'There is no doubt a greater awareness now of the significance of twin loss than there was ten years ago. I think that this is largely due to a big increase in articles, radio and television programmes as well as the spread of the Network. The well-known researcher Nancy Segal in the USA has, through her many books, added knowledge to our understanding of twin relationships as well as twin loss. She believes the loss to be highly significant and queries whether for some lone twins it is greater even than that of the loss of a spouse (Segal 2000). Others have written autobiographical material about their loss (Jones 1987; Farmer 1988). In spite of this, there is still ignorance. At a recent book launch for the publication of a book about the loss of a twin through drug taking (Burton-Phillips 2007) someone in the field of education said to a few of us from the Network, that she did not see how a twin who lost their twin at birth could possibly be affected. She asked, 'How would the surviving twin know?' I asked her to imagine how she might feel if told during her childhood that she had been born a twin, but due to her taking all the food' during the pregnancy, her twin had not survived. I suggested that perhaps worse, she might have had her parents make it clear that they wished her twin had been the one to live. Less dramatically, she was asked how she might feel missing someone all her life who 'should have been there' to share it. This question was put by a lone twin who added that she had also had surviving twins born to the family to watch growing up as a pair, while she was without her twin sister. The educationist was honest and said she had never thought of those things before and then freely admitted our comments made her think again' - Joan Woodward, Author.

For those who have suffered the loss of a loved one, here are strength and thoughtful words to inspire and comfort.

In 2009, New York Times bestselling author Sara Davidson was surprised by a call from Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi, asking her to engage with him in what he called "The December Project." At eighty-five, Reb Zalman wanted to teach people how to navigate the December of life and to help them "not freak out about dying."

Davidson jumped at the chance. She feared that death would be a complete annihilation, while Reb Zalman felt certain that "something continues." For two years, they met every Friday to discuss this and how getting "up close with mortality" quickens our ability to relish every day.

Woven through their talks are sketches from Reb Zalman's life: escaping the Nazis; becoming an orthodox rabbi in the U.S.; landing in San Francisco during the sexual revolution; taking L.S.D. with Timothy Leary; befriending other faith leaders, including Thomas Merton and the Dalai Lama; and founding the Jewish Renewal movement.

During their time together, Davidson was nearly killed by a suicide bomb and Reb Zalman faced a steep decline in health. They created strategies to deal with pain and memory loss and found tools to cultivate fearlessness and joy--at any age. Davidson includes twelve exercises so readers can experience what she did, a sea change in facing what we all must face: mortality.

Many books on grief lay out a model to be followed, either for bereaved persons to live through or for professionals to practice, and usually follow some familiar prescriptions for what people should do to reach an accommodation with loss. The Crafting of Grief is different: it focuses on conversations that help people chart their own path through grief. Authors Hedtke and Winslade argue convincingly that therapists and counselors can support people more by helping them craft their own responses to bereavement rather than trying to squeeze experiences into a model. In the pages of this book, readers will learn how to develop lines of inquiry based on the concept of continuing bonds, and they'll discover ways to use these ideas to help the bereaved craft stories that remember loved ones' lives.

This uplifting journal is offered as a timeless gift for the bereaved, with the intention to celebrate the life of their loved one and bring degrees of comfort when grief is beyond words.The journal will gradually evolve over time and become a treasured keepsake for many years to come. By gathering precious memories from family and friends, each empty page will ultimately be filled with unique anecdotes, stories, poetry or illustrations, which will help paint a beautiful picture of the life being celebrated. Scattered throughout the journal are a selection of inspirational quotes, poems, stories and prayers, plus some suggestions for coping and a list of recommended organisations to support the bereaved throughout the grieving process.

List of Tables. List of Figures. Series Editor's Foreword. Preface. Prologue. Acknowledgements. What It Means to Be a Parent After a Child Had Died. The "Mothers Now Childless" Study: Research Design and Findings. When a Child Dies, Does Grieving Ever End? One Death - A Thousand Strands of Pain: Finding the Meaning of Suffering. Bereaved Parents' Search for Understanding: The Paradox of Healing. Confronting a Spiritual Crisis: Where is God When Bad Things Happen? Confronting an Existential Crisis: Can Life Have Purpose Again? Deciding to Survive: Reaching Bottom - Climbing Up. Remembering With Love: Bereaved Parents as Biographer. Reaching Out to Help Others: Wounded Healers. Reinventing the Self: Parents Ask, "Who Are We Now?". The Legacy of Loss. References. Resources. Appendices. Index.

This classic resource helps guide the bereaved person through the loss of a loved one, and provides an opportunity to learn to live with and work through the personal grief process.

The second edition of this bestselling book is designed for mental health professionals, educators, and the parent/caregiver, this book provides specific ideas and techniques to work with children in various areas of complicated grief. It presents words and methods to help initiate discussions of these delicate topics, as well as tools to help children understand and separate complicated grief into parts. These parts in turn can be grieved for and released one at a time. A new chapter is included, called "Communities Grieve: Involvement with Children and Trauma." It includes information on The Taiwan Earthquake and how the community worked with children, a school bus accident in which 36 elementary school children witnessed the death of the bus driver that was driving and how the school system worked with these children and their families; a boy who was running on a cross country team and got hit by a car, which was witnessed by teammates; and how a non-profit community grief agency worked with family, school, and community. The last study is from the Oklahoma bombing and the outgrowth of a place for the traumatized children and how they still work with kids and family today. This chapter then contains new activities to work with traumatized grieving children. The new edition also includes updated resources, books, curriculums, websites, hotlines and another new chapter on bullying and victimization issues. The chapter for educators has been expanded, including the coverage of topics such as at-risk students, gay and lesbian issues, and self-injurious behaviors.

'Wonderful, thoughtful, practical' - Cariad Lloyd, Griefcast 'Encouraging and inspiring' - Dr Kathryn Mannix, author of Amazon bestseller With the End in Mind End-of-life doula Anna Lyons and funeral director Louise Winter have joined forces to share a collection of the heartbreaking, surprising and uplifting stories of the ordinary and extraordinary lives they encounter every single day. From working with the living, the dying, the dead and the grieving, Anna and Louise reveal the lessons they've learned about life, death, love and loss. Together they've created a profound but practical guide to rethinking the one thing that's guaranteed to happen to us all. We are all going to die, and that's ok. Let's talk about it. This is a book about life and living, as much as it's a book about death and dying. It's a reflection on the beauties, blessings and tragedies of life, the exquisite agony and ecstasy of being alive, and the fragility of everything we hold dear. It's as simple and as complicated as that.

On Children and Death is a major addition to the classic works of Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, whose On Death and Dying and Living with Death and Dying have been continuing sources of strength and solace for tens of millions of devoted readers worldwide. Based on a decade of working with dying children, this compassionate book offers the families of dead and dying children the help -- and hope -- they need to survive. In warm, simple language, Dr. Kübler-Ross speaks directly to the fears, doubts, anger, confusion, and anguish of parents confronting the terminal illness or sudden death of a child.

The story of heartbreak to triumph in the wake of a tragedy. Their first date in college was a U2 concert and after that Lauren and Jack Grandcolas were inseparable. He was mesmerized by her sweetness, fierce intelligence and eyes that were as blue and alive as the ocean. They married and settled in San Francisco, each pursuing their dreams in the business world. After a decade of trying, Lauren finally got pregnant at the age of thirty-eight. On September 6, 2001, she flew to New Jersey-her beloved Little Grandma had died and following the funeral Lauren shared the joyous news of her pregnancy to lift her family's spirits. Flying home to Jack on September 11th, she arrived at Newark airport early and walked on to a flight for which she hadn't been ticketed: United 93. During that terrifying flight, Lauren left a calm and reassuring voice mail for Jack which remains a testament to her courage and selfless love, even in the face of her own mortality. Like a River to the Sea is a story of love overcoming loss. In this moving memoir, Jack Grandcolas brings to life his college sweetheart while taking the reader through his long journey to make peace with the loss of Lauren and their unborn child. Jack is honest about the depth of his despair and his battles with depression, PTSI, and heavy drinking. As he digs himself out of the deepest hole imaginable, Jack learns universal truths that will help anyone confronted with tragedy. Like a River to the Sea is also a deeply personal look at an event of historical importance. Jack takes us inside the White House to meet with President Bush and to the precipice of a still-smoldering hole in the earth outside of Shanksville, Penn. The book goes aboard United 93 in its final minutes, when this brave collection of Americans fought to retake control of the plane, ultimately preventing the hijackers from completing their mission and becoming the first heroes in the war against terror. As with Jack's life, Like a River to the Sea is defined by the boundless depths of human love. Eighteen years after losing his wife and their unborn baby, Jack finally remarried, and his new bride so honors the love between him and Lauren that her wedding ring includes stones that Lauren once wore on her finger. This is the magic of Like A River To The Sea, which begins with heartbreak but becomes a story about the triumph of the human spirit.

This book is the Winner of the OSCLG Outstanding Book Award The loss of a desired pregnancy or the inability to experience pregnancy are intensely personal phenomena; these losses are also, in our culture at least, extremely private. Communicating Pregnancy Loss is a collection of first-person narratives about the experience of pregnancy loss. Although there is no shortage of books that help prospective parents cope with an unintended pregnancy loss or 'survive' infertility, most of these books are authored by physicians or therapists and address pregnancy loss through the language of guidance. This book is different. It is the first of its kind because the contributors (primarily communication scholars but also healthcare personnel and other scholars from the social sciences) tell their story of loss in their own words, offering a diverse collection of narratives that span experience and identity. The authors employ various feminist theories, narrative theories, and performance theories as well as other well-known communication theories and concepts. The book's narrative approach to writing about and thereby understanding pregnancy loss offers readers a method for changing the way pregnancy loss is understood personally, culturally, and politically.

This book is the Winner of the OSCLG Outstanding Book Award The loss of a desired pregnancy or the inability to experience pregnancy are intensely personal phenomena; these losses are also, in our culture at least, extremely private. Communicating Pregnancy Loss is a collection of first-person narratives about the experience of pregnancy loss. Although there is no shortage of books that help prospective parents cope with an unintended pregnancy loss or 'survive' infertility, most of these books are authored by physicians or therapists and address pregnancy loss through the language of guidance. This book is different. It is the first of its kind because the contributors (primarily communication scholars but also healthcare personnel and other scholars from the social sciences) tell their story of loss in their own words, offering a diverse collection of narratives that span experience and identity. The authors employ various feminist theories, narrative theories, and performance theories as well as other well-known communication theories and concepts. The book's narrative approach to writing about and thereby understanding pregnancy loss offers readers a method for changing the way pregnancy loss is understood personally, culturally, and politically.

As a young nurse, Catherine witnessed the reality of infant loss and the tragedy of broken lives. She didn't think that God would allow it to happen to her or her unborn baby though. But when her first, and then second, daughter was born with a rare genetic condition, she was forced to question this belief.

Catherine and her husband nursed the girls until they died at the ages of ten and thirteen, respectively, never having had the ability to even recognize their parents. This is the story of Catherine's journey with God through this incredible heartache and loss. She honestly shares her disappointment, devastation, and even anger as she deals with the daily demands of her daughters.

In time, though, she came to see her situation differently. We stand "under the rainbow" with her as she experiences the reality of the promises of God, which eventually led to acceptance and freedom. More than an autobiography, the book considers issues such as friendship, helping children grieve, and turning pain over to God. It will make you laugh, and it may make you cry, but ultimately it will reveal to you a God who always keeps His promises.

A deeply transformative memoir that reframes how we think about death and how it can help us lead better, more fulfilling and authentic lives, from America’s most visible death doula.

For her clients and everyone who has been inspired by her humanity, Alua Arthur is a friend at the end of the world. As our country’s leading death doula, she’s spreading a transformative message: thinking about your death—whether imminent or not—will breathe wild, new potential into your life.

Warm, generous, and funny AF, Alua supports and helps manage end-of-life care on many levels. The business matters, medical directives, memorial planning; but also honoring the quiet moments, when monitors are beeping and loved ones have stepped out to get some air—or maybe not shown up at all—and her clients become deeply contemplative and want to talk. Aching, unfinished business often emerges. Alua has been present for thousands of these sacred moments—when regrets, fears, secret joys, hidden affairs, and dim realities are finally said aloud. When this happens, Alua focuses her attention at the pulsing center of her clients’ anguish and creates space for them, and sometimes their loved ones, to find peace.

This has had a profound effect on Alua, who was already no stranger to death’s periphery. Her family fled a murderous coup d’état in Ghana in the 1980s. She has suffered major, debilitating depressions. And her dear friend and brother-in-law died of lymphoma. Advocating for him in his final months is what led Alua to her life’s calling. She knows firsthand the power of bearing witness and telling the truth about life’s painful complexities, because they do not disappear when you look the other way. They wait for you.

Briefly Perfectly Human is a life-changing, soul-gathering debut, by a writer whose empathy, tenderness, and wisdom shimmers on the page. Alua Arthur combines intimate storytelling with a passionate appeal for loving, courageous end-of-life care—what she calls “death embrace.” Hers is a powerful testament to getting in touch with something deeper in our lives, by embracing the fact of our own mortality. “Hold that truth in your mind,” Alua says, “and wondrous things will begin to grow around it.”

Dear Mama, It is me, your broken son. Although the earth’s sorrows dimmed your light from us, I trust heaven has bestowed upon you the glory and dignity you deserve. You and I last spoke in February 2005, five days before you passed away. When you succumbed to your illness – which remains a mystery to this day – I was a mere 13-year-old who not only had to adjust to a new school, but also get used to the reality that you would never live to tell intriguing tales of your childhood. A decade has since passed and as I write you this note I have only heard from you once. You appeared in a dream to reprimand us for the culture of begging which we had adopted shortly after we laid you to your final rest. This is how Ace Moloi starts his book, a letter to his deceased mother. This book, this letter, is an important and necessary look at the state of our country 21 years into our democracy. It is the story of constantly holding your breath, hoping nothing else goes wrong. In a searing and beautiful narrative, Moloi manages to take the reader through various South African issues like: The trials of child-headed families in South Africa; The volatile issue of service delivery in townships; The story of broken families; Why Fees must Fall; Racial division in universities Funny in parts and tragic in others, this is the ultimate South African story.

Stillbirth, defined as the death of an infant between 20 weeks' gestation and birth, is a tragedy repeated thirty thousand times every year in the United States. That means more than eighty mothers a day feel their babies slip silently from their bodies, the only sound in the delivery room their own sobs. Eighty stillborn babies a day means heartbroken families mourn the death of children who will never breathe, gurgle, learn to walk, or go to school. In 2006, Janel Atlas became one of those mothers who left the hospital with empty arms; her second daughter, Beatrice Dianne, was stillborn at 36 weeks. Reaching out for comfort, she realized a dire need shared by so many others like her, and so was born a collection of new essays by writers each sharing their firsthand experiences with stillbirth. Atlas includes selections not only from mothers but also fathers and grandparents, all of whom have intimate stories to share with readers. In addition, there are selections that answer many of the medical questions families have in the wake of a stillbirth and that offer the latest research on this devastating loss and how it might be prevented. Grieving parents will find in these pages the comfort of knowing they are not alone on this painful path, validation of their babies' lives, and guidance from those who have suffered this tragedy. In addition, They Were Still Born both inspires and shows readers how to honor and remember their own babies and stories of loss. No parent- or grandparent-to-be sets out planning to purchase They Were Still Born. Unfortunately, there will always be readers-devastated, grieving, and searching for voices to help them through-who need it.

Experiencing a parent or guardian with cancer is extremely difficult for children and adolescents with healthcare professionals and cancer support centres often lacking the specialised knowledge needed to also support these individuals. This practical guide provides a comprehensive and current understanding of the impact of parental cancer on children, young people and families. It offers a longitudinal account of the impact of cancer through the different stages of the illness and explores the impact of culture and international contexts on how families experience parental cancer. The book also crucially focuses on how to support children, young people and families by examining existing interventions. Important chapters on death and bereavement, and on self-care for practitioners also supplement the book. A valuable handbook for healthcare practitioners from a range of specialities working with patients and families affected by cancer, including clinical psychology, counselling, nursing, oncology, palliative care and social work.

Death is inevitable, and yet the vast majority of the developed world seems to want to ignore this fact and avoid the sad inevitability. However, death is an inevitability, and trying to avoid talking about it is a mistake. Estimated Time of Departure takes readers on a journey of one man and his family having these discussions and how powerfully loving and revealing they were. In this funny, moving, poignant memoir, William Donaldson tells the story of how he talked with his parents over an extended period about their end-of-life thoughts and philosophy. He shares the sad, funny, maddening, sweet, and rewarding sides of this journey and makes a compelling and impassioned plea to readers to not miss this opportunity. They were not without sadness and challenges, but by virtue of talking and exploring the topic, the family came closer together and the inevitable passing became, while still sad, a cathartic, deeply rewarding event. Estimated Time of Departure was written to give readers the courage to have these discussions and shows that hope, love, and reverence can be seen by having them.

ANEW Creation is a true story about a family, their love for each other... and of baseball. When their oldest son Mitchell came down with an undiagnosed mysterious illness, Beth and Brad Thorp took him across the nation looking for answers. After five years, and still with no understanding of the cause, Mitchell passed away. The Thorps were faced with persevering through trials that tested their faith and yet ultimately found hope, joy, and purpose by creating the Mitchell Thorp Foundation to bring the light of hope for other children and families fighting for their tomorrows. ANEW Creation is an inspirational story about love, faith, perseverance, family, courage, community, forgiveness, God's grace, and restoration. It is written as a witness for Christ living through them and documenting his love and faithfulness throughout their journey, even though at times they felt God had abandoned them. God and Mitchell spoke to their spirits and profoundly showed them signs along the way to keep living and finding purpose in Mitchell's death. The Thorps hope and pray that their story will touch the hearts of many who need to know that heaven and eternity is real, and that God does intervene in their lives in awe-inspiring ways. The Thorps discovered that God never wastes a tragedy. He demonstrated that in their lives through the biblical principles of loving others in action and in truth-which ultimately created a supernatural phenomenon, a "ripple effect," that drew people to them and ultimately transformed many lives for the glory of God.