'Finlay Donovan is irresistible!' JANET EVANOVICH New year, new Finlay Donovan. She's got a list of resolutions and she's ready to bite the bullet. 1. No junk food. 2. No men. 3. No bodies in her minivan. But first, she owes the Russian mob one last favour - tracking down a rogue hitman with her nanny Vero, before the cops do. The small complication? This killer might be a cop himself. Enter distractingly hot Detective Nicholas Anthony, whose new citizens' police academy provides the perfect cover-up for Finlay to sleuth out the target - and some fresh ideas for her crime novel. Between firearms and forensics training, family dramas and hands-on research with Detective Nick, can Finlay get to her edits and the hitman before time runs out? She'll give it her best shot. With more dating, diapers and dodging bullets, the third book in the hilarious irresistibly lovable Finlay Donovan series is perfect for fans of Dial A for Aunties, Janet Evanovich's Stephanie Plum series, and Netflix's Dead to Me. PRAISE FOR FINLAY DONOVAN 'This series is magical! . . . Sharp, hilarious and heartfelt' CHRISTINA LAUREN, author of The Unhoneymooners 'I love Finlay Donovan so much I would 100% hide a body for her' JESSE Q. SUTANTO, author of Dial A for Aunties 'The best kind of escapist fiction . . . laugh out loud funny' JULIE CLARK, author of The Flight 'Skilfully combines suspense and laughs' NEW YORK TIMES 'Clever, dark, and laugh-out-loud funny' HEATHER GUDENKAUF 'Part rom-com, part mystery, pure joy!' CHANTEL GUERTIN 'Entertaining, funny and wholly original' CULTUREFLY 'Funny and smart, twisty and surprising - Finlay Donovan is a character to root for' MEGAN MIRANDA 'An unpredictable, fun, funny, page-turning delight' GWENDA BOND 'A madcap thriller that will keep you flipping pages long past your bedtime!' KATHERINE ST JOHN 'Clever, perfectly plotted, and laugh out loud funny . . . will make you smile long after you've turned the last page' WENDY WALKER

A stunning literary memoir from an exceptional Irish writer and comedian Marise was nine when she first realized there was trouble, 14 when her Dad tried to end it all, and 23 when he finally succeeded. In a turmoil of conflicting emotions Marise runs - from Dublin to Amsterdam to Los Angeles, leaving a trail of sex and self-destruction in her wake. Until finally, she finds herself facing what she's become in a California psych ward, a girl imploding through trying to make sense of her father's suicide. As she retells her unravelling, from child to adult, Marise strips back her identity and her relationship with her father, layer by layer, until she starts to understand how to live with him, years after he has gone. Written beautifully, with wit and unflinching honesty, Marise has produced one of the most profound coming-of-age memoirs of recent years, a stunning new voice in Irish writing.

The Infinite Monkey Cage, the legendary BBC Radio 4 programme, brings you this irreverent celebration of scientific marvels. Join us on a hectic leap through the grand and bizarre ideas conjured up by human imagination, from dark matter to consciousness via neutrinos and earthworms. Professor Brian Cox and Robin Ince muse on multifaceted subjects involved in building a universe, with pearls of wisdom from leading scientists and comedians peppered throughout. Covering billions of concepts and conundrums, they tackle everything from the Big Bang to parallel universes, fierce creatures to extraterrestrial life, brain science to artificial intelligence. How to Build a Universe is an illuminating and inspirational celebration of science - sometimes silly, sometimes astounding and very occasionally facetious.

If you were to master the twenty languages discussed in Babel, you could talk with three quarters of the world's population. But what makes these languages stand out amid the world's estimated 6,500 tongues?

Gaston Dorren delves deep into the linguistic oddities and extraordinary stories of these diverse lingua francas, tracing their origins and their sometimes bloody rise to greatness. He deciphers their bewildering array of scripts, presents the gems and gaps in their vocabularies and charts their coinages and loans. He even explains how their grammars order their speakers' worldview.

Combining linguistics and cultural history, Babel takes us on an intriguing tour of the world, addressing such questions as how tiny Portugal spawned a major world language and Holland didn't, why Japanese women talk differently from men, what it means for Russian to be 'related' to English, and how non-alphabetic scripts, such as those of India and China, do the same job as our 26 letters. Not to mention the conundrums of why Vietnamese has four forms for 'I', or how Tamil pronouns keep humans and deities apart.

Babel will change the way you look at the world and how we all speak.

PUBLISHER'S WEEKLY BESTSELLER What does it take to grow up cool and popular, master adulthood, fast track your success, and always be your best? Laura Belgray wouldn't know. Her wildly relatable coming-of-age stories include hate-following her 6th grade bully on social media decades later; moving home post-college to measure her self-worth in hookups with Upper West Side bartenders; dating a sociopathic man-baby; proving herself in the early '90s at New York's coolest magazine (as the world's worst intern); falling for get-rich-quick schemes on the Internet; and, most of all, saying "tough titties" to the supposed-to's in life: driving a car, being on time, handing in your paperwork, learning to roast a chicken, and having kids. Peppered with cutting insights on our confusing, self-helpy culture that calls hair removal "self care" and tells us to give our 110% but also to give zero f*cks, Tough Titties will leave you feeling better about, well, everything. Let's face it: we're all tired of shame-spiraling after being told what to do when we know we're not going to do any of it. Tough Titties is one big permission slip to be a dork, a sometimes-unspiritual slacker, a late bloomer and, ultimately, 100% yourself. It'll also have you snort-laughing in public and tapping whoever's nearby to say, "Lemme read you one more part!" Which is annoying, but tough titties. "Nobody makes me laugh like Laura Belgray. She's got a one-of-a kind knack for taking the shame out of life's most humiliating moments. Tough Titties is a hilarious, must-read permission slip to be 100% you." - Marie Forleo, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Everything is Figureoutable

Stories and yarns about my favourite bits of Down Under Paul Hogan's ancestors were a couple of Irish blow-ins who arrived in the colony of New South Wales by boat, with a little assistance from the judges of the Old Bailey. Blow-ins from everywhere have been coming ever since, and while it hasn't always been a walk in the park, Hoges reckons this mixed-up mob of old and new inhabitants works most of the time. In fact, according to Hoges, Australia may well be the best country on earth. In Australia, According to Hoges, the comedy legend explores some of the highways and byways of his country's past and present to map out all that is strange, marvellous and majestic about his homeland and why Australia qualifies as the Eighth Wonder of the World. From the rich and ancient culture of the island continent's Original human inhabitants to its prison-farm phase, from a baptism by fire through wars and depression to a passion for sport, gambling and outdoor cookery, and from the influence of Marlon Brando on a teenager from Sydney's western suburbs to the culinary wonders brought by new arrivals from all around the world, Hoges portrays a nation that believes in a fair go for all and never takes itself too seriously. Full of laugh-out-loud yarns from Hoges' and the nation's past, Australia, According to Hoges is a love letter to Down Under. As Hoges says, 'We're not perfect, but we're working on it.'

Quality time alone on the lavatory is a truly special occasion. What better way to celebrate and honour this ritual than with some extraordinary reading material? Lord of toilet trivia and master architect of poo-themed puzzles, Hugh Jassburn has unloaded his creative bowels once more in this astounding collection of all-new amusements. From eye-watering stats to mind-boggling mazes, this special edition is anything but bog-standard.

Anarchy in the Art Gallery is a humorous and thought provoking illustrated book: a re-imagined trip through Western art and cultural history, and one not limited by time or space. It mixes characters, places, events and situations to create fresh and interesting new possibilities: Lowry paints science fiction, Jane Austen is a cage fighter, Magritte takes his driving test and Anne Hathaway was the real author of Shakespeare's plays. People, situations and ideas are taken out of context and mixed to create new stories. Two Bruegel peasants steal clocks from a Dali painting, a tourist cycles through Van Gogh's cornfield and Picasso's Demoiselles d'Avignon appear in Monet's waterlily pond. From art and writing to philosophy and popular culture, this book is a funny, fresh and irreverent journey through our collective cultural past.

This latest book from ex- Queen Mary entertainments officer Paul Curtis collates a lively selection of stories about some of the greatest and most fascinating passenger ships to ever ply the world’s oceans. Stories range from tragic to funny, from elegant Cunard Queens to smaller cruise liners, and even the Royal Yacht Britannia. They present vivid snapshots from the lives of these vessels across war and peace, covering such matters as the foibles of captains, the escapades of passengers and crew, the most terrible disasters, and the greatest thrilling rescues. This collection of intimate portraits of the most famous and notorious ships of all time, relayed in the author’s trademark humorous style, is sure to be the perfect accompaniment to any voyage, whether on the high seas or simply from an armchair at home.

Rhetoric gives our words the power to inspire. But it's not just for politicians: it's all around us, whether you're buttering up a key client or persuading your children to eat their greens. You have been using rhetoric yourself, all your life. After all, you know what a rhetorical question is, don't you?

In this updated edition of his classic guide, Sam Leith traces the art of argument from ancient Greece down to its many modern mutations. He introduces verbal villains from Hitler to Donald Trump - and the three musketeers: ethos, pathos and logos. He explains how rhetoric works in speeches from Cicero to Richard Nixon, and pays tribute to the rhetorical brilliance of AC/DC's "Back In Black". Before you know it, you'll be confident in chiasmus and proud of your panegyrics - because rhetoric is useful, relevant and absolutely nothing to be afraid of.

Do you fondly remember messaging your crush on MSN after school? Miss those shoes that never recovered from the sticky floors of your hometown nightclub? And can't stand your spare-room housemate after lockdown?! Then escape with this year's most feel-good read! _______ 'THE YEAR'S MOST ORIGINAL ROMCOM' ELLE 'David Nicholls for millennials' i 'Made me smile, laugh, cringe and inwardly cheer' 5***** READER REVIEW 'Found myself wincing and laughing with familiarity' EMMA GANNON 'Hilarious' Evening Standard, 'Best New Books in 2021' 'Funny and compelling from page one!' LUCY VINE _______ Ellen and Alexa have survived hangovers, dodgy landlords and most of their twenties together. But can they survive this? While nursing The Hangover from Hell, a flooded kitchen leads best friends Ellen and Alexa, and hapless housemate Jack, into their attic to turn off the water supply. But when Ben - Alexa's date from the night before - walks in, the door slams, the handle breaks and all four are trapped. Cue the Worst Ever morning-after-the-night-before. As the hours tick by, Ellen nurses her sore head and watches as her best friend falls for this handsome stranger. Only for a horrifying realization to hit. She is sure she knows Ben from somewhere. Frantically searching her memories, Ellen pieces together exactly how they've met before. Is Ben really who she thinks he is? And, most importantly, what on earth is she going to do about it . . . This is a hilarious story of housemates and hangovers and friendship and dating as four twenty-somethings discover what The Worst morning-after-the-night-before really looks like . . . Fans of Beth O'Leary, Mhairi McFarlane and Dolly Alderton will LOVE this oh-so relatable tale of what can happen behind locked doors AS SEEN IN GRAZIA _______ 'The Lock In is a dream read: an immaculately plotted romcom which vividly captures both late teenagehood and twentysomething houseshares' i 'I LOVED this book . . . I highly recommend The Lock In' CARRIE HOPE FLETCHER 'Beautifully written, warm and fun with a dose of early noughties nostalgia' Laura Kay, author of The Split 'I cannot recommend this book enough!' 5***** READER REVIEW 'A funny, joyful hug of a book! A nostalgic, pitch perfect ode to the awkwardness and hilarity of yearning teenage years and house sharing in your twenties' Cressida McLaughlin 'Immensely readable, witty and well-crafted . . . a very millennial tale of love, loneliness and friendship' i

Start grooming your Gandalf and break out your Blessed; the beard is back. This impeccably turned-out little guide on the world's most famous facial embellishments will teach you how to groom, craft, style and quote your way to beard greatness.

100 SWEARY TEAR-OUT POSTCARDS TO DELIGHT YOUR NEAREST AND DEAREST, FROM THE CREATOR OF EFFIN' BIRDS Ever since Effin' Birds first appeared on social media, fans have been clamouring for a way to deliver these lavishly illustrated profane messages in the real world. Today is the day that their prayers and DMs are answered: Greetings from Effin' Birds is a book of 100 tear-out postcards, featuring new birds and new jokes, plus 100 absolutely true* Bird Facts that will help you spot these fine avian creatures in your everyday life. The bewildered gander wants to talk about how fucked everything is... The fretful scaup wants to know how long this bullshit is going to take... The rational sheldrake is losing its fucking mind over here... and 97 more! *All 100 Bird Facts are completely untrue.

GET D!RTY
Next time you're traveling or just chattin' in Chinese with your friends, drop the textbook formality and bust out with expressions they never teach you in school, including:
-Cool slang
-Funny insults
-Explicit sex terms
-Raw swear words
"Dirty Chinese" teaches the casual expressions heard every day on the streets of China:
-What's up? Zenmeyang?
-Fuck it, let's party. Qu tama, zanmen chuqu feng ba.
-Who farted? Shei fang de pi?
-Wanna try doggy-style? Yaobu zanliar shishi gou cao shi?
-Son of a bitch!Gouniangyang de!
-I'm getting smashed. Wo ganjue heduo le.
-I can't eat this shit! Wo chi bu xia qu!

Read how Jesus feeds five thousand geezers with just five loaves of Uncle Fred and two Lillian Gish. Or how Noah built a bloomin' massive nanny. Then there's always the story of David and that massive geezer Goliath, or the time when Simon's finger and thumb-in-law was Tom and Dick in Uncle Ned and Jesus healed her... A very down-to-earth 'translation' that brings scripture out of the pulpit and back onto the streets. 'It certainly is a good laugh while imparting the essential message of the Bible.' Reverend Stan in The Badge, the London cab drivers' newspaper

This is not a book about parenting. There are 1.3 billion of those already, and the main thrust is, 'if possible, try not to be a shit parent.' Instead, this is a book about us. You and me. The knackered parents, flailing about in the supposedly 'easier' Middle Years, when our babies have sprouted body hair and attitudes, we're supposed to be 'getting our life back' at last . . . but everything feels as if it's gone a bit tits down. From puberty to parents' evenings, anxiety to A-Levels, divorce to depression, sex to social media, hormones to . . . Jesus, is that chin hair?! This comprehensive, honest, hilarious and at times heart-breaking rummage through the Rotting Salad Drawer of Midlife (TM) that we all go through but nobody tells us about until we're already drowning in it, holds your weary hand and offers a giant, life-saving snog of, 'IT'S OK. IT'S NOT JUST YOU'. Praise for The Middle Years: 'Everyone in the middle years of parenting needs to read this frank, funny and courageous book!' - Beverley Turner 'A TRIUMPH! Liz nails the reality of the Middle Years with humour, empathy and fearlessness. I laughed out loud, teared up and cringed.' - Natasha Pearlman, Executive Editor of Glamour US 'This is a brilliantly insightful, wonderfully written, bloody funny book!' - Ben Shephard, Good Morning Britain 'I am reading this and crying with laughter.' - Tanya Byron

PRE-ORDER NOW: THE BRAND-NEW BOOK FROM MARIAN KEYES, THE INTERNATIONALLY BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF THE BREAK AND THE WOMAN WHO STOLE MY LIFE 'SUCH a treat. Like reading the cleverest cream cake of words' Caitlin Moran MEET JESSIE, CARA AND NELL. Married to brothers Johnny, Ed and Liam Casey. Three very different women tied to three very different men. Every family occasion is a party - until the day the secrets spill out. PLAYTIME IS OVER. BUT WHERE ARE THE GROWN-UPS? Praise for Marian Keyes: 'Mercilessly funny' The Times 'Clever, hilarious, poignant' Sunday Times 'Wildly funny, romantic and nearly impossible to put down' Daily Mail 'Guaranteed to make me laugh on the very first page' Liane Moriarty 'Everything this woman touches turns to comic gold' Cosmopolitan

'If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.' One of the most prolific and respected playwrights of the twentieth century, Bernard Shaw's legacy shows no signs of waning, and his beautifully written plays, laced with wry wit and invective alike, have seen countless performances over the years, their finest lines paraded in literary conversation and review. Meticulously selected by Simon Mundy, Wit and Acid collects the sharpest lines from the Shaw's oeuvre in one neat volume, allowing the reader to sample some of the very best barbs and one-liners the twentieth century has to offer.

Drawing on a lifetime of sniffing petrol fumes, Lights Out, Full Throttle stands large over the landscape of Formula One and takes the temperature of the good, the bad and the ugly of the petrolhead’s paradise. Johnny Herbert and Damon Hill between them competed in 261 Grands Prix, amassing twenty-five wins, forty-nine podium finishes, one World Championship, 458 championship points, a Le Mans win, two smashed ankles, a broken arm, wrist and leg, sixty broken ribs, and two bruised egos. Having retired from racing, Johnny and Damon have become the one constant for passionate English F1 fans in a rapidly changing landscape. They have earned cult status as commentators and pundits, with viewers loving their unerring dedication to the sport’s greatness. It offers F1 fans a tour of the sport – from Monaco to Silverstone; Johnny’s crowd surfing and Bernie’s burger bar; the genius of Adrian Newey and Colin Chapman; why Lewis Hamilton will never, ever move to Ferrari (probably); getting the yips; money; safety; what it’s like to have an out-of-body experience while driving a car in the pouring rain at 200 mph; and the future of the sport in the wake of Covid-19 and Black Lives Matter. Whether you’re a fan of Nigel, Niki, Kimi or Britney, pine for the glory days of Brabham, Williams, Jim Clark and Fangio, or believe that Lewis is one year away from retiring as the GOAT, Lights Out, Full Throttle is the oily rag for the petrolhead fan to inhale while waiting for the racers to line up on the grid.

The Sunday Times top 10 bestseller. Laugh along with Michael McIntyre as he lifts the curtain on his life in his revealing autobiography. Michael's first book ended with his big break at the 2006 Royal Variety Performance. Waking up the next morning in the tiny rented flat he shared with his wife Kitty and their one-year-old son, he was beyond excited about the new glamorous world of show business. Unfortunately, he was also clueless . . . In A Funny Life, Michael honestly and hilariously shares the highs and the lows of his rise to the top and desperate attempts to stay there. It's all here, from his disastrous panel show appearances to his hit TV shows, from mistakenly thinking he'd be a good chat show host and talent judge, to finding fame and fortune beyond his wildest dreams and becoming the biggest-selling comedian in the world. Along the way he opens his man drawer, narrowly avoids disaster when his trousers fall down in front of three policemen and learns the hard way why he should always listen to his wife. Michael has had a silly life, a stressful life, sometimes a moving and touching life, but always A Funny Life.

The #1 New York Times bestselling author of What If? and How To answers more of the weirdest questions you never thought to ask.

The millions of people around the world who read and loved What If? still have questions, and those questions are getting stranger. Thank goodness xkcd creator Randall Munroe is here to help. Planning to ride a fire pole from the Moon back to Earth? The hardest part is sticking the landing. Hoping to cool the atmosphere by opening everyone’s freezer door at the same time? Maybe it’s time for a brief introduction to thermodynamics. Want to know what would happen if you rode a helicopter blade, built a billion-story building, made a lava lamp out of lava, or jumped on a geyser as it erupted? Okay, if you insist.

Before you go on a cosmic road trip, feed the residents of New York City to a T. rex, or fill every church with bananas, be sure to consult this practical guide for impractical ideas. Unfazed by absurdity, Munroe consults the latest research on everything from swing-set physics to airliner catapult–design to answer his readers’ questions, clearly and concisely, with illuminating and occasionally terrifying illustrations. As he consistently demonstrates, you can learn a lot from examining how the world might work in very specific extreme circumstances.

Featuring comedic captions revealing what cats are really thinking while they do their number twos, this eye-watering collection of photos is guaranteed to gross you out while cracking you up Cats gotta crap, just like people. But unlike us, they do it where we can see it. And we watch them in the act like the absolute weirdos we are. Sometimes we even take pictures. What must our feline companions think of all this? Well, Pooping Pets: The Cat Edition is here to capture and share these priceless moments in all their disgusting glory. Within its pages, you'll find the private thoughts of cats as they do their business, including: Did you say your lovely lawn needs some fresh fertilizer? If you rush me, I'll save a few nuggets for your slippers! Can you make yourself useful and come wipe up? Not for the faint-hearted, but the perfect gift for lovers of toilet humour, this poo-blication is a steaming tribute to the bodily functions of our four-legged friends.