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Books > Sport & Leisure > Humour > General
As an author, Bill is probably better known, under his byline of Sean Collins, for his books set in the shadowy world of global intelligence. He has been contributing, under several bylines, to international magazines and press for over four decades. As a travel writer, critic and editor, Bill has travelled extensively, from Taipei and Tahiti to Hong Kong and Bora Bora. In Travails Abroad, he takes a retrospective look at the embarrassing dilemmas and outright disasters which have befallen him: from being glued to a jeep in Tahiti, being trapped in an outside toilet on a mountaintop in Turkey, and trying to attract the attention of the staff of a Berlin restaurant to the fact his wife was on fire. He says: `all the disasters in this book are absolutely true - I have witnesses. I trust what I endured may appeal to the reader's sense of humour and sympathy - they certainly didn't appeal to mine at the time...' Bill admits that potential travellers reading this book could be forgiven for deciding to stay at home.
My name is Holly Yellow. I can't spell for to ffee! At times I really thought being able to spell would feel like owning the world. Frankly, I have tried practically everything from normal tutors teaching me to crazy methods. It's only now I realise it really does not matter! Why did I think it did? Even when nothing makes any sense life goes on and so does Holly's fantasy misspellings. All the incidents actually happened a " the book is a true account of Holly's individual's experiences growing up. When you're near her you're guaranteed something is going to happen. The book gives a dyslexic humorous insight into the confusion, thinking and coping skills developed by Holly Yellow! As an author I have written this book for my friend Holly who cannot spell. All I can say if you can't spell, Oh Well What The Hell!
This book looks lightheartedly at golf and golfers, and includes some verse and cartoons illustrating many aspects of this wonderful game. The cartoons and the poems can be looked at and enjoyed individually and, perhaps, shared with others where you think the depictions might be particularly appropriate. Most golfers will be able to recognise, relive and smile at many of their own golfing experiences.
Frankie Flynn is a hunted man. Hunted by a gang of murderous thugs, by the police, the Irish intelligence service, his best friend Joe, and his own ever-loving wife, Peggy. Even Frankie's dog is out to get him.He did nothing to bring any of this on himself. By nature he is a kind, selfless and public-spirited person. He goes out of his way to give advice and support to friends and neighbours, even when the bastards don't deserve it. All he ever asks is to be left in peace to watch football on the telly, and occasionally to stroll down to his local boozer, Magowan's, for a pint. It was Frankie who was the inspiration behind the establishment of the pub golf society. Now his personal reputation and prestige in the community rest on Magowan's beating a rival pub in a major golf challenge. How is he going to make this happen as a fugitive, cut off from all that he holds dear?
If you are the sort of person who has ever had a spare moment at work (and let's face it who isn't) then this is the book for you. A neat little pocket format means you will never be without access to its stress-relieving pages. Finish the doodles, create your own and generally have fun at work with the Bored at Work Pocket Doodle Book! Creative, fun, partly finished doodles and other ideas adorn every page of this hilarious book. Sharpen your pencil to scribble in the spaces, colour in the shapes and add your own works of art.
The female Bill Bryson speaks out! YANKEE DOODLES is a quirky collection of culture clash anecdotes, musings and faux pas from a humour column in The Chester Chronicle and comic articles in Cheshire Life. 'Spotted dick is a cake with raisins? Phew!' * Enjoy an American Slice of British Life * Tasty and Nourishing * Good for the Funny Bone If you don't laugh, your money back! Rina Tillinger is the embarrassing American mother of four English children - and a teacher, folk artist and cruise ship speaker. 'The phone's engaged? When's the wedding?'
'The Flynns had lived in the Daymo since the time of Brian Boru, and I was damned if I was going to move out to some miserable suburb of concrete, cars and kids just because Peggy said so. The problem was that Peggy's say-so was a powerful thing, and it would take more than my veto to stop it.' Frankie Flynn only asks to be left alone to back an occasional horse, and to enjoy a peaceful pint with his friends and neighbours. Peggy, his wife, has other ideas. She wants to get out of the city, aspiring to a life of dinner parties, kitchen diners and en suite bathrooms. As well as Peggy's threat to his lifestyle, Frankie has to contend with a malevolent dog, armed criminals, his malingering son-in-law, being barred from his favourite pub, and much more.
Unlike some other reproductions of classic texts (1) We have not used OCR(Optical Character Recognition), as this leads to bad quality books with introduced typos. (2) In books where there are images such as portraits, maps, sketches etc We have endeavoured to keep the quality of these images, so they represent accurately the original artefact. Although occasionally there may be certain imperfections with these old texts, we feel they deserve to be made available for future generations to enjoy.
Eviscerated Panda - Vulgar Display of Panda is the third book that follows Reading's premier thrash band as they chase musical success and fulfilment. They play gigs in Camden, Coventry, Kentish town, Reading and High Wycombe. Often the need to also attend to the rest of their lives gate crashes their plans. Were it not for paid employment, families and the pursuit of women they would be a global success by now. They find some things are never easy, while some people are always easy. Phil revels in the attention of an interviewer, the Pandas record an album and Suzy's band management career sees her take on another group of men. Ian gets lucky, and then he gets lucky again and again. He'd like you to high five him right now. There's a metal pilgrimage to Wacken for some. The singer of another band troubles the Panda's womenfolk. A baby is born, some criminal activity occurs, a gig with a glam band bemuses. The near waking of a baby is averted by a story about Carrotlicker Tonguewiggle and chums (a band of bunny rabbits). There is a haircut, an engagement and peace made with old adversaries. If this all sounds too exciting rest assured there are also a great many band practices, cosy pub nights in the Green Man and a spot of shopping.The metal soap opera that is Eviscerated Panda continues...
Have you forgotten how to relax and enjoy yourself? Do you run around in circles mistaking dizziness for happiness? Your troubles are over, for you hold in your hands the means to take control of your destiny, to turn your back on obligation and conformity, or at least hide from them in the toilets for a bit. Shirk, Rest and Play is a comprehensive illustrated handbook for wannabe drop-outs, dreamers, drifters and gadabouts. Authors Andrew Grumbridge and Vincent Raison - along with their panoply of wastrel acquaintances - offer ruminations about finding beauty in the ordinary, lessons in tactical slacking and detailed advice on how to get more out of life by doing less. They cover all aspects of modern existence, moving smartly through Childhood, Work, Leisure, Home, Money, Health & Beauty and, of course, Death, where even amid the tears and sadness, you can still find plates of mini-burgers. This book is the call to arms you've been waiting for, giving you all the tips, shortcuts and (de)motivation you need to duck out of the system and live life on your own terms.
Tennessee has a lot to offer for its more than two centuries of statehood; from Coffee empires to music royalty, architectural wonders to nature's finest. This land of fascinating, exciting and downright weird people, places and events, makes Tennessee unique.
Unlike some other reproductions of classic texts (1) We have not used OCR(Optical Character Recognition), as this leads to bad quality books with introduced typos. (2) In books where there are images such as portraits, maps, sketches etc We have endeavoured to keep the quality of these images, so they represent accurately the original artefact. Although occasionally there may be certain imperfections with these old texts, we feel they deserve to be made available for future generations to enjoy.
Unlike some other reproductions of classic texts (1) We have not used OCR(Optical Character Recognition), as this leads to bad quality books with introduced typos. (2) In books where there are images such as portraits, maps, sketches etc We have endeavoured to keep the quality of these images, so they represent accurately the original artefact. Although occasionally there may be certain imperfections with these old texts, we feel they deserve to be made available for future generations to enjoy.
The cistern's companion. Thought provoking, humorous poetic offerings in response to the question, WHY? A rhythmical commentary from outwith the box", comically illustrated. For those quiet moments of reflection in the smallest room.
Unlike some other reproductions of classic texts (1) We have not used OCR(Optical Character Recognition), as this leads to bad quality books with introduced typos. (2) In books where there are images such as portraits, maps, sketches etc We have endeavoured to keep the quality of these images, so they represent accurately the original artefact. Although occasionally there may be certain imperfections with these old texts, we feel they deserve to be made available for future generations to enjoy.
Have you ever experienced a strong compulsion to head for the hills? In your dreams have you ever pictured yourself running free over some beautiful moorland landscape, with the wind in your hair and the heather tickling you elsewhere? Perhaps, until now, you have put it down to eating cheese before going to bed? Well, maybe it is the Call of the North - inviting you to explore the Pennines. Maybe it is time to set aside life's problems, step into the footprints of the heroes of old and lose yourself in some exquisite wilderness. Join Peter Lancaster as he dodges death and disaster travelling the Pennines, with only 'Auntie' (his 1963 Rover) for company...apart from his wife Jane, sheepdog and pint of beer. When life is an uphill struggle, why not pause and take a look at the view for a while?
Here is a collection of short stories and doggerel, told by a man who, due to retirement, has too much time on his hands. There are simple tales of simple tasks, carried out by someone against whom everything and everyone seems to conspire, and for whom nothing is as good as it used to be. Nothing is straightforward and very little goes right. Whether it's riding on a toboggan with his granddaughter or taking his cat to the vets, the results are invariably the same - disaster.
Unlike some other reproductions of classic texts (1) We have not used OCR(Optical Character Recognition), as this leads to bad quality books with introduced typos. (2) In books where there are images such as portraits, maps, sketches etc We have endeavoured to keep the quality of these images, so they represent accurately the original artefact. Although occasionally there may be certain imperfections with these old texts, we feel they deserve to be made available for future generations to enjoy.
A pictorial and factual view at what goes on behind closed doors in the exciting world of the new internet radio station Seaford Surf Radio. You may be shocked at the laughable shenanigans and antics of the board members. We uncover tories of intrigue and deception to downright funny. The newspaper articles are clever, quick witted and will bring a smile to your face. On top of that there is the challenge of Frogbeat's ultimate quiz challenges. Dare you try it? The book is more than a story; it is a journey which starts with an idea by Frogbeat and leads you through the changes and challenges from its initial concept of design to a fully established player in the entertainment industry. The road map has changed over the short period and demonstrates the diversity of the people involved - Enjoy!
Eats, Cheats and Leaves (How to deal with your philandering cad) is a humorous, self-help book in light verse. Beautifully illustrated by the cartoonist Gemma Hastilow (of Horrible Science fame), each verse takes us through the traumas of the woman betrayed, and how to deal with that philandering man. Starting with the caveat that: It isn't just men who're unfaithful, Some women are equally bad, But this booklet is written For women once bitten By the classic philandering cad. It therefore makes no apology for addressing women, who are told how to spot the philanderer, and then, for the unfortunate majority who don't spot him in time, how to deal with him and the chaos he causes. The verse takes us through 5 clearly marked parts, from discovery, through grief, anger and action-plan to recovery, and each part addresses the reader directly. This is a book for all women who have ever been betrayed, and for all women who are likely to be betrayed (so pretty much every woman). It is fast-paced, optimistic and a bit of a lark. As Caroline Sanderson from The Bookseller says: 'This witty and wise consolation in verse should be made available on prescription for every wronged woman. It dispenses oodles of sisterly succour, and lashings of healing humour.'
When in doubt, call Dad. Featuring flowcharts, illustrations and graphics, this guide will help you master every aspect of being a Dad and make time for what really matters… after all that thermostat isn’t going to obsess over itself. With simple steps to help you construct the perfect dad joke, a scientific formula to determine which dance moves will embarrass your children the most and a chart to establish the perfect (read: useless) fact for any occasion, this is the ultimate guide to being a dad. Learn how to:
WINNER OF THE THURBER PRIZE The compelling, inspiring, (often comic) coming-of-age story of Trevor Noah, set during the twilight of apartheid and the tumultuous days of freedom that followed. One of the comedy world's brightest new voices, Trevor Noah is a light-footed but sharp-minded observer of the absurdities of politics, race and identity, sharing jokes and insights drawn from the wealth of experience acquired in his relatively young life. As host of the US hit show The Daily Show with Trevor Noah, he provides viewers around the globe with their nightly dose of biting satire, but here Noah turns his focus inward, giving readers a deeply personal, heartfelt and humorous look at the world that shaped him. Noah was born a crime, son of a white Swiss father and a black Xhosa mother, at a time when such a union was punishable by five years in prison. Living proof of his parents' indiscretion, Trevor was kept mostly indoors for the first years of his life, bound by the extreme and often absurd measures his mother took to hide him from a government that could, at any moment, take him away. A collection of eighteen personal stories, Born a Crime tells the story of a mischievous young boy growing into a restless young man as he struggles to find his place in a world where he was never supposed to exist. Born a Crime is equally the story of that young man's fearless, rebellious and fervently religious mother - a woman determined to save her son from the cycle of poverty, violence and abuse that ultimately threatens her own life. Whether subsisting on caterpillars for dinner during hard times, being thrown from a moving car during an attempted kidnapping, or just trying to survive the life-and-death pitfalls of dating in high school, Noah illuminates his curious world with an incisive wit and an unflinching honesty. His stories weave together to form a personal portrait of an unlikely childhood in a dangerous time, as moving and unforgettable as the very best memoirs and as funny as Noah's own hilarious stand-up. Born a Crime is a must read. |
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