while and, due to bloating, haven't seen their funny bones in a long time. But, like dads themselves, you'd miss them if you didn't hear them every once in a while. They are loveable in their own charming way. But, remember, don't eat all these jokes at once - you'll have a severe nervous breakdown. You have been warned!

THE NEW BOOK IN THE BESTSELLING SERIES The most followed dad jokes page on Instagram, @DadSaysJokes, returns with another collection of hilariously cringe-inducing gags for you to share with friends and family. @DadSaysJokes is a community-run Dad jokes network on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter, with over 3 million followers, inspired by the daily jokes of author Kit Chilvers' dad, Andrew. Every day, followers submit their jokes and the team picks their favourites - or Dad just drops in his own zinger! Kit, a young social networking influencer, started his career at the tender age of 14 when he created his original platform, Football.Newz. He has since added another nine platforms, including @PubityPets and monster meme page @Pubity with its 25 million followers. This is his third book. I TOLD MY WIFE SHE SHOULD EMBRACE HER MISTAKES. SHE GAVE ME A HUG.