Hippocampus returns to Athens from Troy under a curse from Zeus. He has only two days to sacrifice "that which he holds most dear" or be damned to Hades. His frantic search involves the Oracle at Delphi, Socrates and his girl-friend Asparagus. Partially inspired by an Abbot and Costello routine Sophocles explores every aspect of human life and a few in-human ones.

"Willy Loman, Nosferatu (or Biffo, the Vampyre Slayer)" is a parody of two of the most beloved American stage classics, Arthur Miller's "Death of a Salesman" and Tennessee Williams' "The Glass Menagerie." It turns out that the "Loman Line" is not Miller's lacerating examination of the selling of the American dream and his sympathy for the soul of the everyman, but a line of the Undead (Nosferatu) that have left a ruinous legacy of lunacy and calamity behind them. Willy Loman finds himself brought back to life and seeks revenge, while his two sons somehow become involved with the Wingfield family from "A Glass Menagerie," who have all found themselves reunited in Queens fifteen years after Willy's "first death." Wally of WPDP3 says, "Read the first two and cry; read the third and wonder why."

No matter how many brains you consume, it will never satisfy the soul. The stories in Brains for the Zombie Soul are intended to stir passion into the reader. Here are stories of love, of anger, and of perseverance. Hopefully, they will inspire you to overcome the difficulties you face in everyday life, and warm your heart, whether or not it still beats. Praise for Brains for the Zombie Soul: "A brave and moving contribution to the most urgent civil rights movement of our time." - Karen A. Wyle, author of Twin-Bred "No zombie can live on brains alone. Inspiration is now on the menu." - Noah Williams, Esq., Zombie Rights Lawyer

This laughable book of humour is the handiwork of a strange clown of startling brain cells which seem to have a funneeeeee life of their own, a funneeeeee guy who is apparently gifted with grey matter - grey hair, grey shirt, grey pants, grey socks and possibly grey underpants (unable to see the colour of his underpants), claiming grey to be his lucky colour. This fellow had also tried to be what he is not, i.e. acted, a cartoonist, and had drawn the funneeeeee sketches for this book with his trembling right hand as though he had seen a ghost. He also became one of his own cartoon characters under his shaky penmanship. The funneeeeee, cute author had wanted to be a comedian, an actor who makes people laugh, but was unable to realise this ambition. Now, he will "act" in this book and make people laugh. This book will definitely make everyone laugh. If the humour is good everyone will laugh at the humour. If the humour is bad everyone will laugh at the author, who we understand will blush. In any case, everyone will laugh. Reading this funneeeeee book should be the easiest and most fun way to strengthen and expand the grey matter. This book attempts to make fun of everything. Even the author himself is not spared. This book ambitiously aims at presenting serious ideas on many aspects of life, e.g., philosophy, politics, and science, etc., to readers in a non-serious, yet stimulating, style. It also aims at creating fun and bringing sunshine into the dull, humdrum lives of readers. It should relax our dear readers, improve our dear readers' moods and help sharpen our dear readers' minds, fortifying their mental fitness for meeting whatever challenges that lie ahead of them in the process. Importantly, as the title of this book implies, those who possess a copy of this book prove that they have grey matter - this is no joke. Furthermore, as the book is greyish, possessing a copy of the book is possessing grey matter. Ha Ha Ha Ha Those who do not possess the book do not possess this grey matter. Hee Hee Hee Hee Prove you have grey matter Get this grey book Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha This book also includes a humourous introduction by a successful businessman offering important views on business and management. The book has been given several rounds of publicity by the press.

ROMANCE NOVEL Smella Rosepetal must find a millionaire husband to finance her baby's heart transplant. She flies home to her father's ranch in Pitchforks, Texas, where she falls in love with Deadward Forest, a wealthy environmentalist vampire. When a deranged murderer is on the loose in Pitchforks, killing romance heroines, Deadward assumes Smella would be safer without him, so Smella goes on a perilous hunt for a rich husband. Time is running out for Smella's baby, and she must escape the Australian Outback, then face down Flabio, an overweight and disgruntled, aspiring cover model, plus enraged vampire wives and their homosexual, vampire, cowboy husbands, a jealous were-gerbil and Smella's strange boyfriend who wants to drain her blood, yet is repulsed by her smell. THE VAMPIRE HANDBOOK Before beginning that dark and shadowed journey into a life of eternal damnation, every vampire is required to read THE VAMPIRE HANDBOOK, a short step-by-step guide to becoming a vampire and then adjusting to the bloodsucking lifestyle. In addition to THE VAMPIRE HANDBOOK, you will also get THE WERE/SHAPE-SHIFTER HANDBOOK and THE ZOMBIE HANDBOOK. RALPHIE THE SPECIAL WEREWOLF Ralphie doesn't want to get snipped, but his pack is tired of watching him defile the pillow cushions. Now, he's got to find a mate by Halloween night- or else. MELVIN THE DRYCLEANING ZOMBIE Ever since Melvin could remember, he's had a crush on dry cleaning customer, Simone. Too bad he's a zombie and can't remember much. If only Simone would be his girl, or at the very least, let Melvin eat the gooey matter inside her cranium. VAMPIRE SHOE WAREHOUSE Bethany's tired of her dead-end job as a manager at a shoe store, but she can't quit or else her evil boss will expose her secret, resulting in certain death. Henry is a failure who dropped out of wizarding school, but that doesn't stop him from pining over Bethany. Can the world's worst wizard use his magic to save the girl of his dreams? Will that be enough to keep her from feasting on his jugular?

Fleeting mechanisms that image thought placement in a novel form of any Comedy Material must have the radiation called the animatical force that is the seducer and carnal from the anim get in where it fits in All the time that it is going through its gyrations, it sends forth an animatical force] Understand we are after the abstract of our own nature after divine, superior and inferior personalities in America. This is the scale of awareness. The name Lil Webe means running from demons. Healing using global repetitious unparalleled parodies offset ideas peaking, extemporaneously, one cannot pin point where one may be at in any given moment dialoguing pantomiming dancing at same time. Lil Webe imaging going in and out of thought placements for the comedic novel can overload readers. Two great masters, discussing dancing of Paula Kelly, ..". the interval between Gaps performers enter fold time, space into dimensions called ESP but it is not ESP. Rather thought patterns mathematically carrying memories frequencies on strings ..."

Nick Whittier has mastered a lot of different professions during his nearly seven centuries of existence. Now the lovable vampire is tasked with the most important job that he has ever had. When aliens attack Earth, it is up to Nick and his friends to defeat them. He has killed over 30,000 people to quench his thirst for human blood, but many more will die because of the decisions he makes as President of the United States. The odds are stacked against humanity, and Nick's latest job could be his last. Dark Moonlighting 4: The One with the Whales is the fourth book in the humorous Dark Moonlighting series. It explores science fiction cliches and pokes fun at popular movies and television shows like Independence Day, Star Trek, Signs, Battleship and Doctor Who. The Dark Moonlighting Series: Dark Moonlighting Dark Moonlighting 2: Kruse Control Dark Moonlighting 3: Live Free or Dark Moonlighting Hard Dark Moonlighting 4: The One with the Whales Dark Moonlighting 5: Electric Dark Moonlightingaloo