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Books > Sport & Leisure > Humour > Parodies & spoofs
'The perfect antidote to 2020' Huffington Post 'A must-read if you
like funny things' Greg James 'I had no idea Pat Sharp's life story
would be so hilarious and I strongly suspect neither did he' Nish
Kumar Pat Sharp is a man out of time. For those of a certain
generation, he is an iconic figure synonymous with good fun, great
hair and excess gunge. For others, he's just that bloke with a
mullet. Fame is a fickle beast and, since the cancellation of Fun
House in 1999 ('Just ten years into its run, when it was finally
finding its feet'), Pat has become a reclusive figure, only
emerging from his splendid isolation to pop up on things like I'm A
Celebrity: Get Me Out Of Here, Never Mind the Buzzcocks and Come
Dine with Me. Until now. With time on his hands and now reliant on
a faulty memory, Pat has expertly blended fact and . . . fiction:
revealing all about his adventures with David Hassselhoff at the
Berlin Wall in 1989; how he broke up a fight between Damon Albarn
and Liam Gallagher at a house party; the time he suggested Geri's
dress be a Union Jack; and much more. A definitive work (based on
very little fact) that anatomises the cultural trends of the '80s
and '90s, Re-run the Fun is just the kind of sorta-biography we
need in these turbulent times. Finally, the Great British public
can learn what life is like just about in sight of the top - the
highs, the lows and the hair tips. 'It's easy to forget, as I had,
that Pat Sharp is so much more than an iconic haircut and a
helter-skelter - and this well overdue book goes into hilarious,
largely-fabricated detail about Pat's critical role in shaping our
world today' Rick Edwards 'No previous knowledge of Pat Sharp is
required' Paul Sinha
Researched and written by two historians well respected in concentric circles, this hilarious take on our collective past reveals stunning new discoveries and fascinating new figures, from Koos van Doosch, the cheese pimp who settled the Cape a year before Van Riebeeck, to Shaka’s lesser-known brother, Nigel Zulu, who just wanted to be a florist.
You’ll discover how the winner of the Mr Mielie Board beauty pageant came to rule South Africa, and you’ll celebrate our greatest triumphs, like when Matt Damon and Morgan Freeman won the Rugby World Cup in 1995.
From small fat gold-plated rhinos in Mapungubwe, to small fat gold-plated polititians in Mangaung, The Unauthorised History of South Africa tells you the history you always wanted to know but were too afraid to ask.
There's no escape from chickens. They're everywhere (although
Bahrain has the highest human to chicken ratio at 40 to 1). You'll
find plenty of other often-hilarious facts together with practical,
historical and cultural information in The Bluffer's Guide to
Chicken Keeping, which lifts the cooking pot lid on the lives,
lusts and quirks on the world's most successful species of bird.
In a culture dominated by gym fail memes, sweat patches, and a bit
too much grunting, the fitness world is embarrassing enough without
not knowing what to do, how to act or what to say. Whether holding
your own in a fitness discussion with a high-intensity gym 'bro',
or nervously stepping onto the treadmill for the first time, The
Bluffer's Guide to Fitness is for everyone who wants to make
fitness a part of their daily life. Fitness bluffers of all ages
and genders will appreciate the hints, tips and no-nonsense advice
on how to bluff your way around a gym, park run or swimming pool;
how to pre-empt - and even counter-offer - fitness advice; how to
safely break fitness etiquette to your advantage; and how to look
and sound fitter than you actually are. Covering a broad spectrum,
from weightlifting and gym classes to home gyms and street fitness,
The Bluffer's Guide to Fitness is essential reading for bluffers
wanting to survive a trip to the gym; for bluffers wanting to
emerge victorious in a conversation with a fitness expert; and for
anyone who has flirted with the idea of fitness after realising
'cuddly' isn't actually a compliment.
From marital bliss to man flu, husbands are jolly good fellows, and
this tip-top collection of retro photos and frightfully funny
captions capture everything to love about marriage. The Wit and
Wisdom of... is a series of terrifically humorous books brought to
you by the rip-roaringly funny folks behind the best-selling
On-the-Ceiling greetings cards. Perfect as a birthday, Christmas,
Valentine's Day or Father's Day gift for long-suffering husbands
everywhere. Also available: The Wit and Wisdom of Dad, The Wit and
Wisdom of Mum and The Wit and Wisdom of the Wife.
The perfect companion for those extremely hardworking colleagues,
who like to pull sickies . . . 'Lawrence and Ben are enjoying a
bout of imaginary food poisoning. Food poisoning is always good
because it's over quickly and nobody likes to hear stories about
toilets.' __________ 'When Jesse gets home from a very big party,
he phones his manager and leaves a message. Now he does not have to
get up early to call in sick. 'Calling the office at 3:07am is
exactly what someone with a real cold would do,' Jesse thinks to
himself as he falls asleep on his stairs with a kebab for a
pillow.' __________ This delightful book is the latest in the
series of Ladybird books which have been specially planned to help
grown-ups with the world about them. The large clear script, the
careful choice of words, the frequent repetition and the thoughtful
matching of text with pictures all enable grown-ups to think they
have taught themselves to cope. Featuring original Ladybird artwork
alongside brilliantly funny, brand new text. 'Hilarious' Stylist
Explore other essential life companions in the Ladybird Books of
The Red Tape, The Meeting, The Zombie Apocalypse, and more.
Birds do it, bees do it. And guess what--cookies do it, too. In
fact, never have a pair of gingerbread cookies looked so pleased.
Yes, the Kama Sutra meets the Joy of Cooking. Featuring an
unabashed gingerbread couple, who are photographed in unflinching
full color, the Cookie Sutra is a recipe for pleasure.
There is The First Posture, where two are yoked as one (yet the
calorie count remains unchanged). The Pair of Tongs, allowing the
woman to be open, free, sweet and crunchy. Pounding the Spot,
requiring the suppleness of freshly rolled dough. There is
Scissors, Autumn Dog, Tripod, The Wheelbarrow, The Snake Trap. And,
for the advanced and adventurous, The Suspended Congress--great
care must be taken lest the cookies crumble.
'The iceberg always blinks at the last minute.' - @BorderIrish 'I
was living the quiet life, watching the traffic and the sheep go by
and then Brexit came along and I listened to people dismissing my
importance. I could see the danger coming in the distance, like a
cold front on the Tyrone skyline. So I thought, how can an
invisible border be heard?' 97 years young, the Irish Border may be
a late adopter of Twitter, but with more than 82k followers
including Taoiseach Leo Varadkar, Piers Morgan and Alastair
Campbell, the Border isn't so invisible anymore.
Learn all about the different kinds of meetings - brainstorms,
catch-ups, face-to-face, virtual, unattended - and how to avoid
them completely . . . 'People at work spend a lot of the day in
meetings. Meetings are important because they give everyone a
chance to talk about work. Which is easier than doing it.'
__________ 'Rudd attends meetings remotely from his home office. He
has three telephones, two Swiss desk intercoms, a fax machine and a
wall-mounted theremin. Sometimes nobody speaks to him for days.'
__________ This delightful book is the latest in the series of
Ladybird books which have been specially planned to help grown-ups
with the world about them. The large clear script, the careful
choice of words, the frequent repetition and the thoughtful
matching of text with pictures all enable grown-ups to think they
have taught themselves to cope. Featuring original Ladybird artwork
alongside brilliantly funny, brand new text. 'Hilarious' Stylist
Explore other essential life companions in the Ladybird Books of
The People Next Door, The Sickie, The Zombie Apocalypse, and more.
The PERFECT GIFT for that special grandparent you know so well and
love with all your heart but whom you haven't got a clue what to
get her for a present. Not a bloody clue.
_______________________________________ Grandparents are versatile.
They are babysitters, weather forecasters, mother's helpers, sweet
collectors, child-minders, knitwear suppliers, au pairs, curators
of G-plan furniture and providers of day-care for the under
twelves. Retirement is an exhausting job.
_______________________________________ Grandparents spend a lot of
time in the garden making everything tidy and pretty, so they have
something tidy and pretty to look at while they are doing the
gardening _______________________________________ This delightful
book is part of the Ladybird series specially planned to help
grown-ups with the world about them. The large clear script, the
careful choice of words, the frequent repetition and the thoughtful
matching of text with pictures all enable grown-ups to think they
have taught themselves to cope. Featuring original Ladybird artwork
alongside brilliantly funny, brand new text. Other titles in the
Ladybirds for Grown Ups series: How it Works: The Student How it
Works: The Cat How it Works: The Dog The Ladybird Book of the
Meeting The Ladybird Book of Red Tape The Ladybird Book of the
People Next Door The Ladybird Book of the Sickie The Ladybird Book
of the Zombie Apocalypse How it Works: The Husband How it Works:
The Wife How it Works: The Mum How it Works: The Dad The Ladybird
Book of the Mid-Life Crisis The Ladybird Book of the Hangover The
Ladybird Book of Mindfulness The Ladybird Book of the Shed The
Ladybird Book of Dating The Ladybird Book of the Hipster
Mallory Ortberg presents...Texts from Jane Eyre is a whimsical
collection of sharp, satirical and side-splittingly funny text
message conversations from your favourite literary characters. Of
course if Scarlett O'Hara had an unlimited data plan, she'd be
sexting Ashley Wilkes at all hours; and if Mr Rochester could text
Jane Eyre, his ARDENT MISSIVES would be in ALL-CAPS; and Daisy
Buchanan would text you from behind the wheel - and then text you
to come pick her up after the car crash. Texts from Jane Eyre is a
witty, original and very clever kind of mashup that brings your
favourite authors and literary characters right into the
twenty-first century. Mallory Ortberg is a genius.
Have you taken children to a gallery recently? Did you struggle to
explain the work to them in plain , simple English? With this new
Dung Beetle book, both parents and young children can learn about
contemporary art, and understand many of its key themes. Join John
and Susan on their exciting journey through the art exhibition,
where, with Mummy's help, they will discover the real meaning of
all the contemporary art works from empty rooms, to vagina
paintings or giant inflatable dogs.
The autobiography every true American has been waiting for: a
shockingly candid and raw confessional from a national
treasure.
From his humble beginnings in a desolate Iowa coal mining town, his
years at Our Lady Queen of Chewbacca High School to his
odds-defying climb to the dizzying heights of becoming America's
most trusted and beloved television News Anchor, Ron Burgundy pulls
no punches in Let Me Off at the Top
In his very own words Burgundy reveals his most private thoughts,
his triumphs and his disappointments. His life reads like an
adventure story complete with knock down fights, beautiful women
and double-fisted excitement on every page. He has hunted
jackalopes with Bobby Kennedy and Peter Lawford, had more than his
share of his amorous exploits, and formed the greatest on-air team
in the history of televised news. Along the way, he hobnobbed with
people you wish you knew and some you honestly wish you didn't --
celebrities, presidents, presidents' wives, celebrities' wives,
dogs, and, of course Veronica Corningstone, the love of his life.
Walter Cronkite, Barbra Streisand, Katie Couric, the list goes on.
Who didn't Mr. Burgundy, or "Ron" as he is known to his friends,
rub elbows with in the course of his colorful and often criminal
life?
This may well be the most thrilling book ever written, by a man of
great physical, moral and spiritual strength and not surprisingly a
great literary talent as well. This book deserves a real shot at a
Pulitzer Prize. In fact if it doesn't win one then we will finally
have proof that the Pulitzer is rigged.
Ron Burgundy has taken the time to write a book. We owe it to him,
as honest Americans, to read it.
First published in 1941, No Bed for Bacon is a comic classic. Out
of print since 1985, but much-discussed in the press following the
release of the Oscar-showered film Shakespeare in Love, the novel
fizzes with wit, warmth and the occasional custard pie. It is a
festive celebration of 'The Great Bard' par excellence. Five
o'clock and all's well in Merrie England. But not for long. Good
Queen Bess is stirring in her four-poster and is feeling neither
happy nor glorious. Down at the Globe, Will Shakespeare is chewing
the end of his quill: something's amiss with Love's Labours Wunne.
And Walter Raleigh, boiling his new potato in the depths of the
regal kitchens, is getting very hot under the collar of his latest
cloak - will his spud achieve the perfect fluffiness for The Royal
Tasting? Heads are sure to roll before the day is out.
Hurt me!' she begged, raising her skirt as she bent over the
workbench. 'Very well,' I replied, 'You've got fat ankles and no
dress sense.' Colin Grey's life was happy and simple until the day
everything changed - the day his wife read THAT book. Suddenly, he
was thrust head-first into a dark, illicit world of pleasure and
pain. Fifty Shed of Grey is the story of one man's struggle against
a tide of tempestuous, erotic desire and of the greatest love of
all: the love between a man and his shed. WARNING: This book
contains graphic shed-based images. Please don't look if you are
easily offended. Follow the phenomenon @50ShedsofGrey
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